A Small Distraction

Synopsis: Don't you just hate it when you're trying to get something important done, only to be DISTRACTED by an annoying co-worker?

NCC Command Center

The blue metals used in the rest of New Crystal City have been darkened here, their reflectivity reduced without being eliminated. The lighting is a contrasting red that, once bounced off the blue of the surfaces, gives the area an ambience of very Decepticon purple. The walls of this very large, domed polygon alternate terminal and work station segments with large metal >PANELS< that curve overhead to join with the arch of the ceiling. The front of the room is distinguishable from the rest by the large monitors that replace four of the work stations and display various areas of the city. The three etched panels that divide these four monitors seem to glorify the city itself. >LEFT<, >RIGHT<, and >CENTER<, each depicts an incarnation of cities that have gone by the name of Crystal City. Almost conspicuous in its absence is any presentation of Airwolf's rebuild of Crystal City.

Americon is nowhere in sight. Surely this would be a good time to get some work done?

Blueshift is sitting at a desk. It isn't actually a desk but a cupboard tipped on its side. He has a pair of spectacles on as he ponders over a form. "Nam-E? What the hell?" he complains, staring about as he taps his pen. "What is this, in Nebulese?"

The cupboard suddenly rattles violently. "I once served in 'Nam," says something inside the cupboard as it shakes. "I was the lone survivor of Charlie Company, and we were assaulting Sausage Grinder Hill! All my friends were wiped out by friendly fire! And it was literally fire, from napalm! Not a great way to go! Then I woke up and realized I was having a dream... IN AMERICA!"

Hinder isn't immediately visible either, but she's not exactly trying to hide. She's just...short. She shuffles along the wall, exploring a room that's for the most part new to her.

"What in the PIT?" Blueshift shouts as he leaps to his feet, taking out a metal pole and ramming it violently into the closed cupboard like a deadly spike. "What IS it with you cassettes? Why won't you just DIE?"

Americon yells, "Holy crap, that went through my chest!" from inside cupboard. "I'm ok, though, I have four more flux capacitors where that came from! Say, do you need any help with those forms, good sir?"

Blueshift keeps stabbing the pole into the cupboard before looking round for more weapons. "I don't know, I am doing VERY WELL with it!" He holds the form up to the closed cupboard. "Once I put my pen against it, all will be right!"

Americon yelps, "Ow! Ooh! Eee! Ahh!" as the pike rams into the cupboard and possibly himself over and over. "Alas, it seems that I have been slain! Tell Hinder that I love him! Her! Platonically! And, now, I die!" The rattling in the cupboard ceases.

Blueshift takes out a spade and starts to dig a shallow grave in the metallic floor of the command centre. "Thank Primus for that!" he emits. "What's a Hinder? Is that something else that needs killing too?"

Hinder jumps and yeeks in startlement at all of the sudden noise, but after a moment realizes it's not aimed at her. She slinks toward the center of the room, trying to figure out what's going on. That mech there is...digging a hole? And what was that about her?

"Oh WHAT, is that a Foxfire?" Blueshift shouts as he picks up the spade and lurches towards Hinder, raising it high. "It's okay, I've got it, I'll cut it in half!" Hinder stops and stares up at Blueshift for one shocked moment, then with another shriek of panic starts to tear away from the clearly INSANE Decepticon.

 Blueshift says, "Emergency, we have a Foxfire infestation"

 Blueshift says, "It's okay, I am moving to MURDER MODE"

Suddenly one of the drawers in the cupboard is violently launched out towards Blueshift, possibly DISTRACTING him from his intended goal! Poking his head out of the cupboard is none other than Americon, perforated in several locations across his body, hanging onto the edges of the cupboard like it's some sort of amusement park ride. "Hinder is my... uh... sibling! I am not sure which gender, though! It is sometimes hard to tell, with robots!" A horrifying thought occurs to him, and he gasps! "My God, *I* might be female, and completely unaware of it!"

 Catechism says, "Terminate the spy with extreme prejudice."

 Blueshift says, "I have a spade"

Combat: Americon misses Blueshift with her What Am I!? (Grab) attack!

 Catechism says, "Which I think means you need to make politically incorrect comments about Blaster."

"You should be dead, why aren't you dead? I'll tape the Stan Bush rap song over you, you little monster!" Blueshift grumbles as Americon is sexually confusing. He throws the spade aside. "Now you are both my prisoners, get in the shallow grave, both of you!"

 Americon says, "Personally, I prefer Kill Mode! Last time I went on Murder Mode I killed Grumble and Soundwave put me in a box for a month!"

Americon flies past Blueshift in the drawer, eventually slamming against an actual desk. The cupboard shatters into wooden splinters, and Americon goes flying across the room. "Woah, hold on, gimme a sec to--" A Seeker gumby walks by on an errand, only to have Americon flying right into his face. "AAAIIIE!" the Seeker screams, flailing around blindly.

Hinder just keeps skittering away from Blueshift, not caring that his attention is back on Americon. She scrambles under a terminal unit that a human would be hard-pressed to fit under, then peeks out again to see if she was followed.

Blueshift slaps his form against a console then stares at Americon. "Before I kill you, you will help me fill out my PROMOTION APPLICATION." He waves it at Americon. "Question one - Nam-e".

Americon peels himself off of the Seeker's face, transforms to eagle mode, and flies back to Blueshift, whereupon he tries to land on his shoulder. "Hmmmm! That is a very difficult question! Nam-e! That does not sound like it was written in the American language! My suggestion to you, therefore, ergo, is to put "Not Applicable" on that line!"

Blueshift scrawls on the piece of paper and then slams it down on the console. In doing so he hits the 'Self Destruct' switch. "Grr this is too hard. I need a permanent assistant"

Americon hms, then yells at Hinder, "Hinder, get over here! We need an assistant to assist me in assisting Blueshift in the completion of a form! The questions are very difficult!"

Blueshift pulls out a pump-action pistol and cocks it "Yes come out Foxfire, come here"

Hinder looks at Americon, ready to do as he says. She IS good about listening to others. However, now Blueshift has a weapon aimed in her direction. So she doesn't move.

Americon CAWS loudly, spreading his wings widely. One of his wings gets right in Blueshift's face, obscuring the view of his target. "Ah, there you are Hinder!"

Blueshift swats at Americon. "Honestly, what are you doing here. Can't you just leap out and drown or something?"

Americon leaps off of Blueshift, circling overhead. "I cannot drown because I do not breathe air!"

Blueshift has no idea how to respond to that. "Dont be silly" he finally states. "All Autobots breathe air"

Hinder speaks up from her still-hiding spot. "He's not an Autobot."

Americon tries to perch on Blueshift's head. "Neither am I! I think!"

The console which had been set to self-destruct begins to smoke, and eventually starts an electrical fire which brings activity in the Command Center to an absolute halt.

No one fesses up as to who did it.