Retoris: The Relic Pt. 1

Alpha Centauri System

This trinary system consists of: Prima Facie, a yellow, Sol-like star; Altera, a smaller orange star; and Procul (Proximus), a distant red dwarf. It is the closest star system to that much-contested planet, Earth. Due to the gravitation effects between the three stars, anything captured by the system will either be pulled into one of the suns or have a very eccentric orbit between the three. Thousands of asteroids and comets follow strange orbital patterns, the remnants of a planet destroyed in Procul's explosive conversion to a red dwarf. Navigation is difficult but possible with experience; the stars' gravitational effects are predictable.

SPACE! The current frontier! It's rare that Transformer ships are dwarfed by other vehicles, but the massive antique trading junk ship owned by the universally known alien Grandpa Egg does just that. It's practically a small moon of junk- a floating flea market. An FTL capable giant Etsy store.

The small Autobot escort shuttle, the Astoria Carlton-Ritz, captained by Elita One, approaches to great the eccentric merchant.

Over the Autobot com, a mildly cracked and borderline racist sounding voice cackles a greeting! "Why hello Autobots! THis is Grandpa Egg here with a beautiful tour of Cybertronian airspace this morning! Here to set up my permanant shop in your lovely Retoris this fine day!" VOICED BY VICTOR WONG. RIP VICTOR.

Looks like this is going to go completely smoothly. Except pirates.

The small shuttle initiates its routine once-over of the large freighter. <> Elita pauses, who named this vessel anyway? She continues after a moment, as the shuttle begins its beam scan of the freighter. Unusual damage, weapons powered up and Cons clinging to the hull are all on the target list, Remember Autobot City and all that. <>

Elita One looks back to her motley crew. "Look at the size of that freighter, I was thinking about telling him that Cybertron should be docking up against HIM. Well, keep your eyes peeled. With a transport that size, there's no telling what could be aboard. Can I get someone on the analysis to feed me some intel, while I skim its hull?"

Wheelie is helping keep this floating junkyard sale safe... why, he's not entirely sure, but he wants to help the Autobots, so that's good enough for Wheelie! Actually, he seems quite at home amoung all the junk... it gives him lots of nooks and crannies to hide in and move around without being seen. Heck, the Autobots may not even know he's there to help! Wheelie is hiding inside a giant washing machine right now as he keeps a lookout on the far side of the ship. Who knows who might show up to cause trouble!

...actually, given the tendencies of most Decepticons, it's a safe bet it's them. So, yeah, and probably the rest of the Autobots, know that...

Horsepower was mostly here in case the ship needed any repairs.... though it turns out the thing just looks like a Junkion's wet dream rather than actually being damaged, so he's feeling slightly redundant at the moment. Oh well. "Thing looks like someone slapped some engines on the biggest rush hour pileup possible," is his oh so obstute observation of the moment.

Robot War Bear   vomits backburned energon into a massive sink. "My analysis is the stupidity of insisting I accompany you on mission in space!," he roars, before returning to the sink bowl. "And look at that ship...it's sure to explode as it enters Cybertronian orbit... This mission was doomed before we left the dock." He stares back down at the sink and makes that spit noise people make when they're barfing.

Decepticon Intelligence has given Shockwave all he needs to know about the incoming shuttle to lay a perfect trap. The shuttle's course, make, model, and loadout are all factored into the plan, as is the presence of the Autobot shuttle.

<p class="MsoNormal">It's a two pronged plan. The first becomes apparent when the Despoiler, with all of her pirate riggings included, bursts out of FTL alongside Grampa Egg's massive freighter. The Decepticon shuttle's weapons are already primed as it launches laser broadsides into the flanks of the ship, aiming for those huge engines. Shockwave has positioned the Despoiler well, putting the freighter between it and the Astoria Carlton-Ritz in order to buy them additional time.

<p class="MsoNormal">Even as laser bolts fly across the gap, Shockwave gives the order. <<Launch all fighters.>> From underneath the Despoiler's cannons, Decepticon space warriors fly out. Most of them are in their alt modes as they streak towards the freighter, firing their guns and generally harassing them. Although they don't engage the Autobot ship yet, they know it won't be long until they have no choice. They're ready to switch targets if needed.

<p class="MsoNormal">Shockwave himself disembarks last, hovering through space with Cybertron far beneath them. <<Grampa Egg, this is Shockwave. Surrender your vessel or face imminent destruction.>> Behind him, the Decepticons still aboard the Despoiler have hoisted the jolly-rogercon holo-flag.

<p class="MsoNormal">F-35B Lightning II <Contrail> pops out of warp with exactly no sound at all! How surprising! She is on net duty, which means that she is carrying the very special payload of a giant gravity net, designed to trap Grampa Egg's spaceship so that it cannot retreat. Setting up the gravity net will take valuable time that she could have otherwise used to punch faces. These are the sacrifices that she makes for her Empire.

<p class="MsoNormal">She starts to fly out the Eightfold Death gate pattern of the gravity net, trying to set up its wells. This will, of course, take some time.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: F-35B Lightning II <Contrail> sets her defense level to Protected.

<p class="MsoNormal">It would seem that Shockwave has made a habit of ordering Triggerhappy along with him on these missions, despite their contrasting methods of approaching situations in general. He flies out of the hangar bay, following just behind Shockwave and whoever else has disembarked with him, already bombarding the massive freighter's hull with high-energy photons from his pulse guns.

<p class="MsoNormal"><<Slag, look at the size of that thing! There's no way in the /afterspark/ we could pass this one up!>> he exclaims over the Decepticon comm channel. It was /so/ theirs.

<p class="MsoNormal">JU-87 <Banshee> pops out of the warp tucked in a small pod, which splits down the middle to disgorge her into space. There's some kind of bulky device strapped to her hull, several boxes that feed hoses into her intakes, and another which adds a flared nozzle to her exhausts and encompasses her propellor in some kind of energy field that lights it up in blue and green. She's also got a belly-slung liquid rocket pack, and at each wingtip, she's got a cluster of monopropellant RCS tanks, probably stolen from the Skunkworks during her raid on Palmdale. She's not silent, her Jumo engine overlaid with a sci-fi-sounding vox modulation.

<p class="MsoNormal">Both her holograms are wearing full oxygen masks, and she tip her wings to Contrail, pouring on the power.

<p class="MsoNormal">On board his ship, Grandpa Egg shakes his fists at the screen filled with Shockwave's face. "Damn you Decepticon! You will not steal my treasures so easily I am thinking!" He starts tapping buttons, and tons of weird do it yourself cannons and gimmicky weapons arm and start returning fire! They shoot all sorts of stuff- only a few are actual lasers. There's nets, cannonballs, small meteors, space glue...

<p class="MsoNormal">Grandpa Egg taps a few more buttons to bring Elita on screen. "Elita One! THe Decepticons can not be allowed to get their hands on the INCUBATION HYPER CHAMBER!! It will give them econimic power UNMATCHED in this sector of the galaxy!" And then he realizes he didn't turn the Shockwave screen off. "You didn't hear that!" He slams a fist on the keyboard, shutting off all communications." Grandpa turns, loading a space musket. "Robots, defend the ship!" Tons of wacky robots that look more like the robots from the movie Robots than anything from Transformers activate, swarming to defensive positions...

<p class="MsoNormal">Elita One looks over the schematics, "Nevermind, Chainclaw, I'll just..." And then the trap is sprung, with a wince, Elita calls back to the team. "Con ambush! Prepare for battle, look alive back there!" She starts punching in comms back to Retoris, as she twists the small shuttle aside from what appears to be a couch shot out from the great freighter. <<Elita-One to Retoris, we've got a Con ambush up here, requesting...>> She pauses, as a literal kitchen sink drifts by, <<reinforcements, looks like they're after some incubation chamber. Moving to engage.>> She calls back to the troops, "We can't stay on shuttle, it's too vulnerable, get to the freighter's hull, defend what you can. Use its size to our advantage." She adds to the holovid as she moves in for a landing on the larger vessel, "We'll keep them occupied. Set up for entry, they'll break off pursuit before they get in too close, just don't burn us up!" With that, she magnetizes the shuttle's landing with a loud ka=tump, then makes for the exit. "

<p class="MsoNormal">Horsepower just buries his face in a palm for a moment at the sound of Chainclaw wretching in the background. "Ah pity the maintenance crew after this mission, Ah really do." Everyone knows barf of -any- sort, energon biological or otherwise, is one of the top three worst things to clean up. Especially if you have a weak gag reflex. Robots don't have that, right? Hopefully those guys don't. Fortunately there's a distraction!

<p class="MsoNormal">

<p class="MsoNormal">Unfortunately it's because it's Decepticons. "Of all the piston punchin'... Can't these thugs give us a night off, just once..." Despite the expressions of exaggeration he's already heading for an airlock, doing a quick mental check to make sure he's got everything in order. If nothing else he's going to have to make sure the big egg over there doesn't crack like one. With a grunt he pushes out into space and drifts for a moment to orient himself. Fortunately he came prepared for this in case the ship needed repairs, and has a crappy thruster device on one hand to start pushing towards the freighter. Of course, the Decepticons parked their fat aft right in between them.

<p class="MsoNormal">But that thing was huge. Getting around to it shouldn't be -that- hard. Hopefully.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Horsepower deploys his reserve energon tank.

<p class="MsoNormal">Wheelie sort of saw it coming. But among the ridiculous fire being shot at the attacking Decepticons is actually military hardware... well, semi-military. Mostly, it's just Wheelie shooting down attacking ships. And he blends in rather well with all the gaudy junk that he remains fairly hidden while shooting. Of course, being accustomed to hiding in the most ridiculous of spaces, Wheelie remains out of sight even to those trying to look for him... but who would look for little Wheelie?

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Wheelie slips into the shadows and out of sight...

<p class="MsoNormal">Robot War Bear <Chainclaw>  groans in displeasure as the Decepticons arrive. "We're all doomed! I've brought this on us all!" His pretender shell activates, and the bear starts working into his space suit. What? He has organic parts. Now in his awesome retro bear shaped space suit, Chainclaw leaps out of the Autobot ship, ready to be shot at by Decepticons!

<p class="MsoNormal">The mechanical bear Chainclaw activates his Pretender armor, sealing himself in his armored brown bear form!

<p class="MsoNormal">Skids is hanging onto his station with the rest of this motley crew, trying to run as comprehensive a sensor sweep as he can while the shuttle maneuvers. "I only see two of them, but I think one is Shockwave." He turns his head to remind his comrade, "Wheelie, you're orange."

<p class="MsoNormal">F-35B Lightning II <Contrail> continues to fly out the pattern, still deploying the gravity net. Running interdiction duty sure is boring! But necessary and vital to the Empire. After all, Shockwave needs his hyper incubation chamber!

<p class="MsoNormal">Shockwave had a full read-out of the freighter but not all of its inventory. He doesn't know what a hyper incubation chamber is, and so the Decepticons aren't specifically after it. Still... <<Those Decepticons boarding the freighter, keep watch for any hyper incubation chambers.>> The variety of ammunition coming from the freighter is more nuisance than danger, but a couple Decepticons are trapped by the glue globs. Truly, glue guns are the most powerful guns of them all. Shockwave himself is struck and smothered by a net, but he spreads his arms outwards, tearing through it as if it was tissue paper.

<p class="MsoNormal">While Contrail works to set up the gravity net, Shockwave blasts one of the wacky robots Grandpa has unleashed on them. The rest of the space warriors worry about taking out those engines so the ship'll be susceptible to the net. Glancing past the freighter, Shockwave can see the Autobots maneuvering to engage. <<Wings one through five, break off and move to attack the Autobot vessel.>> That should keep Elita One and her ilk busy.

<p class="MsoNormal">Skids reads off, "I'm getting more Descepticon reinforcements coming. Two so far."

<p class="MsoNormal">JU-87 <Banshee> pours on the power, flames forming in the exhaust nozzles, and a larger ones in the twin nozzles of the belly pack. The Stukacon waffles a little, unused to the maneuvering pack's strange thrust pattern. Finding her nose pointed roughly at Chainclaw, she takes a moment to cackle madly before opening up with he wing cannons!

<p class="MsoNormal"><<Guten tag, Autobot abshaum!>>

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: JU-87 <Banshee> strikes Giant Armored Bear <Chainclaw> with her Space-Strafing! (Pistol) attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Grandpa Egg diverts his comm and ship contrils to a cool wrist watch to keep in contact with Elita and quickly waddle run through his ship. "Elita One, I'm sending you coordinates of several alternate ports of entry that the Decepticons have not yet overtaken! The incubator must be saved!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Giant Armored Bear <Chainclaw> roars as he's struck by Banshee. "You'll die by my claws, Decepticon!" And then, as he zooms forward..."If we're not all consumed by microscopic metal eating space fungi first!" He back lasers power up and unleash, well, lasers. At the Decepticon. BACK LASERS! <<Make your move, Elita! I will draw the fire of these inferior creatures! Beware of the cosmomildew that's sure to have built up inside that freighter!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Elita One nods to herself as Grandpa Egg gives her the advantage needed. Her audio receptors flicker as she delivers out a message to the team. <<Bots, we've got internal access, let's change up the playing field. Find one of those hatches, and secure the area!>> She raises her cannon, firing off some warding shots to the wings sent to engage. "Chainclaw, this'll be a great killzone for you. Wheelie, stick with him!" She uses the proffered access code on one of the further off entry points, enters, then quickly slaps together a proxy mine in the area. <<Grandpa Egg, with internal systems only, show us coordinates for this Incubator. Flicker the lights or something on the way..."

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Giant Armored Bear <Chainclaw> strikes JU-87 <Banshee> with his back bear lasers! (Laser) attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Skids murmurs, "Okay, where's the hatch controls? Okay, move us up and I'll open it."

<p class="MsoNormal">As it would come to pass a couple of generic space-cons have landed near one of the hatchs, trying to figure out how to open it. "Crowbar?" "Blowtorch." "Oh you always want to start plasma fires." "And you would rather just break it." "It works!" "Cutting is more stylish!" "I'll cut yo--" One stops as a shadow appears between them. "--What's that?" "What's what?" The other turns to look up/behind them, and lets out a yelp.

<p class="MsoNormal">

<p class="MsoNormal">Just before a pair of massive metal feet slam down on top of them, Horsepower stradling the hatch between them. "Ugh. Can't space-walk nowhere without steppin' in slah out here." He steps off, shoves one into the other with his foot, and kicks them both off the hull of the ship.

<p class="MsoNormal">Will anyone notice a couple of Cons now drifting haplessly back into the firefight? Hopefully not.

<p class="MsoNormal">Wheelie nods as Elita gives him orders... but stops, blinking a little before turning back to his radio. "Ms. Elita, I must ask, are you sure this is my kind of task? I've figured out the nooks and guts of Grandpa's boat, I could--" Wheelie is interrupted mid-rhyme as Chainclaw's roaring catches his attention. The bear might be in need of help! "Scratch that, Elita cat, I'll splat the bear's rat, true dat!" And he ducks under an old fridge, making his way towards Chainclaw's location.

<p class="MsoNormal">Triggerhappy is happily blasting away at the freighter's outer hull, basking in the amazingness of the sights and sounds of his weapons firing into its armor plating. But then Blowpipe speaks up and rains on his parade.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Triggerhappy, we're not doing much from the outside...if we want this oversized crate of scrap and whatever's on it, we'll need to get inside and commandeer it somehow. Ideally without inflicting critical damage. And don't even /start/ to say what I think you're about to say. It would take us meta-cycles to blast through the hull at the rate we're going."

<p class="MsoNormal">"Ugh...frag you Blowpipe!" Because the Nebulan has made it necessary for him to stop shooting for at least twenty astroseconds in order to scan the hull and find a way inside.

<p class="MsoNormal">"...there." Blowpipe points out, having spotted Horsepower kicking a couple of gumbies off of the freighter's surface. "That Autobot has found a way inside. I suggest we follow him."

<p class="MsoNormal">"Score!" the Targetmaster shouts. Excellent! An seriously legit excuse to start shooting again! He flies toward the port after the large Autobot, pulse guns blazing once again.

<p class="MsoNormal">Triggerhappy transforms into a blue and white Cybertronian aircraft.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> sets his defense level to Fearless.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> strikes Horsepower with his Photon-Pulse Guns attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">JU-87 <Banshee> snarls as the shots burn into her armour, the stuka pulling a 90-degree snap-roll to avoid crashing into Chainclaw. Looping around, she points herself at the bear-pretender again. It looks like she's going to ram, but the stukacon is used to three-dimensional fighting, and the lack of gravity in space just turns it into a game.

<p class="MsoNormal">A 50kg bomb is released as she pulls away, continuing along her former flightpath as she comes around for another go!

<p class="MsoNormal"><<Isn't zis such fun?>>

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: JU-87 <Banshee> strikes Giant Armored Bear <Chainclaw> with her 50kg GP Bombs attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Shockwave can see from here that numerous Autobots have boarded the freighter. They may be going after this mysterious hyper incubator that Grandpa Egg was refering to, but ultimately Shockwave dismisses any concern over it. The Decepticon objective here was to steal the ship and destroy any further attempt by the Autobots to lure third party funding to their cause. It seems too likely that this new McGuffin is simple a wild goose chase. No, best to stick with the plan.

<p class="MsoNormal">As he hovers towards the huge freighter, Shockwave sees two of his soldiers floating past him with big footprint marks on their chests. Casting his gaze along the trajectory they came from, Shockwave spies Horsepower. He's about to direct Triggerhappy to go kill the dogooder, but the Targetmaster is already on the case. Shockwave then takes aim at the port engine of the freighter, firing a wide blast that sends vibrations rippling through a quarter of the ship. <<Contrail, I require a status update. How long until the net is online?>>

<p class="MsoNormal">Grandpa Egg activates contrils to lead various Autobots to the proper hull entrances to the ship! THings are getting crazy!

<p class="MsoNormal">F-35B Lightning II <Contrail> is still setting up nets and dodging glue guns and avoiding weird robot things. She thinks that Triggerhappy looks like he is having fun. That is nice. (She is obviously not privy to Triggerhappy's conversation with Blowpipe.) Banshee also seems to be enjoying herself. Shockwave demands a status update. Contrail checks her Setting Up Nets app (only 99 cents from the d-E-cepticon store), which tells her progress on the net business. She reports, <<Ehn, about 90 astreoseconds, my lord.>>

<p class="MsoNormal">Grandpa Egg activates contrils to lead various Autobots to the proper hull entrances to the ship! THings are getting crazy! <<Elita, they have trapped my ship! Get these Decepticons clear! Save the INUCUBATOR! ITS VERY IMPORTANT!>>

<p class="MsoNormal">Giant Armored Bear <Chainclaw> sort of drifts around from the bomb's explosion, completely unsure of how to handle himself in zero gravity. "Blast you, coward! Fight me like a real warrior! Claw to claw! SCHNELL!" He spots Wheelie heading towards them. "Wheelie, turn back! Everything is hopeless here! Even if I survive this battle, I can feel the sickness spreading! We'll all die here!" He waves his paws around for emphasis.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Giant Armored Bear <Chainclaw> takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

<p class="MsoNormal">Elita One scowls to herself as she treks through the inside of the ship. They WOULD just go for the whole ship, despite how armor plated and armed it seems to be. Typical Con mentality... She follows the alerts into the cargo area in a sprint, her cannon at the ready. Fire erupts as she comes across two gumbies dropping in from a higher deck. Stick and move, that was her style, this cramped environ fit to it well...

<p class="MsoNormal">

<p class="MsoNormal">In the cargo hold, she looks over what is most likely this incubator, adds a mine charge to it in a hidden spot, then proceeds. <<Doing what I can, Grandpa. We're working on it.>> She then checks the scanner relay on the shuttle, "Nets...hmm. Good choice, but not without its flaws." The ship shakes from Shockwave's blast. "And that would be Shockwave..." She heads to the rear of the vessel, <<Any Bots available, see what you can do against that net, they usually have nodes you can shoot out. Grandpa, when you get clear, you gun this thing into the atmosphere, all Bots will retreat inside for safety. Understood?>>

<p class="MsoNormal">No sooner than getting in the hatch does Horsepower have gunfire going off around him. The mechanic presses his bulk against the wall briefly, but there's only so much he can do when Triggerhappy just volleys all over the place rebounding off hull plates as much as his armor even around the corner.

<p class="MsoNormal">Fortunately now that they're inside the ship, he's a bit better off. Opening a pair of hip compartments, he pulls a blaster out in each hand, then steps back around the corner as the jet flies in. Both repeaters retort loudly in succession... which turns out to be as much their attack as the noise they make with the disruptive sonic blasts. One even hits and shorts out the door controls, causing the blast doors to slam shut and keep no one else from following the crazy Con in that way.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Horsepower misses Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> with the Horsepower-forged Resonate Repeater attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Skids says to himself, "Nets, got it." He's not on the exterior, or more than notionally equipped for a spacewalk, so he starts heading toward engineering, until he hears the sound of battle between Horsepower and Triggerhappy and walks over to that, his large metal feet clanking all the way down the interiors.

<p class="MsoNormal">Wheelie pokes his head up near one of Chainclaw's feet as he tells Wheelie to get back, before looking up at the nets Contrail is putting up. "Mr. Teddy, you see that net? We have to blast it before it's set!" Looking up as Chainclaw seems to start floating away, Wheelie squints, before looking up at the net, then down at the junk around him. A little lightbulb suddenly goes off.

<p class="MsoNormal">Ducking back under some junk, Wheelie re-appears with a giant length of rubber and a large lampstand. Leaping up and off the ship side, Wheelie lands on Chainclaw's back. "Mr. Teddy, hold this please. Stretch it tight and I'll use it with ease!" Hopefully, if Chainclaw obliges, Wheelie will use the cy-bear like a giant slingshot, and the lampstand as one big flarerock... except it's a lamp...

<p class="MsoNormal">Grandpa Egg has been standing behind Elita One this whole time she's been talking into her wrist. "Sounds like a plan lady!" He waves. A Leia looking robot stands behind him, looking irritated. "Who is THIS, Egg? Why aren't the engines working? Why aren't the cannons working? Why aren't we there yet? Do you think she's prettier than me?"

<p class="MsoNormal">Egg smiles at Elita sheepishly. "Erm... She has a lovely singing voice?"

<p class="MsoNormal">With the freighter's engines now in a state of 'molten slag' and Contrail within a minute and a half of activating the net, Shockwave is growing confident of success. There are still Autobots aboard, and while they may steal back some of the freighter's valuables, the central goal of the Decepticons is still intact. <<Captain, new orders,>> he transmits to the Despoiler's CO, <<Begin bombarding any space-bound Autobots, followed by the Autobot shuttle.>> Grandpa's ship has no engines, and so there's little point in continuing to blast it. Now the main worry is...

<p class="MsoNormal">...the net, and so Shockwave soars over to join Contrail. He takes up a position between the battle and the net itself. Autobots wishing to get to it will have to get past *him*. <<Once the freighter is secure, begin moving the net towards Polyhex,>> he orders Contrail. That app can do anything.

<p class="MsoNormal">Triggerhappy's flight form speeds through the hatch, peppering Horspower with volleys of photons. He watches as the Autobot attempts to avoid the shots by pressing himself up against the wall, however this proved fruitless as the port lead to a tubular entryway that was rather narrow. Not much there in the way of cover.

<p class="MsoNormal">Blowpipe takes note of his partner's velocity, realizing that at the rate he's going, Horsepower's going to have the perfect opportunity to get a shot at him from his left flank. "Triggerhappy, watch your flanks, damn it!" he calls out.

<p class="MsoNormal">"I'm on it, I'm on it, Primus!" He rolls sideways in the air as Horsepower's repeaters whizz harmlessly past his frame and transforms out of his jet form, landing on his feet in the corridor just beyond the hatch he had just entered through and brings Blowpipe around to level it at the Autobot. But then he catches sight of Skids approaching. Blowpipe curses his luck, but Triggerhappy just grins.

<p class="MsoNormal">"I love you /large/ types with the oversized afts, so easy to shoot!" he taunts, his weapon discharging in every imaginable direction.

<p class="MsoNormal">Triggerhappy reverts to his root form.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Triggerhappy strikes Skids with his More targets means more shooting yay! (Full-Auto) Area attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Triggerhappy strikes Horsepower with his More targets means more shooting yay! (Full-Auto) Area attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">JU-87 <Banshee> transforms to float a short distance from Chainclaw, her face covered by a bizarre mask-like device bearing an array of dishes and antennae. She inhales sharply through the mask, the cogs on her neck beginning to spin. It looks, for a moment, like nothing is happening, the Stukacon going through the useless motions of singing in a vacuum.

<p class="MsoNormal">Until one reaises the purpose of the mask; those antennae turn the discordancies of her voice into electromagneti disturbances that have a similar effect - messing with the gyros and warping mechanisms within the paranoid android.

<p class="MsoNormal">"I SCREAM - YOU DIE!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Folding and shifting, Banshee transforms into robot mode.

<p class="MsoNormal">< Combat: Banshee strikes Giant Armored Bear <Chainclaw> with her Banshee Scream attack! [Pulled -2]

<p class="MsoNormal">In space, mass does not matter nearly so much as /momentum/. So it is possible for Contrail to net-tow the ship via the nets. Just very, very slow. Of course, the Setting Up Nets app has an answer to that! These are /gravity/ nets and can be used to cause acceleration.

<p class="MsoNormal">Yeeeaaaahhh!

<p class="MsoNormal"><<As you command, my lord,>> Contrail confirms. Man, Triggerhappy and Banshee are having way too much fun. Where's Astrotrain when you need him?

<p class="MsoNormal">That scream takes Chainclaw back. The people he was sworn to protect be slaughtered. The screaming anguish of dear friends and adopted family. It's enough to take Chainclaw out of the fight. "This...it's all hopeless." Hopefully Wheelie doesn't need a whole lot of cooperation from the bear to do this thing that he wants to do.

<p class="MsoNormal">Skids presses himeslf along one wall of the corridor so he'll have room to shoot past Horsepower. "You been at it for long?" he chit-chats, as he holds out his arm with its built-in liquid-nitrogen cannon, the weapon least likely to damage the equipment in engineering if he misses.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Skids strikes Triggerhappy with his Liquid Nitrogen Rifle attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: You took 12 damage.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: That attack has temporarily impaired Triggerhappy's Agility. (Crippled)

<p class="MsoNormal">Elita One opens up a hatch near the rear of the freighter, taking in the sight with disdain. Her instructions to the Autobot shuttle will send it towards the front of the freighter, most likely taking some damage from the Con forces, but right now it just needed to be moving, as fast as it can maneuver with this crummy 4 credit app from the Bot Store. But for now, there was an assessment to do. The engines were quite damaged, perhaps unworkable. There had to be maneuvering jets still, but the main thrust was possibly out of commission. Up near the back of the netline, that was where the leaders were. And she was here all alone. Bracing herself to a defensive position, then with a practiced motion of resting on one knee, Elita-One takes aim at one of those central nodes for the network. She mutters to herself softly as she bolts out a shot. "That's the problem with networks, when one crashes, the whole thing goes down."

<p class="MsoNormal">These corridors did -nothing- for hindering ballistics it seems. Bullets are flying everywhere, bouncing off his armor and being a major annoyance. But as much as Horsepower would love to keep playing space cowboy, he's got more important things to do.

<p class="MsoNormal">Skids is a perfectly timed arrival though. "Distract 'im." Then turns past the theorist and heads down the corridor as Triggerhappy fires away like a maniac, finally turning and diving into a secondary room.

<p class="MsoNormal">

<p class="MsoNormal">There was no time to get to the main engineering room, but big freighters like this usually had secondary stations so you didn't have to run from one end to the other. Hunking down in the room as best he can he works furiously at the terminals, trying to reprogram whatever weapon systems this hulk has as Elita desires.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Horsepower sets his defense level to Protected.

<p class="MsoNormal">Wheelie taps Chainclaw's shoulder as he seems to just retreat to his own little world. Huffing a little, Wheelie takes the rubber strip and impales it with Chainclaw's clawed hands. Pressing the bear's arms apart to tighten the rubber, Wheelie 'loads' in the lamp stand, tugging it back as far as his little body will let him, before taking careful aim. Probably only a handful of bots could pull off the shoot he's lining up. But with the aid of zero-gravity, it makes trajectory tracking muuuuuuuch easier. "One for the money, the show's on two. Here's a bright idea, coming straight for yooooouuuuu!" he rhymes loudly, before letting the lampstand fly for the node on the net we was aiming for... and hoping it'd hit.

<p class="MsoNormal">While Triggerhappy and Banshee are out having fun, Shockwave and Contrail are trying to get actual /work/ done. A shot zips past Shockwave, striking one of the nodes on the net. The Decepticon quickly traces the direction the bolt came from, and within moments has Elita One's position. The femme is still in the freighter, but that is of no concern for Shockwave. The Decepticon moves forward, presenting himself as a better target while simultaneously cutting down the angle for those still wanting to shoot the net.

<p class="MsoNormal"><<Contrail, deal with Wheelie. I will deter Elita One,>> Shockwave orders. He sets his gun arm to a wide burst. It is unsuitable for sniping a target that's partly hidden behind cover. Instead it is suitable for annihilating the cover, the target, and everything else within a fifty metre radius. Triggerhappy may suddenly get a funny feeling in a moment as Shockwave cuts loose.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Shockwave sets his defense level to Fearless.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Shockwave strikes Elita One with his Wide Beam Blast attack! [Pulled -3]

<p class="MsoNormal">Banshee catches a brief glimpse of Wheelie, the same way the Enterprise D once spotted a cloaked Klingon vessel - when two asteroids collide, there's a brief silhouette against the dust. Transforming but moving extremely slowly, she begins to hunt for the dimintive rhymer.

<p class="MsoNormal">"Come out, come out, wherever you are..."

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Banshee sets her defense level to Guarded.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Banshee takes extra time to steady herself. [Pass]

<p class="MsoNormal">Folding and shifting with the classic noise, Banshee transforms into her Junkers Ju-87 Stuka altmode

<p class="MsoNormal">F-35B Lightning II <Contrail> is told to go deal with Wheelie instead of defending her precious nets. However, she can't find Wheelie. So she's just going to tell Shockwave Elita One's secret weakness: Slenderman blogging.

<p class="MsoNormal">

<p class="MsoNormal">Contrail does a quick flyby pass to get a better picture. There is, of course, a tall, faceless man with tentacles in the photograph, and there always has been.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: F-35B Lightning II <Contrail> sets her defense level to Fearless.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Contrail analyzes Elita One for weaknesses Shockwave can exploit.

<p class="MsoNormal">Triggerhappy is having too much fun shooting at everything to notice Horsepower ducking into another room to try his luck with reprogramming the freighter's weapon systems. Though with the kind of ammo it appeared to have, it probably wouldn't do much good. Blowpipe, however, notices. "Follow him, we need to discern their objectives."

<p class="MsoNormal">But Triggerhappy is busy. "Um, I'm a little busy here, if you hadn't noticed." In other words, he's already having enough fun. Following Horsepower would probably involve stopping his shooting which he'd rather not do. Still, "You want me to turn my back on this other 'Bot I'm gonna need cover fire which I currently don't have the luxury of." When you talk to reasonable types like Blowpipe, you have to sound logical. Triggerhappy knows this.

<p class="MsoNormal">Hence, he continues firing up Skids, but the Autobot lands some liquid N2 on a leg, causing his lower ped servos to freeze up a bit. "Agh! Okay, okay, you're a better shot than your oversized friend, but still not better 'n me!" He fires at Skids with Blowpipe, even as the Nebulan continues arguing.

<p class="MsoNormal">"Then find a way to commandeer this hulking piece of scrap, you're wasting time with these Autobots, they're just trying to distract us!" he groans, though, realizing his partner is right about the cover fire. <<Banshee, you busy? Get Triggerhappy some cover fire, we're going for the bridge.>> the Nebulon says over the comm.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Triggerhappy strikes Skids with his Compressed-Air Cannon attack!

<p class="MsoNormal"><Decepticon> Der Stukacon Banshee says, "I am busy! I think I haff Vheelie."

<p class="MsoNormal">Wheelie needs to get some more ammuniation for his attack on the net, but has to ducking into cover behind... well, Chainclaw, since it's all he's got. Wheelie stops to think for a moment, before pulling out a flarerock from his pouch and looking towards the approaching Banshee. Getting his feet back on Chainclaw's arms, he "wheels" the giant cybear slingshot around to face Banshee's arrival, loading his own ammo into the giant slingshot. It should work just like his regular one... but with much more strength behind it. That should sting pretty good. Pulling back, Wheelie proves he's a master of rhyme by offering to finish Banshee's rhyme for her. "...not to worry, I haven't gone far!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Wheelie appears from the shadows...

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Sneak Attack!!

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Wheelie strikes JU-87 <Banshee> with his Slingshot attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Elita One growls to herself. Her strike caught his notice too early. What with all the hulabaloo she had hoped to have her e-sig get masked for a bit longer. However, Shockwave was a longtime foe of hers, and in truth, she knew better, knew that he could recognize her telltale presence better than even Carnivac. The wound sparked and fuzzed her optics. Some sort of corruption tech. She laughed bitterly, here she was fighting for something she didn't know, for someone she just met against a foe she's faced for what feels like her entire life. Did it matter, if this was the end?

<p class="MsoNormal">She rotates the hatch about before her, for better cover. Did it matter if she died defending a junk peddlar instead of saving Cybertron?

<p class="MsoNormal">....

<p class="MsoNormal">....

<p class="MsoNormal">Of course it didn't matter really, but today wouldn't be her day to die. Ignoring her nemesis for a brief few seconds longer, she fires again, doing her best to disrupt that web. The plan was ready. <<Horsepower>> She hissed, <<Do it.>>

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Elita One sets her defense level to Protected.

<p class="MsoNormal"><Decepticon> Shockwave says, "The net is proving to not be viable. Instead we will have to initiate our backup plan: Kill them all."

<p class="MsoNormal"><Decepticon> Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Jawohl, mein kommandant. Vith pleasure."

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Elita One takes extra time to steady herself. [Pass]

<p class="MsoNormal">Skids rushes for the open room where he isn't so much of a sitting duck. His windshield, set into his chest, cracks under the compressed air, but doesn't shatter, and Skids just hunches down over a bit as he reaches the relative open of the engineering room and pivots to face the reckless robot again. He still doesn't risk firing a missile into the control room of the ship, so he'll try the superfreeze once again.

<p class="MsoNormal"><O-Decepticon> Windshear says, "anyone know if outbound logs in this late or might still at this time?"

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Skids strikes Triggerhappy with his Liquid Nitrogen Rifle attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: That attack has temporarily impaired Triggerhappy's Agility. (Crippled)

<p class="MsoNormal">Hearing the gunfire go on makes Horsepower feel bad for leaving Skids to deal with the lunatic out there, but it was only temporary. He needed to do this. Elita was counting on it, and Skids taking the heat for a bit was appreciated. "Just like firin' a really big cannon," he mutters to himself as the shuttle moves into position as it's flying past and in front of the freighter, and slams his hand down on the main control.

<p class="MsoNormal">As many of the guns as the freighter can get pointed forward fire at once.

<p class="MsoNormal">At the Autobot shuttle??

<p class="MsoNormal">But the guns have been reprogrammed only to fire a concussive energy blast focused at the back of the ship, using the amassed force to give it additional momentum as it hurtles towards the net. Can kinetic propulsion and the damaging attempts at the nodes overcoming the dastardly Decepticon trap?

<p class="MsoNormal">Skids figures he might as well taunt, while he's at it. "Thought you were going to pick on the little guy? Got news: he has buddies."

<p class="MsoNormal">Despite his best efforts in preventing it, Elita One is able to again blast another node. <<The net is proving to not be viable,>> he radios his comrades, <<Instead we will have to initiate our backup plan: Kill them all.>> Shockwave says this as if he were discussing the weather and not ordering the destruction of their enemies. Charging forward towards the freighter, Shockwave abandons trying to protect the net. Autobot sharpshooters are just too capable.

<p class="MsoNormal">As he soars towards the Egg's freighter, he sees it open fire... on the Astoria? It takes Shockwave a brief moment to realize what the Autobots are doing, and by his calculation he believes the freighter, now chugging along at a tremendous speed, can likely bust through the weakened net. It'll be one hell of a light show, though.

<p class="MsoNormal">But that's neither here nor there. The Decepticons still have a chance to ruin the Autobots' day by either killing them all or forcing the ship into Cybertron's atmosphere at such a sharp angle that it disintegrates. Working on that first one, Shockwave is heading straight for Elita One's position, firing more focused x-ray beams now.

<p class="MsoNormal">Contrail's tactical information on this is very useless, but it's the thought that counts.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Shockwave strikes Elita One with his X-Ray Beam (Laser) attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">JU-87 <Banshee> takes the slingshot to the tailplane - the rock blasting clean through the fragile stukacon and causing a fair bit of damage. She snarls loudly, sparking and fizzing for a moment before power is re-routed.

<p class="MsoNormal"><<Arschloch! I haff you now!>> She declares. <<You're turborat-chow!>>

<p class="MsoNormal">Pouring on the power, she uses her odd exoatmospheric manuvering unit to reverse her direction without any other changes. Pouring on the power, she loops around Chainclaw, loosing one of her big quarter-ton Torpedo Ted bombs at the rhyming autobot.

<p class="MsoNormal">It rotates quite gracefully in microgravity, and if it hits, it'll hurt.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: JU-87 <Banshee> misses Wheelie with her 250kg Penetrator Bombs attack!

<p class="MsoNormal"><Decepticon> Contrail says, "Start to get out of the blast radius of the Autobots. I want to drop something on all of them. Let me know when you're a safe distance away."

<p class="MsoNormal"><Decepticon> Der Stukacon Banshee says, "ARCH! Arschloch!"

<p class="MsoNormal"><Decepticon> Shockwave says, "Maneuvering now."

<p class="MsoNormal"><Decepticon> Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Ow ow ow ow!"

<p class="MsoNormal">F-35B Lightning II <Contrail> is so sad over her precious nets! She'll have to destroy the Autobots. Granted, she was going to do that anyway, but now she extra seriously wants to do it. Luckily for Contrail, she also has bombs, which always helps in this sort of situation. She transforms to fling one of said bombs, now that she has radioed the Decepticons and told them to get out of the way.

<p class="MsoNormal">In a transformation that is harder than it looks, Contrail rises up into robot mode.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Contrail has created a bomb: "My Precious Nets"!

<p class="MsoNormal">There is a jolt as the gravity nets fail and Shockwave's voice comes over the comm. Blowpipe is /so/ all over the 'I told so you so', much to Triggerhappy's chagrin. And unfortunately, Banshee is busy with Wheelie and thus cannot provide said cover fire. But now that he's received new orders from both Contrail and Shockwave, that isn't going to stop him.

<p class="MsoNormal">The Targetmaster transforms and banks away from Skids. "Nice knowing ya, even if I didn't even get your name!" he laughs, knowing of the bomb Contrail is about to drop.

<p class="MsoNormal">"Head for the--"

<p class="MsoNormal">"I KNOW, will you just shut your fleshy mouth?"

<p class="MsoNormal">To the control room! And he heads toward the anterior of the freighter. If he can force the ship into a sharp downward course, Cybertron's gravitational pull will catch it and send it into a burning descent toward the planet's surface.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Triggerhappy sets his defense level to Guarded.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Triggerhappy takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Contrail strikes Skids with My Precious Nets's Huge Explosion #11116 Area attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Contrail's My Precious Nets is destroyed!

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Contrail strikes Horsepower with My Precious Nets's Huge Explosion #11116 Area attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Contrail strikes Wheelie with My Precious Nets's Huge Explosion #11116 Area attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Contrail strikes Elita One with My Precious Nets's Huge Explosion #11116 Area attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Contrail strikes Giant Armored Bear <Chainclaw> with My Precious Nets's Huge Explosion #11116 Area attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Giant Armored Bear <Chainclaw> floats in behind Banshee because of lack of storyboarding continuity! "Primus take us all!" He snarls, rearing back and taking a swing with massive clawed paw! Yeah, the spacesuit has big bear claws. DEAL. "Die Decepticon! Feel the pain you've bestowed on so many others! DIE!" But then there's a big explosion so he probably misses. Thanks, space and gravity. For nothing.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Giant Armored Bear <Chainclaw> strikes JU-87 <Banshee> with his SPACE MAULING attack!

<p class="MsoNormal"><Decepticon> Der Stukacon Banshee yelps, alarms audible in the background. "Exo-maneuvering unit... failing... sheis... I haff no control!

<p class="MsoNormal">With the Autobot shuttle hitting the net at one point, the larger but slower freighter isn't far behind, hitting at a different point. And while slower the freighter has a lot more mass to throw into it, the two contrasting forces in different directions tearing apart what was weakened by the damaged nodes.

<p class="MsoNormal">And then explosions! Is that the net blowing up, or Contrail's pyrotechnic temper tantrum? Should explosions like that even work in space? Apparently they do. Space isn't enough to snuff out smoke and flames shooting away like fireworks. But as the hulk of the freigher is still moving, it isn't exactly stopping in moving now. Momentum's a bitch, yo.

<p class="MsoNormal">Unfortunately the bombing run causes the console to explode, the blast throwing Horsepower back out into the corridor with a grunt as he slams into the wall. Groans and shakes his head, looks up just in time to see Triggerhappy running in the opposite direction. He pulls out his repeater again... but its been bent in the blast and crash. "Oh of all the..." With a snarl he gets up, hits the overload on the battery, and with a mighty swing of the arm flings it after Triggerhappy

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Horsepower sets his defense level to Fearless.

<p class="MsoNormal"><Decepticon> Shockwave says, "Are you still able to fight, Banshee?"

<p class="MsoNormal"><Decepticon> Contrail says, "...so I suppose getting you overcharged wouldn't help."

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Horsepower strikes Triggerhappy with the Horsepower-forged Overload Feature attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Horsepower's attack has strange and mysterious effects on Triggerhappy.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: That attack has temporarily affected Triggerhappy's Accuracy. (Blinded)

<p class="MsoNormal"><Decepticon> Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Negative, negative! I am... I haff no control!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Grandpa Egg and his robots run around, securing breakable things. Leia robot chases him around being all naggy and stuff.

<p class="MsoNormal">Skids loses his footing as the ship bucks and shakes. "Horsepower? You there? I'm on him." Now that Triggerhappy is no longer in front of the delicate equipment, but flying through the narrow hall Skids came through, he's more willing to launch a missile. So that's just what he does.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Skids strikes Triggerhappy with his Missile Launcher attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Her cannon sparks wildly...its useless now. Scrapped beyond repair. Dizzy, smouldering and blasted back down the inside tunnel. <<I'm shutting...down, team...Keep the ship moving, re-entry. it's all we have now. Just...just do what you can, alright?" Elita-One sags as she reaches the third interior corridor. <<We get to Retoris, we get to safety, even if we crash.>> She shakes her head, one of her optics goes out as she does. Staggering, she continues in further...or was it back towards the airlock? <<I just...I just need to...>> Woosy and confused, she slumps to the floor of the maintenance tunnel, forced into stasis by the damage.

<p class="MsoNormal"><Decepticon> Triggerhappy says, "I'm--kkk--heading for the bridge. I'm gonna try to steer this thing into the ground. Or arm a self-destruct or something. I don't know. I'll figure it out when I get there."

<p class="MsoNormal">JU-87 <Banshee> snarls as her bomb misses Wheelie, turning to try and catch Chainclaw with her wing-guns when those claw rip through her hull. And, more importantly, one of the cables controlling her belly-rockets, jamming it open. The Autobot has just enough time to see, even with the oxygen masks, her pilot and gunner holograms sag slightly, with an 'oh, crap' expression, before the Stukacon goes blasting off towards the asteroids, pinwheeling on uneven thrust and struggling to get back under control.

<p class="MsoNormal"><<MAYDAY!>>

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: JU-87 <Banshee> begins retreating, leaving herself vulnerable to parting shots from Shockwave and Giant Armored Bear <Chainclaw>

<p class="MsoNormal"><Decepticon> Der Stukacon Banshee says, "MAYDAY!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Wheelie kicks off of Chainclaw just in time for the Torpedo Ted to glide past him and for the Terrible Teddy to claw up Banshee. Wheelie ducks his way back into the junk piles, before hearing Elita One fizzle out and seeing Shockwave approach the ship. This looked like a job for... Rodimus or Magnus, but since they weren't around and everyone else was busy and the ship was exploding... really? Did it really leave just Wheelie to deal with motherfuggin' Shockwave?

<p class="MsoNormal">Whether it did or not, Shockwave had to be drawn off, somehow. Wheelie hopped back up from his hiding as he sped his way towards Elita's presumed hiding spot. "I've had enough of your stupid stuff, does playing rough make you think you're tough! Well how about I rebuff your scruff and send you packing, slagged-up snuff!" Wheelie whips out his slingshot and another flarerock as he took aim and launched it at Shockwave.

<p class="MsoNormal">Watch out for the little ones...

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Wheelie strikes Shockwave with his Slingshot attack!

<p class="MsoNormal"><Decepticon> Der Stukacon Banshee sighs. "I am back under control. "A crate of fine pre-ark aged brandygon for ze vun who brings me back to Earth."

<p class="MsoNormal">And there's no further shots coming from Elita One's position. Either she's moved out of sight, or she's dead. Shockwave has seen this far too many times to hope for the latter. As his arm cannon recharges from the last two blasts, Shockwave reaches Grandpa Egg's incredibly damaged freighter. <<Decepticons, I am attempting to redirect the freighter into an uncontrolled descent through the atmosphere,>> he radios. The freighter has just ripped through the net, and so the Decepticons are satisfied with destroying the ship if needed.

<p class="MsoNormal">As he presses his hand against the ship's hull, preparing to punch a hole through it, a flarerock flies in his direction. Was Elita just faking it, biding her time? Shockwave wonders. In a split-second before impact, he realizes it isn't Elita One but instead the meddlesome insect Wheelie. The flarerock strikes Shockwave's chest and explodes, sending a stunned Shockwave drifting through space.

<p class="MsoNormal">Banshee has disconnected.

<p class="MsoNormal"><Decepticon> Contrail says, "...sigh. I suppose that I should retrieve the Lord Commander."

<p class="MsoNormal">Triggerhappy is getting shot up left and right. Er, rather, shot up in the aft mostly, as he is flying away from the Autobot toward the front of the freighter and hopefully where the main control room is. It's almost everything he can do to resist the urge to stop and just go back to shooting them. But the objective. If the Decepticons couldn't have this Primus-forsaken scrapheap, then no one would. And the Autobots and their pathetic merchant friends would die with it.

<p class="MsoNormal">Well, okay that was mostly Blowpipe thinking there, but hey the Nebulon is like part of him so he can't just disregard it. There is a large door at the end of the corridor he's flying down that has some sort of security pad next to it. It looks very ram-able. So he flies right into it, smashing through and into the freighter's main control room. Once inside, he searches for anything resembling navigation controls or, maybe a big red button somewhere that just screams 'self-destruct'. If a self-destruct even exists. Will Skids and Horsepower be fast enough to stop him before he takes control of the ship?

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Triggerhappy sets his defense level to Protected.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Triggerhappy takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

<p class="MsoNormal"><Decepticon> Triggerhappy says, "Uh-huh, yeah, you'd better do that, Contrail."

<p class="MsoNormal">Contrail, long suffering (at least today), transforms and flies off to try to retrieve Shockwave, who just got trumped by Wheelie. Why is it that she and Shockwave always have baffling space adventures? oh well, at least this one did not involve Quintessons.

<p class="MsoNormal">Flipping into a modified F-35B Lightning II, the sky is not the limit.

<p class="MsoNormal">Chainclaw has disconnected.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: F-35B Lightning II <Contrail> strikes Shockwave with her Grab attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Well, that's -some- problems taken care of, but still the matter of that stupid Targetmaster still running around. Muttering several choice things best not heard under his breath. "Go find 'Lita and the thingawhatever," he mutters to Skids, and then Horsepower is storming down the corridor after Triggerhappy.

<p class="MsoNormal">Shame by the time he catchs up to the door to the control room, the Targetmaster is already poking around the controls. Hell and damnation. Well, he is a tow truck, salvaging wrecks is kind of what he does.

<p class="MsoNormal">Pulling out one of his chains, Horsepower steps into the room and flings it at Triggerhappy, trying to hook the Con and yank him away from the controls before its too late.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Horsepower strikes Triggerhappy with his Get Over Here attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Wheelie sets his defense level to Protected.

<p class="MsoNormal">Wheelie seems slightly surprised that he actually managed to knock Shockwave back. Well, that was... stunningly effective. Wheelie was expecting a bit more trouble when dealing with Shockwave, but then again, can't argue with results. It's likely the lack of gravity is what helped him, but still...!

<p class="MsoNormal">Wheelie had little time to be concerned about that. Elita One was still inside and this ship was about to get to know the planet very personally, so Wheelie had to go after her. Slipping underneath a layer of junk, Wheelie slinks his way ahead to the airlock to get to Elita inside... staying hidden juuuuuuuust in case...

<p class="MsoNormal">Skids is as surprised as anyone to see Triggerhappy stop and transform. What's he up to, and are those the controls. "Horsepower, you coming or staying?" He makes a snap decision: better to risk a short than let Triggerhappy do whatever he was planning. "Oh no you don't," scowls Skids, as he fires his other arm to hold the targetmaster in check.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Skids misses Triggerhappy with his Electron Blaster attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Triggerhappy is scouring the room for the controls he is looking for. He's spotted what look like navigation controls but he isn't exactly a skilled pilot or anything, so he was attempting to figure out how to force the ship downward with Blowpipe yelling into his audio receptors when a chain is suddenly flung at him and hooks itself onto his arm. Seriously, a big red 'blow this place to the afterspark' button would have been better. At any rate, there is a strong pull that jerks him away from the controls, and he drops his Targetmaster weapon onto the console. It transforms into an exo-suited Blowpipe, who begins pushing the navigation levers downward the best he can. High-energy electrons blast at Triggerhappy from Skids, but the shot somehow doesn't hit home, despite the fact that the Decepticon has been caught in Horsepower's chains.

<p class="MsoNormal">"Owwww!" Triggerhappy cries as the chains yank on his arm. "Lemme go!" he struggles, attempting to punch the large Autobot in the face.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Triggerhappy sets his defense level to Aggressive.

<p class="MsoNormal">Shockwave is caught by Contrail before he can drift too far away. Raising his hand to his head, Shockwave clears the static that was running through his mind from the impact. <<Nnn... the Autobots are still putting up a fight,>> he comments to Contrail. No, he doesn't thank her for the assist. The net is ruined, the freighter's engines are mostly gone, and the Despoiler and Astoria are still battling it out. This could have gone better. <<I calculate the odds of taking the shuttle before it enters Iacon's weapons range is 13.5%. Thus, our most logical course of action...>>

<p class="MsoNormal">Shockwave reconfigures, arms and legs clamping together. <<...is to simply destroy it and all Autobots on board!>> Shockwave fires a trio of blasts, each one causing the massive freighter to shake violently. Those inside might be knocked clear off their feet unless they're holding onto something. <<Decepticons, abandon the frieghter and send it into Cybertron's atmosphere! Let it burn up on re-entry.>>

<p class="MsoNormal">Shockwave's legs combine as his back unfolds. A wide, silver barrel appears out of subspace and connects to his arms, completing his transformation into ray gun mode.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Triggerhappy strikes Horsepower with his Flailing punch (Punch) attack!

<p class="MsoNormal">Skids is just starting to speculate, "Maybe we can pilot--" when the front panel of the spaceship disintegrates, and the viewscreen shatters into pieces. The atmosphere is rushing out, until the shuttle hits atmosphere, and then, slowly at first, it's rushing in. Neither he nor anyone else needs to say: get out of there! He radios, "Astoria! We need a flyby the nose!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Skids doesn't get knocked all over the room, this time, but only because he's magnetized his feet.

<p class="MsoNormal">Combat: Skids takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

<p class="MsoNormal">Horsepower doesn't loose his footing thanks to the wide base of stability his huge feet give him, but the ship shaking as more explosions go off does distract him long enough for Triggerhappy to suckerpunch him. With a grunt his head snaps to the side with a *CLANG*... and then turns it back slowly to glare at Triggerhappy as he spits some oil out of the corner of his mouth at the floor. "Sounds like they're gonna just drop you with the ship." And he drops Triggerhappy on the deck, all but forgotten as he turns away.

<p class="MsoNormal">"Skids, get the shutt--ya already are. Good mech. Wheelie's got Elita, the old man was near her. Ah'll meetcha in a moment." Even as he's replying he's turning to run out of the room. "Gonna go grab that thing everyone's been so up and bothered in gettin'."

<p class="MsoNormal">The Despoiler moves, keeping pace with the Astoria as it launches broadside after broadside at its Autobot counterpart, but ultimately there's nothing the Decepticon pirate ship can do to prevent the Bot shuttle from carrying out Skids's plan. Shockwave eventually calls the warship off, concerned that the Despoiler might get caught up with the freighter's demise. The laser gun maintains his position, firing another series of blasts to rip out the remaining maneuvering thrusters on the ship. The freighter is starting to glow bright orange...

<p class="MsoNormal">Skids is holding a conversation with the shuttle, waving a beweaponed arm Triggerhappy's way if he looks like he's not going to be sensible. "Wheelie made it, and he brought Elita with him! Remind me not to complain the next time he rhymes 'breath' with 'death!' Okay, we've got to jump in three, two, ONE!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Fortunately waaaaay back at the beginning of all this Grandpa Egg had been kind enough to subtly mark the way to the cargo hold containing the Incubator, so it doesn't take Horsepower long to find it. Likely passing Wheelie, Elita and the old timer in the process of, and directing them to were the shuttle was coming to pick them up.

<p class="MsoNormal">Then into the hold itself, taking a moment to use his weapon expertise to gingerly deactivate Elita's precausionary boobytrap, and grabs the whole cobntraption by the base and hoists it up. Servos strain some from various wear-down he took during the fight and explosions, but you can't deter a determined Autobot.

<p class="MsoNormal">He doesn't bother stop as he catchs up to the others, needing to extra momentum to make the jump with his load. "This darn thin' better be worth it all!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Shockwave's comm messages are heard by the Targetmaster and his Nebulan partner. Thankfully, Horsepower lets him go after he succeeds in landing a punch to his face, and Triggerhappy doesn't hesitate to transform, grab Blowpipe, and book it out of a hole that has formed thanks to the burning outer hull and Skids' stray shot.

<p class="MsoNormal">However, not before Blowpipe finally finds the big red button. Why -not- make sure the Autobots would -never- be able to salvage this thing? (And also make sure it doesn't happen to land on Polyhex or somewhere.) Alarms sound off throughout the freighter, warning everyone inside and around that the vessel would detonate in no less than fifty astroseconds. Triggerhappy speeds away, hoping to get out of the blast radius in time.

<p class="MsoNormal">Skids demagnetizes his soles and takes a leap of faith through the hole in the hull. The shuttle had better be there to catch him, or he'll be testing whether a laser core can survive a fall from orbit.

<p class="MsoNormal">Laser Gun <Shockwave> transforms back into robot mode, watching from afar as the freighter careens into the atmosphere. Its port engine is torn off by the atmosphere, having never been designed for such stress. There's no saving the ship now, and Shockwave suspects even those on board have only a slim chance of survival. <<Return to the Despoiler. The freighter's fate has been sealed,>> Shockwave orders. Activating his rocket boots, he soars back towards the Decepticon pirate ship as it breaks off in its fight with the Astoria Carlton-Ritz.

<p class="MsoNormal">Shockwave's handle separates into legs as his barrel splits into arms. Straightening out, he completes his transformation into robot mode.

<p class="MsoNormal">The Despoiler breaking off its fighting instead of pursuing gives the Astoria just enough of a tiny window to turn around and sweep by for the Autobots. Hopefully everyone makes the jump on the first go, because there's not going to be any second tries!

<p class="MsoNormal">Shockwave has no way of affecting whether the Autobots live or die at this point. They're far out of range. But as he enters through one of the Despoiler's side hatches, he is able to monitor their progress on one of the viewscreens. Don't throw the line. C'mon, don't throw it.

<p class="MsoNormal">F-35B Lightning II <Contrail> did not expect thanks from Shockwave. He isn't that sort of Decepticon. He is, however, excellent at destroying things, so there is that. Contrail just gets out of his way while he goes to town.

<p class="MsoNormal">Triggerhappy just barely makes it back to the Despoiler before the self-destruct goes off, the freighter blowing itself to many small pieces of debris about three-quarters the way down through the atmosphere to the surface of the planet. The Targetmaster watches as it is blown to oblivion. "Ha! That's what they get for siding with the Auto-bums."

<p class="MsoNormal">He absently wonders if the merchant owner of the ship had managed to get out in time...

<p class="MsoNormal">But Horsepower is still holding onto the stupid thing in his arms.

<p class="MsoNormal">Fortunately his crane is on his shoulder, so he turns and shoots it like a hookshot after Skids. Look ma, no hands!

<p class="MsoNormal">Skids grabs and holds on for dear life. He swings, an involuntary pendulum, as the Astoria banks toward Retoris. And that gives him a moment to look down. "Whoa," he says. "Never seen Cybertron like this before."

<p class="MsoNormal">Once Horsepower gets a chance to set the Incubator down he grabs his towline and reels Skids back in, just in time for the shuttle to close hatch and bank around to head towards the city below. "And hopefully ya won't have to again."

<p class="MsoNormal">Skids watches the cinders of the ship shower down around, and then behind him. "So, that was your ship?" he asks the Egg. "Hope it was insured. I'm Skids. You already been introduced to these guys?"

<p class="MsoNormal">