Reports and Ra-Tards

Trypticon Training Room This stark, spacious chamber is well-reinforced and shielded to stand up to the strain of many practice bouts. A training drone stands in one corner of the room, ready for a workout. The walls are sheathed in protective alloys that house sensors and cameras to project to the shielded monitors, allowing the combatants to observe their fight and progress. Off to the side are a few seats for spectators to observe the combatants and let out a cheer or two.

Windshear walks in and looks around to check out the new (well to him) training room on Tryptycon. He doesnt notice Backfire.

Backfire doesn't notice Windshear either, and for that matter.. doesn't notice anything! The Seeker simpleton is sitting at a console, slumped over and enjoying a rest cycle. His flattop is sitting on the keys, rendering the screen.. ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

Windshear hears some odd little sound suddenly and looks around for it. Shortly he finds the source, Backfires face typing fffffffffffffff on the computer. With a grin he walks over to the snoozing seeker,

"Hey, Backfire, waks up. Your ffffing all over the place." the dead black seeker says close to Backfires facing Audio.

"What??" Backfire shouts, startled. Jumping up from his seat, the Seeker points his shoulder-mounted laser rifle around erratically. "Bots in the bushes, WHERE?!?" Optics shift uneasily about, finally blinking a couple times and reactivating logic circuits.. if any are left.

It's likely the last two are in perpetual civil war with eachother.

Turning to regard Windshear, Backfire’s face has the ’f’ key lodged in it. Retaking his seat, the Seeker stares at the screen dumbfounded. "What did you do to my report, Fake Windshear???"

Windshear leans back and raises an optic ridge, "I am not /fake/ Windshear. I /am/ Windshear. I just went back to my original colors..." oh yea he got his voice fixed but he doesnt say that. Instead he looks at the screen, "I didnt do that. Looks like you had your head really into that report though.." then he chuckles. "backspace them out..." duhhh

"LIKELY STORY, IMPOSTER!" Backfire grumbles, his index finger hovering over the backspace button. Jabbing at it furiously, like a parrot pecking at it's foodstuffs, the Seeker manages to fill the chamber with the tapping of a single key.


 * TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP*

Pausing for a moment, Backfire turns in his seat. "Oh yeah? Explain your recent paint.. oh wait, you just did. HRMPH!!" *TAP* *TAP* *TAP*

"Aha!" Backfire exclaims, turning around again. "Explain where you've been this whole time.. and why you now sound like a femme?!?"

Windshear stares at him and just listens. Then a wing twitches, "The bots in the bushes did it." he mumbles then, "Wait -- I do not sound like a femme! Look --" and he points to a fine lined scar across his throat, "I got my voice synth replaced, but high pitched femme sound is nothing of the sort."

He grabs a nearby chair and moves it over, sitting down in it. "Where was I? Outer sector patrol -- sudden orders and I had to leave before I could tell anyone where I was going."

"HRMPH! The Windshear I knew, the darling apprentice with a voice synth like a garbage pail of refuse and rocks, would have stolen the time from.. uhh, a clock. Then like, told me." Backfire growls out, still hard at work on his report.


 * TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP*

"And you soooooooooooooooooo, sound like a femme."

Windshear stares at him and then laughs, "Id still steal the time from.. a clock and then go sell it to the highest bidder on the free trade lanes...and.. I do not sound like a femme..." As he says that last sentences he drops hsi voice down painfully low. (yea manson /can/ go wicked low tone).

"Therefore, the only REASONABLE explanation as to WHO you are.." Backfire trails, actually turning in his seat to look at Windshear. "Is a devious imposter, no doubt Unicron reborn.. or a Quintesson.. or maybe an Autobot." the Seeker rages, still deleting the 'f's from his report.


 * TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP*

"Or maybe you're just imaginary, a part of my subliminal GENIUS! Only, I'm projecting you so other people can see it as well. Yes, that is the likely cause."

What's that in the doorway? It moves furtively, so if one were to glance back at the door, it would no longer be seen. The edges of the training room are shadowy. Something spiky this way comes!

Windshear frowns then reaches into a forwarm compartment, pulls out his usual enercig and lights it. Then he takes a long pull off of it and blows it out toward the computer screen. "Is it my color, or my voice or both that make you think Im not Windshear?"

"HA, I KNEW YOU WOULD DO THAT!" Backfire shrieks, jumping up in his chair. "I JUST THOUGHT ABOUT YOU SMOKING, AND WAH-LA!!" the Seeker laughs, running a circle around Windshear. "HAHAHAHAHA, I AM A SUBLIMINAL GENIUS!"

Stepping on a polishing rag left out on the floor, the idiot slips and falls on his face. *THUD* "OUCH!"

His optic catches a tiny bit of motion on the outskirts of the room, however. "Fake Windshear, my PERIPHERAL-SENSES are tingling!" he comments, moving his hands above his head and wiggling them like spirit fingers.. still laying on the ground.

Windshear startles a bit when Backfire humps up and runs around him. Then its all he can do to keep from cracking up when the goof slips and falls. "Its just your face, Backfire." Windshear says dryly, "Its not a vital organ.. unlike some seekers in here." and he gives a smug sniff, "And somethign tingling on you is TMI..."

"TMI.. unknown acronym, perhaps I've injured my subliminal genius." Backfire sulks, getting up to his haunches. Remaining on the ground, he gives Windshear a once over right quick.

"So, you were gone doing what now? I wasn't listening."

Windshear works on his cig for a moment. "I was sent off on patrol in some dregged area of space. I guess I upset someone in high command." He shrugs, "Not that Im that interestd really." he looks back at Backfire looking him over.

"Yes, Backfire it is me. The one and only Windshear." he smirks.

"Prove it!" Backfire shouts, getting to his feet and slumping back in his chair. "Say something that no inferior copy would hope to know!"

Windshear thinks for a moment, running a fang over his lower lip. "You remember when we were on that one planet --" he waves a dissmissve hand, "Dont ask me the name of it.. I didnt care. And those bug creatures were attacking us? I transformed into jet mode and blasted them with my afterburners while you held me in place and aimed?"

"I WOULD NEVER TOUCH YOU IN SUCH AN INAPPROPRIATE MANNER!!" Backfire shouts loud enough for everyone else inside of Trypticon to hear, even though he remembers -exactly- what Windshear is talking about.

There's a bit of a juvenile snicker in the shadows. It sounds like "hee!"

Windshear blinks and leans back a bit from the vocal outburst from Backfire, "I never said you did!" he pauses trying to think of something else to say that will convince backfire hes who he is.

Windshear suddenly pulls out an F15 tailfin from his subspace pocket.. "Air Raids...you should know about this, right? OH yea and I have a sub-space monster in my pocket thanks to Catechisn and her .. buckets..,"

"Such a futile attempt, my dear imposter." Backfire cackles, still trying to clean up his report.


 * TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP* *TAP*

"You'll have to do MUCH better than that.." the Seeker trails, stopping in his task and craning his neck around. "Psssst, did you hear laughing?" he whispers all quiet like.

Windshear looks around, "I wasnt paying attention..." he pauses for a beat then, "I am loyal to the Best Air Commander we ever had, even in his death and much to the annoyance of just about eeryone else in the Empire."

"I'm not dead!" Backfire shouts.

Windshear's mouth drops open, "Not you! STARSCREAM!" and his voice goes up into a shriek eerily not that far off /from/ Starscreams at that. O_O

A voice in the room says, "HIM NO SHALL BE NAMED!"

"Oh, him." Backfire sulks a bit, finally having deleted all the fs from his report. "Gah, you'd have to be a moron or Windshear to say that out lou.. OH HAI!!" the Seeker exclaims, wide optic'd and looking at the grey and black Seeker.

"It -is- you!"

Windshear looks around at the voice, "There is someone else in here--" he looks back at Backfire and grins, "Told you ti was ME! So how you been? Its been a while since Ive been around here."

"Promoted, demoted, promoted, Galvacannon'd.. it's a cruel circle of existence." Backfire growls out, typing away ala the hunt and peck method.. he's no formal training in typing.

"Yeah, I think it's a ghost." the Seeker casually states, "WAIT.. WHAT IF IT'S STARSCREAM'S GHOST???" he shrieks, jumping behind Windshear. "I don't want to get possessed!!"

The voice EEEKS! "Ghost? Where? No see ghost!"

"AN INVISBLE STARSCREAM GHOST THAT CAN'T EVEN SEE ITSELF!!!" Backfire shouts.

Windshear was listening to Backfire and then suddenly being his shield against an imgainary ghost. He smirks slowly, "No its not Starscream's Ghost. this I kno-- wait that sentence structure sounds familiar...." he stands up instantly destroying backfires cover and starts walking toward the voice.

"NO, DON'T LEAVE ME TO DIE!!!" Backfire cries out, diving to grab ahold of Windshear's feet.. which will probably trip him.

Combat: Backfire strikes Windshear with his Scared Hug! (Grab) attack!

"Who dying?" the voice says again. But then there's a dark seeker crashing towards him...

Slugfest says, "EEEEEEEEEEEE!""

Windshear suddenly finds his feet pinned and the floor kisses his canopy with a lout THUNK. Static dance across his optis for just a second and then he looks back over an intake and wing at the frantic Seeker, "Well... I cant keep you from dying if you wont let me go!"

"TAKE HIM FIRST, EVIL HOARD OF HOTHGART'S GHOST!" Backfire screams.. inching away to hide underneath the console, peering out. "Psssssst, are you dead yet?"

certainly knocked over!"
 * CLUNK* Something gets crushed under Windshear! Well maybe not crushed, but

There's a scrambling noise and suddenly "OFF OFF OFF OFF OFF OFF OFF!"

Windshear feels something squirming underneath him as he feels Backfire let him go. He lifts himself up off the floor and looks down. Then he starts laughing, "Heres you big bad ghost, Backfire...Slugfest...and no Im NOT DEAD YET!"

"Whew." Backfire exclaims, getting out from underneath the console. "Not that your death is any less important, but I am glad we are not visted by nocturnal necropheliac spirits this night."

Taking his seat again, Backfire resumes typing on his report.

"You no look dead..." Slugfest starts, then he stares up at Windshear. "Wait. Look dead! EEEE WINDSHEAR ISH GHOST!" His little feets start pawing helplessly as he's on his side, but all he succeeds in doing is going around in a circle.

Windshear frowns and then realizes whas going on and he starts laughing. He cant help it, but he looms over Slugfest suddenly as he shuts off his optics for a moment, "Maaaaaayyybbeee I ammmmm"

Slugfest utters the most terrified squeal and starts spinning around on the floor even faster.

"Windshear, please don't scare the help." Backfire beckons over his shoulder, still busy clacking away on the keyboard.

Windshear flashes his optics back on and reaches down picking sluggy up. "Its just me silly." he says and then looks back at Backfire. "But its so much fun. I forgot how much I enjoyed my build colors."

"It's just a repaint, MO-RON!" Backfire laughs, finishing up the report and shutting off the computer console. "Any idiot with half a wit and a can of paint could have done the same!"

Windshear folds his arms, "Bu build colors are different...special. These are mine. I tried colors for awhile but got bored wtih it.. what can I say.." he shrugs.

Slugfest pokes at Windshear with a front foot. "No is crumbling," he says. Windshear looks down at slugfest, "No Im not crumbling." he smirks, "Just my colors, Sluggy, dont be afriad."

Slugfest taps the leg a few more times to make sure it's not congealed ash that would fall apart at any second.

"Dude, ugh.. if it wasn't for me!" Backfire glares at Windshear, standing from his seat and walking towards the other Seeker. "I swear to Primus, you'd be lost.. LOST!"

Offering out an energon goodie, Backfire downs one himself.

Suddenly, Backfire begins choking on his snack. "ACK, ACK, ACK.. HELP, MEDICAL!!" he shouts, stammering out the door and running up a flight of stairs.. even though he's pratically right next door to the repair facilities.

Windshear looks up at Backfire, "Lost? --" he watches the suddden fit and then looks at Sluggy, "He really does live life on his own frequency doesnt he?"