Plan B, Phase One

Amazon River Basin

Though vastly depleted from what it once was, the tropical rain forests of South America still claim a vast and seemingly impenetrable stretch of land. Unfortunately, that stretch of land is shrinking quickly, and the jungle is being metamorphosed into one of concrete and steel. The rain now patters on oxygenating towers and chemical plants. Oil wells replace trees, chemists and workers replace tribes and animals. The remaining true forest is owned by various eco-groups and individuals interested in seeing it preserved.

Obvious exits: North &lt;N&gt; leads to Trinidad Oil Fields. Northwest &lt;NW&gt; leads to Panama Canal. Southeast &lt;SE&gt; leads to Brazil. Southwest &lt;SW&gt; leads to Andes Mts.. East &lt;E&gt; leads to Southwest Atlantic.

Fly &lt;Up&gt;

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee, with the sound of a pneumatic wrench in the back ground, says, "Ouch! Vatch it! Ach, I look like some kind of hussie vith this sheiss on..."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "If I catch anyone from the Aerial Korps with photograps or images of me lik this ZERE WILL BE CONSEQUENCES. I'm not ome fetischy hure!"

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Rumble says, "Who was sayin' you was a fatty she-whore?!"

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Nobody. But I'm being fitted with.. ugh... cropdusting gear for a mission."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Rumble says, "Aw, I seen this one Junkion who had that stuff, it made me sick! It was like, a stupid lacy bonnet an' this sword made a' feathers for gently /touchin'/ stuff... Humans, man."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Not zat kind of dusting, numbnuts. crop spraying."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Fusillade says, "Booty dust!"

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Rumble says, "Aw, yeah, Booty Dust, I remember that club!"

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Agh..."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Wiretap says, "Hubcap, are you listening to my comm frequencies again?"

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Wiretap says, "I'm detecting a signal that is tiny, yellow, and useless. I am ninety-nine point nine nine nine percent certain it is not, in fact, Bumblebee."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Contrail says, "Ugh, Hubcap. Quick, everyone, start discussing how Blot smells."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Hubcap says, "Must be Bumper."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Wiretap says, "Hrn. My estimates did not include Autobot desginated "Bumper" as a possibility, revising extrapolations."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Did whoever designed this rig fit it with a quick release? Mein bomben are stored right now, beacause it's in ze vay"

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Rumble says, "Wait! I had a whole list'a Blot jokes!"

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Contrail says, "Proceed with your Blot jokes, Rumble."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Rumble says, "Aw, don't tell me the file's corrupted-- probably from how bad even /jokes/ about him reek--"

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Wiretap says, "Banshee, your flight plan for Eurasian fly-over is being transmitted."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "I haff it, taking off."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "It has me crossing a major EDC fortification with heavy anti-air capacity... I'm not designed for

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Wiretap says, "Suggest you fly faster."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Send ein seeker there. I'm a slow bomber."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Hubcap's disguised voice suggests "Keep calm, and carry on."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Or re-route it."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Wiretap says, "Rerouting via Indian sub-continent approved."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Danke. I'll run down Purple Route 3, throw them off mein target. They'll think I'm after Deli, not Kamchatka."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Wiretap has encrypted this channel.

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Encryption key recieved and entered. Com check com check"

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Wiretap says, "Are you already OVER the target zone, Banshee?"

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Off course."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Wiretap says, "Autobot "Hubcap" intercepted my two-way transmission to you."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Ja, I gathered. Added disinformation."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Wiretap says, "Yes. Except he heard the part where I had to explain my duplicity to you directly, rendering the entire exercise moot."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "...arschloch."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Well, I didn't transmit my actual target, so all they know is that it's not Eurasia. Still leaves both Americas, Afrika unt Oceana."

You drop Insecticon Clone Pods.

Blurr has arrived.

Contrail is out in the heart of the Amazon rainforest, where it is currently raining. There are at least tent species of undiscovered insects swarming over her metal plating, and an implausibly large boa constructor is climbing on one of her wings. She grumbles, "Slagging Earth. Won't be a day too soon when we finally snap and just decide to level the place with orbital bombardment."

Contrail trudges over to a series of very large crates and breaks one open. Inside, there is an Insecticon clone pod! Bury it, give it some time to mature, and a vicious, voracious eating machine will emerge! They aren't as useful as real Insecticons, but when the objective is simply to lay waste to vegetative matter, smarts and skill are not required. There ought to be some backup coming soon, Contrail hears over the radio...

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Wiretap says, "Encryption is unlikely to be maintained under persistent brute-force decryption."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Ja, getting interference."

JU-87 &lt;Banshee&gt; arrives on time from the North, low and fast. She's got the bulky crop-spraying equipment slung under her belly, bolted to her bomb-mountings. She slows drastically as she reaches the target zone, radioing Contrail.

&lt;&lt;Ready to begin drop. Tell me where you want it.&gt;&gt;

Armored Car Carrier &lt;Ultra Magnus&gt; drives along through the rain forest, through the tropical flora and fauna, somehow not destroying the area despite being a massive armored heavy thing. Cartoons! "Hubcap, while I don't typically operate on 'hunches,' finding them far too dependent on guesswork, gut feelings, and sixth senses, I've found yours to be exactly where the money is, which I believe is the correct human expression. Whatever mischief these Decepticons are up to, I'd suggest we bring it to a swift halt for our EDC allies."

Hubcap shakes his head and runs a hand over his face as he uses the other to keep a tight hold. "I'm telling you, Boss, it's not a hunch, it's information received!" Then he frowns and mutters quietly to himself as he tries to decipher the 'Cons' encryption. "Trying to recive more."

"Aaaaaaand, for the tenth cycle running, BLURR is the recipient of the Ibex Cup, breaking the planet-wide record previously set by the great Fasttrack..." While Ultra Magnus might be somehow avoiding destroying the vegetation despite being a giant armored transfer truck, the same could not be said about Blurr. Racing through the rainforest, Blurr is pretty much flattening just about anything and everything in his way and then some thanks to the sonic booms. A very distinct path of foliage plastered to the ground can be seen from the air. No doubt the speedster had gotten carried away with thoughts of his repeated victories before the war. Unfortunately, this made his presence quite obvious to just about anyone. But then again, when did Blurr ever want to hide? Anyway, at the rate he's going, he's going to crash right into Ultra Magnus' trailer.

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "CONTACT!"

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Ground target, supersonic and coming this way"

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Contrail deadpans. "Gee. How many of those are there?"

Contrail has to transmit the drop patterns to Banshee over the radio, so unbeknownst to Contrail, Hubcap probably also knows the drop pattern plans now, too. For now, she just works on breaking the crates open, getting the pods ready for burial... but they have incoming. Time is going to be short!

JU-87 &lt;Banshee&gt; begins her run, cranking up the speed to try and drop this shit so she can ditch the spraying rig and fight. She drops lower and begins to spray the maturation catalyst, a mist of fine purple powder that clings to -EVERYTHING- it touches.

&lt;&lt;CONTACT! Ground target, supersonic and coming this way!&gt;&gt; she radios, trying to fly the grid pattern as fast as possible. It's not going to be the best dusting job in the world, but it should be enough!

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee sighs wistfully "I vish zis was napalm."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Contrail says, "Don't we all."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Hubcap's heavily disguised voice says "Perhaps you should talk to Mixmaster?" With any luck he'll melt you.

"Just keep me updated, Hubcap- we wouldn't want the Decepticons to catch us unawa- what the?!" Magnus gets sprayed in weird purple dust spray. &lt;&lt;Blurr, watch yourself! We have incoming!&gt;&gt; "It...doesn't seem corrosive... We'll have to press forward, Autobots! Keep rolling!" He puts the pedal down, accelerating down the naturally occurring massive truck sized path in the rain forest.

Hubcap, being a passenger within Magnus, manages to avoid the purple dust. "Doing my best, Big Blue, so far, umm, it's not napalm, the 'Cons seem kinda disappointed about that."

Blurr was just having a splendid time plowing over all those trees, that is until a strange purple-colored dust floats down from the skies and Ultra Magnus is suddenly barking at him over the comm... Speaking of Magnus, he has just realized that the other Autobot is dead ahead of him, and he is about to collide with him at a 45 degree angle. "Primuswhatthewreck?!" he cries out as he quickly transforms and skids to a stop millimeters away from slamming into his superior officer.

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Tell me when I've got enough coverage and I can drop this piece of sheiss"

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Contrail says, "Drop 'em. We have bigger worries than coverage, if the Autobots know we're here. We'll need to protect these Insecticon Clone Pods."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Jawohl, dropping."

JU-87 &lt;Banshee&gt; flies the grid pattern for a few passes as until the Autobots are closer, then drops the spraying rig in the mud near the river to, hopefuly, minimise the damage to it. Then she banks away and pulls up, lost in the sun. Hidden from view, the Stukacon climbs rapidly, before diving down on the Autobot convoy, its location helpfully pinpointed by the terminus of Blurr's supersonic shockwave.

The Stuka's wing sirens let out a rising wail as the brakes on their turbines are released and they crank up to speed - that's all the warning she gives. As she comes out of the sun she's fifty feet up, nose down and her engine screaming almost as loud as the Jericho Trompettes as she races her bomb towards them for several seconds. Her dive-brakes deploy and she pulls out hard enough to kill a human pilot - her tailwheel snagging a few twigs on the way back up!

Combat: JU-87 &lt;Banshee&gt; sets her defense level to Aggressive.

Combat: JU-87 &lt;Banshee&gt; strikes Armored Car Carrier &lt;Ultra Magnus&gt; with her 50kg GP Bombs Area attack!

Combat: JU-87 &lt;Banshee&gt; strikes Hubcap with her 50kg GP Bombs Area attack!

Combat: JU-87 &lt;Banshee&gt; misses Blurr with her 50kg GP Bombs Area attack!

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Sheiss, zat vos low"

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "I sink I cut ze hedge"

Contrail takes to the air to relay some battlefield telemetry to Banshee! Unfortunately, her battle computer is set to 'sasspants', so the weakness that she reports for Ultra Magnus is, 'Toy is only a repaint in most toylines.' &lt;&lt;...hmm, yeah, just ignore that. Maybe try to flake his armour off a bit?&gt;&gt;

Flipping into a modified F-35B Lightning II, the sky is not the limit.

Combat: F-35B Lightning II &lt;Contrail&gt; sets her defense level to Fearless.

Combat: Contrail analyzes Ultra Magnus for weaknesses Banshee can exploit.

Combat: Drained 4 energon.

Hubcap barely manages to get an arm up to protect his face as shrapnel from Magnus' armour fragments and scatters throughout the trailer. Stumbling, he starts to pick pieces out of his arm. "I think they noticed we're here."

Armored Car Carrier &lt;Ultra Magnus&gt; hears a familiar engine whine before he sees it...But he knows exactly what it means. "Hubcap, hang on!" Magnus exclaims dramatically, doing his best to defensive drive through the Stukacon bombing run! "I think you're right...Everything ok in there?" Weapons systems activating, twin laser turrets hum to life, attempting to get a clear shot on Banshee. &lt;&lt;Blurr, you have the speed advantage on this Propellercon, use it to take her down! I'm pressing forward with Hubcap to get to the bottom of this situation! There's no challenge to big with us working together, Autobots! Roll for it!&gt;&gt;

Combat: Armored Car Carrier &lt;Ultra Magnus&gt; inspires Hubcap and Blurr with patriotic and moving words!

Blurr just barely manages not to slam into Magnus and probably accidentally smash Hubcap to bits. But he barely has time to be relieved as Banshee suddenly dives out of the sky and drops a bomb on he and his comrades. But, being as speedy and agile as he is, he easily jumps away from the explosion and dodges any debris that might have come flying his way. "Heh. Right away, Ultra Magnus, sir." he mutters with an air of sarcasm in his tone, before turning upward to face the Decepticon Stuka. "Hey Decepticreep. That the best you can muster? I mean come -on-, I'm not even scratched!" He taunts, his arms folded, inviting her to try to hit him again.

Rumble has arrived.

An ominous chord strikes on an imaginary soundtrack when the backup plan for destroying vast tracts of land arrives. Among the Insecticon clone pods is a single purple and blue cassette tape -- perfect for launching an ambush in case of Autobots' meddling. It's almost like someone planned it this way -- especially as the cassette transforms into a truly imposing, like, eight-foot-tall robot. "If you don't wanna see these rainforests crumble, then chrome-domed suckers, get through Rumble!"

JU-87 &lt;Banshee&gt; picks up Blurr as a target, of course - she stores the data for later. For now, the speedy one has to be dealt with. She pulls round on a hard loop, still trimming the treetops as she lines up on Blurr for a strafing run. Her guns are zeroed at about 300, so as she pulls up to trace her sights across him. Two rows of little dirt puffs converge as they close on him, and if he looks closely he'll see her pilot hologram, goggles down, leaning forward in the seat. &lt;&lt;I know your kind, Blurr.&gt;&gt; she comments. &lt;&lt;Fast, reckless, agile... FRagile. Hah, ja. You haff to keep on being lucky. Me? I just haff to be lucky once.&gt;&gt;

Combat: JU-87 &lt;Banshee&gt; strikes Blurr with her Strafing Run (Pistol) attack!

F-35B Lightning II &lt;Contrail&gt; encourages the other Decepticons, "The Autobots don't even know what we're doing here! And Ultra Magnus is purple! Our victory is /assured/." Really, who can argue with that logic?

Sky Lynx has arrived.

Combat: Targetting Error: JU-87 &lt;Banshee&gt; is already inspired.

Combat: F-35B Lightning II &lt;Contrail&gt; inspires Rumble with menacing and overbearing words!

A few of the shots graze him in the side as he whips zips back and forth, his body literally a blur of white and blue as he dodges most of her attacks. "Just once? I don't know about that one, especially if you keep on hitting like a lubricator drone at a pit stop." He stops moving for just long enough to transform into his hovercar mode and turn his alt-form weapons upward toward the flying Decepticon.

From orbit, a very large object begins to descend towards the amazonian rain forest. It takes a moment or two, but after a careful de-orbit burn from a chemical based OMS system, a certain space shuttle drops out of the sky. A bright fireball appears over South America as Sky Lynx descends. Now, he could be any space shuttle except, they usually slow down during descent to minimize the scorching effects of the atmosphere. But this one is actually accelerating, the fireball heading right for the conflict zone. He should be there rather soon!

In a flurry of moving parts, Blurr folds down into a pale blue-colored supersonic hovercar.

Armored Car Carrier &lt;Ultra Magnus&gt; pulls up and transforms in front of Contrail and Rumble in a pose sure to inspire fear in his enemies. Except purple. Also, he lets Hubcap out first. Eyeballing the pods, Magnus points at Contrail. "Only a Decepticon would be sick enough to unleash this plot on Earth." His laser blaster phases in and he gestures with it at the two Decepticons. "I'm giving you a final opportunity to collect your technology and return to whatever hole you were built in, Contrail. Failing that, you've left me no choice but to overpower you... with force."

Ultra Magnus transforms into his inspiring POWER-ARMOR ROBOT mode!

Combat: Ultra Magnus takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

Hubcap is unceremoniously ejected from Magnus' trailer. Grumbling, he dusts himself off. "Sure, I deduced the location of a Decepticon attack. Fine, I warned them about the bombs dropping." Then he sighs. "I'm not paid enough for this."

"I was built in a medical ward by Carjack," Contrail points out reasonably in response to Ultra Magnus's slander. Then she adds cheerily, "Also, the time I spend here is time that I am /not/ pulling out McG Lucas's fingernails one by one with some cybertweezers. So think about that, /hero/. You thwart my plan here... and I go home in an awful temper. I start looking at those cybertweezers. Hmm?" She brings up one hand to rub her chin, grinning. "By the way, there's something in your optic."

Probably acid, as she bloops some at Ultra Magnus and then dives behind a priceless mahogany tree.

Combat: F-35B Lightning II &lt;Contrail&gt; sets her defense level to Guarded.

In a transformation that is harder than it looks, Contrail rises up into robot mode.

Combat: Contrail strikes Ultra Magnus with her Acid Strike attack!

Combat: Drained 8 energon.

Rumble's tactical contribution to the battle is to point up at the sky at an incoming meteor. Shades slide over his visor to look up, up, up -- and zoom in on -- "SKY LYNX!" the small robot cries, as if announcing a grenade. "I ain't gonna cyber-chicken out from that overconstructed mecha-turkey--!" Fetching one of the wing-lasers from his back, Rumble opens fire, because until someone actually makes landfall, his traditional methods are fairly useless.

Combat: Rumble misses Magnificient Space Shuttle &lt;Sky Lynx&gt; with his High-Intensity Pulse Laser (Laser) attack!

JU-87 &lt;Banshee&gt; is just passing over Blurr when the lasers strike her hull, burning paintwork and armour but doing no major damage. Seeing as Ultra Magnus is ahead of her, the Propellorcon decides it's time to make use of the targeting data she's got. She doesn't dive-bomb the large Autobot - instead, she makes use of the soft, muddy terrain - it is a rainforest, after all. She drops down to about a hundred feet up and blasts over his head, dropping the bomb early and pulling up. The 250kg Torpedo Ted drops from her chassis and slams down tail first, sliding across the ground and ploughing itself a neat trench - before it hits a tree root and skips into the air - hopefully hitting him in the chest.

If not... well, it still looked good!

Combat: JU-87 &lt;Banshee&gt; strikes Ultra Magnus with her 250kg Penetrator Bombs attack!

The descending fireball reveals itself in no time to be a gleaming, white-hulled space shuttle. At ten thousand feet or so, it expands outwards into Sky Lynx's big 'ol dragon-chicken form; his toothed maw almost seeming to be in a benevolent smile! Of course, Rumble misses. It might be that he didn't lead the fast moving Autobot far enough, maybe he just sucks, or more likely Sky Lynx's aura of ego has simply deflected the shot.

"Autobot comrades, you seem to have found yourself quite a pickle! But fear not, Ultra Magnus, friends, I am here to save you from this situation. Decepticons! You are under orders to retreat immediatly, lest I turn my full powers of justice-filled destruction upon you! Retreat, I say!"

He lands with a thudding sound, and seems to grin. "You have thirty seconds." And then he breaks apart into two component halves, his Dino-Bird taking to the sky while his Cyber-Lynx mode eyes Rumble as though he were a dainty dinner, leaping towards him with jaws outstretched.

Sky Lynx breaks apart into his seperate dinosaur-shuttle-bird thingy and lynx halves!

Combat: Dino-Bird and Robot Lynx &lt;Sky Lynx&gt; sets his defense level to Fearless.

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Der Stukacon Banshee says, "Vot a pompus arsch..."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Contrail says, "I'm glad that our shuttles are much more... down to Earth."

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Triggerhappy pffs and thinks of Astrotrain.

&lt;Decepticon&gt; Triggerhappy says, "Dunno who's worse."

Ultra Magnus was just about to shoot Contrail when the whole acid thing happened. She was just a bit faster. "Blergh!" Magnus responds, followed by a loud "BLAST!" when Banshee opens fire. He staggers forward, gun clattering away. "Lynx, Hupcap, my optics are compromised!" Combat: Ultra Magnus takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

Blurr watches as Banshee decides to change targets. "Ha, finally came to terms with the fact that I outmatch you, huh?" he laughs, speeding after her. His hovercar form accelerates past the speed of sound and manipulates his maneuvers carefully in order to intentionally direct the resulting shockwaves at Banshee's aft. But he groans a little when Sky Lynx makes his dramatic entrance. What a cocky oversized bird. "You know that almost sounded like you thought we were a bunch of rookies who had gone and stupidly gotten themselves into a predicament they couldn't get themselves out of and therefore needed you to come and save their pathetic afts, oh Great Shiny White One." the speedster says wryly, his voice dripping with sarcasm. Now who is more arrogant: Blurr or Sky Lynx? It's hard to say, but Sky Lynx is certainly more pompous.

Combat: Cybertronian Hovercar &lt;Blurr&gt; sets his defense level to Aggressive.

Combat: Cybertronian Hovercar &lt;Blurr&gt; strikes JU-87 &lt;Banshee&gt; with his Sonic Boom attack!

Rumble is, to put it elegantly, chomped. Sky Lynx's bite seizes him by the shoulder, the blue boxy lynx holding Rumble and keeping one arm from doing much of anything at all. "I don't need thirty seconds, jerk," the tiny robot spits, "to give ya thirty of THESE!" His free arm transforms into a piledriver -- and then, he tries to use the close range of the lynx's bite-grasp to pummel in the Autobot's temple.

Combat: Rumble misses Dino-Bird and Robot Lynx &lt;Sky Lynx&gt; with his Piledriver Assault attack!

JU-87 &lt;Banshee&gt; snarls as the shockwave bowls her end-over-end, the Stukacon pulling out of it moments away from hitting a tree. Okay, now she's pissed.

The ju-87 banks around hard and decides to use her own sonic weapon; she transforms and drops to the ground, inhaling sharply and starting to sing. At first, the note is pure, beautiful... but as the cogs on her neck begin to spin, the note becomes more and more disharmonious, more painful to hear as it climbs the pitch range. The sound begins to get directed towards Blur actively as the decepticon's wings spread wide, acting as resonating boards for the wave of painful, razor-sharp sound!

"I scream... YOU DIE!"

Folding and shifting, Banshee transforms into robot mode.

Combat: Banshee strikes Cybertronian Hovercar &lt;Blurr&gt; with her Banshee Scream attack!

Birds are scared from the trees several miles way. A small, primitive tribe creates legends of the scream that birthed the world.

Contrail does not want to get into a fight with Ultra Magnus. However, she has a /plan/ here, and some plans are worth fighting for. She launches herself back into the air to study Ultra Magnus. Weakness: jaw joints are rusty from disuse due to never smiling.

Flipping into a modified F-35B Lightning II, the sky is not the limit.

Combat: F-35B Lightning II &lt;Contrail&gt; sets her defense level to Fearless.

Combat: Contrail analyzes Ultra Magnus for weaknesses.

Combat: Drained 4 energon.

The sound of turbines roars over the battlefield as Sky Lynx's bird mode leans on it's eastern wing and begins setting up for a strafing run. The lynx is entirely too busy attacking Rumble to notice anything around it. Or so it seems. But all is not what it seems and when Sky Lynx speaks, both halves emit the same sound in an almost harmony.

"I say, Ultra Magnus! You should know better than that. Please, getting acid sprayed in your eyes is a /rookie/ thing to do my brother-in-battle! Never look a female in the eye in a potentially comprimising situation, especially a Decepticon! Were I not here to save you, the next thing you would be tasting her scourge as she flayed the armor from your bones. But fortunatly, here I am to save the day, just as always!"

Both halves clear their mutual throats.

"Decepticons, your time is up! Prepare to face the stinging, undiluted and noble wrath of Sky Lynx! Autobots, cease your flippant lollygagging around and aid Ultra Magnus! . . and as to the resty of you lot . . . HAVE AT YOU!"

The Lynx shows remarkable agility in waving it's head around so that it doesn't get hit by Rumble, then attempts to bite him in the face a second later. Meanwhilst the descending dino-bird opens it's mouth and a long stream of flame washes over the battlefield, threatning flying Decepticons and those on the ground alike.

Combat: Dino-Bird and Robot Lynx &lt;Sky Lynx&gt; strikes Banshee with his Team Attack Area attack! [Pulled -3]

Combat: Dino-Bird and Robot Lynx &lt;Sky Lynx&gt; strikes Rumble with his Team Attack Area attack! [Pulled -3]

Combat: Dino-Bird and Robot Lynx &lt;Sky Lynx&gt; strikes F-35B Lightning II &lt;Contrail&gt; with his Team Attack Area attack! [Pulled -3]

Combat: Dino-Bird and Robot Lynx &lt;Sky Lynx&gt; (Sky Lynx) used "Team Attack": A Level 1 AREA-MELEE attack.

Combat: You took 8 damage.

Ultra Magnus drops to one knee, unwilling to fire blindly with Autobots in the area... "Optic reset at 35...I can't deal with that slow progress!" He stays tense, waiting for the worst. "Sky Lynx, we've got to figure out what the Decepticon's plan is!"

Ugh...that noise...that horrible noise! He's not sure which is worse, Sky Lynx's incessant and inane bragging, or Banshee's discordant scream.

Blurr transforms and covers his audio receptors but to no avail, the sonic scream pierces his armor, rattling his internal circuits. Finally, he gives up on blocking out the scream and runs straight at Banshee now that she is grounded, punching her as many times as he can in as many different places as he can...

The hovercar quickly unfolds upward and outward to reveal the fastest terrestrial Cybertronian in the galaxy, Blurr!

Combat: Blurr sets his defense level to Fearless.

Combat: Blurr strikes Banshee with his A Thousand Punches attack!

F-35B Lightning II &lt;Contrail&gt; decides that she has a rare opportunity, now that she knows Ultra Magnus's secret weakness /and/ he is distracted by acid in his optics. She transforms and alights on top of a very, very sturdy tree that once roosted harpy eagles. Contrail observes, "A target-rich environment. That makes this easy." She pulls out one of her shaped charges and throws it down at the Autobots, blasting off and away from the tree.

In a transformation that is harder than it looks, Contrail rises up into robot mode.

Combat: Contrail sets her defense level to Fearless.

Streetwise has arrived.

Combat: Contrail strikes Blurr with her Captain Planet Hates Me (Full-Auto) Area attack!

Combat: Contrail strikes Ultra Magnus with her Captain Planet Hates Me (Full-Auto) Area attack!

Combat: Removing analysis data for Ultra Magnus.

Combat: Contrail strikes Dino-Bird and Robot Lynx &lt;Sky Lynx&gt; with her Captain Planet Hates Me (Full-Auto) Area attack!

Combat: Drained 9 energon.

Rumble is not only bitten, he's stuck trying to make heads or tails of Sky Lynx's ramblings -- admittedly, oratory is not one of the Decepticon's finer points. See also: his reaction, when he snaps, "Aw, shut up!" A microsecond later, Sky Lynx bites Rumble's face. "AW! MY FACE!" the tiny thug cries, falling back, running out of the blast radius Contrail had previously announced. "Nice!" he cries out to the jet, before transforming his /other/, wounded arm. "But just in case they ain't smart enough to know to stay down--!"

Rumble begins initiating a minor earthquake as his piston-arms drum the ground. It does not occur to him that seeding an earthquake may also damage the Insecticon clone pods.

Combat: Rumble sets his defense level to Fearless.

Combat: Rumble strikes Dino-Bird and Robot Lynx &lt;Sky Lynx&gt; with his Earthquake! Area attack!

Combat: That attack has temporarily limited Dino-Bird and Robot Lynx &lt;Sky Lynx&gt;'s Agility! (Crippled)

Combat: Rumble strikes Blurr with his Earthquake! Area attack!

Combat: That attack has temporarily limited Blurr's Agility! (Crippled)

Combat: Rumble strikes Ultra Magnus with his Earthquake! Area attack!

Combat: That attack has temporarily limited Ultra Magnus's Agility! (Crippled)

Combat: Rumble strikes Insecticon Clone Pods with his Earthquake! Area attack!

Combat: That attack has temporarily limited Insecticon Clone Pods's Agility! (Crippled)

Banshee rolls away from the punches and powers away on her antigravs, transforming to climb away at speed, smoke trailing in thick black clouds from her exhausts. Her engine note sounds unhealthy as she ascends, a few larger 'ball' clouds appearing in the smoke as her engine backfires. She's trying to get some distance an assess her options...

Combat: Banshee sets her defense level to Protected.

Combat: Banshee takes extra time to steady herself. [Pass]

Sky Lynx is caught in Contrail's explosion! In fact, he's not just caught on the edge he is right at ground zero. He fails to dodge it so bad that he actually fails to dodge Rumble's attack and the earthquake causes the lynx to stumble and fall, thrashing around on the ground for a moment or two before the bird catches up with it. Quickly, the two mate and rise up into Sky Lynx's combined dragon form.

He has absolutely no retort to being caught with his pants down like that and lowers his head; mouth opening. The blaster there heats up white hot as he simply attempts to roast Rumble to pieces for the indignity.

Sky Lynx at first appears to be transforming into his space shuttle mode, but the nosecone splits open to reveal a toothy maw. The 'external tank' of the Space Shuttle extends long legs as a tail appears behind. Sky Lynx is now a space dragon thing!

Combat: Sky Lynx sets his defense level to Fearless.

Combat: Sky Lynx strikes Rumble with his FLAMBE attack! [Pulled -3]