2033 Olympics: Decepticon Free-For-All

The forbidding plains of Iceland are as rugged and epic-looking as one could hope for for a showdown of a brutal warrior race! They spread from the sea in fields of patchy greenery to volcanic mountains that rise in sheer crags, steaming with heat and patched with snow and ice.

Viewing platforms have been affixed onto the mountainside overlooking the plain for the humans, aliens, and Cybertronians attending, covered in forcefield bubbles to protect them from stray ordinance. Many of the fans are waving Decepticon logo flags or wearing Decepticon logo tshirts, or festooned with other SwindleCo(tm) merchandise (available in the gift store). Galvatron stands on a floating platform over the harsh plain. He may not be allowed to take part, but no one has seen fit to try to stop him from presiding over this event. "My DECEPTICONS!" he yells, amplified enough without any external sound system. "You have DONE WELL! Once again, this year, we have showed the organic life forms and the Autobots alike who the SUPERIOR beings are! Now, let us see who is first among equals! You know the rules; you know your arms and your opponents! Let the winner be wreathed in glory! Introduce yourselves for the cameras, so the galaxy might know their conquering heroes!"

F-16XL Jet Fighter  soars into the area, transforming and touching down next to Galvatron on one of the floating platforms. From his holsters, two stylized guns jump out and transform, making picture perfect landings in Nebulon mode. "Oh man," Needlenose says, "I sure can't wait to watch all these fools fight each other for our amusement." "Heh heh, yeah," Zigzag snickers, "The only thing that could mess this up would be if we were ordered to take part or something."

The robo vulture is here, safely hidden away from the others, at least for now. In truth, it's a bad place for him here, however he does get a rare opprotunity. To show these Cons what he really thinks of them. Certainly Galvatron would approve, though Laserbeak ponders...it would be good to see Soundwave get out of the lab and start killing every living Con here. Good times. He considers the options as his long range optics zoom in on the main frecas, about 80 meters away. Americon...Laserbeak wasn't too sure on him, but some of the others were packing firepower. Perhaps his best move would be to aid others first. Someone that wouldn't tip his hand that he had an 'unfair' advantage.

Finally, an event where Triggerhappy is -actually- allowed to shoot. He had been hoping that Misfire would show up, but would've come regardless. The mech had probably fallen into stasis again while scrubbing the barracks or something. Either that or he'd overenergized himself into a stupor on that secret stash of Dirge's Special Brew of his again.

Anyway, a chance to shoot up someone or someTHING was just what he needed, even if they weren't Autobots. Still, he took consolation in the fact this boring truce was going to be over very soon. Then he could get back to the -real- fights. He flies out from behind an icy volcano and descends into the arena, transforming and landing smoothly on two foot servos.

Triggerhappy reverts to his root form.

Thrust appears, hovering on his turbofans mounted in his wings, transforms and gives the cameras a big thumbs-up. "I'm Thrust, and I'm going to beat all these guys!" he says, "I'll show everybody I'm the best Decepticon ever! He flashes a huge grin, the sun glinting uncomfortably to spectators off his polished light face. His yellow optics glint with bravado.

Thrust folds out back into robot mode, his cockpit folding against his chest, his wings reverse, and his arms pop out.

Soaring in, Fusillade wing-rocks to those observing, before transforming and settling down, slightly behind Needlenose. Her Cheshire smile starts burning the back of his head. "Heyyyyyy, howzit goin'?" She juts one h and up in the sky and waves cheerily.

The sleek bomber rears up, wings collapsing onto hips even as the rear fuselage splits to form arms. The horizontal stabilizer slides up, the forward fuselage folds up accordian style, and Fusillade hops up on thrustered feet.

A horrifying snowman lands from above! "I AM!!!" He does some sort of weird Ginyu pose, like something halfway between a leg stretch and an almost fascist salute. "AMERICON! And I am here in my SNOW camoflauge!" He waves his snow-laden arms around some more. "UHHH! HOOWAH! URRAAHH--hey, what the hell?" He looks around the green plains. "I was told this was ICELAND! In America!"

Combat: Your stats and limits have been reset by an administrator.

Needlenose turns around to face Fusillade, "Sup, Aero-dudette? I'm here to watch and see how many people blow each other up. I got fifty Shanix on Americon trying to blow up the country for being anti-American." Sunbeam meanwhile gives Fusillade an appreciative glance up and down.

Americon undergoes a patriotic transformation into his All-American robot mode!

Just after Galvatron's proclimation the thrum of an engine can be heard. The source revealed to be a tan military jeep (cira sometime in the mid 1980s) that comes cruises around the side of one of the rock formations. That skids into a spin, then flips up and over into a transformation. Landing with a thump Swindle stands up and with his usual greased salesmech charm as he waves at a camera and smiles. "And remember folks," holds up his right arm at his side as the scatterblaster's firing chamber rotates and locks into place with a audible loading *chnk*, "Many of the fine munitions you'll see here in use tonight are available at spectacular black market prices! You want a deal to light up your enemies? Then just drop on down and see SWINDLE." His other hand he holds up to the side of his head with thumb and pinky up to make a 'telephone'. "Just dial 1-800-SWINDLE-U, operators are standing by!"

Brief scene-pan back to the hidden Combaticon base, where Blast Off and Vortex are glaring at the viewscreen while Swindle does his little shpeal. Then at the phone banks in front of them. "How the slag did we get roped into this?" "Because we owe him. As usual." "Right."

Galvatron laughs at Americon's confusion. "The primitive war-humans who discovered this place, Americon, named it Ice-Land to hide it from their enemies! There is a larger landmass to the east, almost wholly encased in ice, which they named Green-Land. A simple but murderous deception! I found it appropriate. Heh. Now, Decepticons... FIGHT!"

Americon stares at Galvatron, open-mouthed. "This country lied to me! And so did the other one! DAMN YOU ICELAND!" He flings himself into the air, transforming into eagle mode, firing upon the ground. "Nobody lies to Americon without being at least somewhat injured as a consequence of it!" His lasers stitch across the ground, threatening to hit Thrust!

Laserbeak zooms in on the group. Targetting data starts loading for each of the combatants. He zooms in on Swindle. The bird's eyes narrow, he might be a good candidate to boost...for now, not to mention all the illicit deals that Decepticon Intel would love to catch him on...all those juicy secrets. He shakes his head, time enough for leverage later, now he needed to focus. Who to attack however? Triggerhappy and Contrail seemed like good choices....Needlenose too. Eh, he lets the randomizer do the work for him, they'll all burn the same.

Americon's robot legs pop out metallic feather-like objects as they and his lower torso split apart, also revealing an eagle head. The arms and robot head join the main body, and his guns convert into tail feathers and rocket launchers. Americon is now a bald eagle!

Combat: Laserbeak analyzes Needlenose for weaknesses Swindle can exploit.

Combat: Robotic Bald Eagle  strikes Thrust with his LIEland (Laser) attack!

Robotic Bald Eagle  is now a snow eagle, of course.

Triggerhappy is a bit overeager to start shooting, yeah. He charges in with guns blazing, laughing maniacally while Blowpipe mutters about what a horrible waste of energon this was. But, the Nebulan is well aware of the fact that his binary bond partner doesn't give a slag about how this match is going to end up, which is usually the case in any sort of fight, anyway...

He just groans to himself and waits for this to be all over...

Combat: Triggerhappy sets his defense level to Aggressive.

"HEY, watch it, flag-brain!" Thrust snaps at Americon, "It's not MY fault that the humans misname things!" He fires a return shot at the red-white-and-bluebird. "While we're on the subject of accuracy, maybe you should transform into a TURKEY!"

Combat: Thrust sets his defense level to Aggressive.

Combat: Thrust strikes Robotic Bald Eagle  with his Say hello to my little TURKEY BASTER! (Pistol) attack!

"That seems like a pretty safe bet, I don't think you'll get better than seven on five for that one," Fusillade remarks to the Double Targetmaster. "Welp, time to get to it!" She begins to sidle away, but quickly picks up that she's not being followed. "Don't be like that, git in there!" she shouts, drawing one wingblade and whalloping him with the flat of the folded-up weapon.

Combat: Targetting Error: No target named 'thrust americon swindle needlenose'

Combat: Fusillade misses Needlenose with her Wingblades attack!

Combat: Triggerhappy strikes Thrust with his WOOT FINALLY! (Full-Auto) Area attack!

Combat: Triggerhappy strikes Robotic Bald Eagle  with his WOOT FINALLY! (Full-Auto) Area attack!

Combat: Triggerhappy strikes Swindle with his WOOT FINALLY! (Full-Auto) Area attack!

Combat: Triggerhappy strikes Needlenose with his WOOT FINALLY! (Full-Auto) Area attack!

Needlenose goes back to standing next to Galvatron with his arms crossed and totally not participating in the fight. He isn't even aware that Laserbeak is totally checking him out. Yeah... yeah, Beaker, you look. Get a good, long, hard look. See what drives the femmes in the Decepticon Empire. Speaking of which, Needlenose glances to his right, "Get to it? Get to wh- IEEEE!"

Needlenose gets shoved forward, falling off the platform and getting riddled with bullets as he falls and potentially lands on top of Triggerhappy, crushing his fellow Targetmaster.

Sunbeam hesitates, heading over to the edge and peering down. "Should we go get him?" he asks. Zigzag shrugs. "Meh."

Combat: Needlenose misses Triggerhappy with his WHUMP (Kick) attack!

Fusillade says, "Well now you have your answer to what drives warplanes/ of the Empire."

Komatsu D575A Superdozer  bursts dramatically through a massive random brick wall that may have been placed specifically for that to happen. With a terrifying TOOT TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT, Bonecrusher announces his intention to kill everyone! "Bonecrusher is HERE and it's high tiiiiiiimmmmah to DO SOME PUNCHING AND SMASHING!" The Dozer lurches forward into the field of battle, searching for his first target! His perfectly normal bulldozer laser cannon charges up, looking for a target...

Combat: Komatsu D575A Superdozer  sets his defense level to Guarded.

Swindle is just about to go into another pitch when he gets... Well now, what's this? Not the sort of calls he was expecting, but certainly one worth it to take note of for later. Unfortunately Triggerhappy decides to live up to his name, and spew ammo everywhere. The Combaticon lifts up his left arm to shield his face, bullets potmarking the armor plating that may or may not be his jeep door. "Okay then, less talking and more doing." Crouching he pops his smaller pistol into his hand, points it at the gunslinger, and fires. "Like this amazing little baby, sieze up enemy joints just like that!"

Combat: Swindle sets his defense level to Guarded.

Combat: Swindle strikes Triggerhappy with his Gyro Gun attack! [Pulled -1]

Combat: That attack has temporarily impaired Triggerhappy's Agility. (Crippled)

Robotic Bald Eagle  is skewered by lasers and, wait, what does Triggerhappy shoot again? Compressed air? What? Well, it does blast off the snow that had been coating Americon, revealing his true form. "MY CAMOFLAUGE! Ah, well, Iceland lied to me anyway... sniff..." He swoops around the battlefield, looking for easy prey! Say, is that Needlenose's Nebulan partners? Ah-ha! Americon lands and transforms and lands next to Zigzag, grinning. "HAHA! I am bigger and stronger than you, so I can push you around and be a jerk!" He pushes Zigzag, and maybe this will cause empathic damage or something. "HAHA! I am mean! IN AMERICA."

Americon undergoes a patriotic transformation into his All-American robot mode!

Combat: Americon misses Needlenose with his Shove (Punch) attack!

Needlenose lands... right next to Triggerhappy. It is a graceful, elegant faceplant square into the side of the mountain. He's quick to get back up, though, as he rises to a kneeling position with both hands outstretched. "Sunbeam, Zigzag, to me!" *crickets* "I said, Sunbeam, Zigzag, get your asses down here unless you wanna be castrated!" Within a split second, both Targetmasters leap down (Zigzag doing so just before Americon can shove him) from the platform Galvatron is riding and land perfectly in Needlenose's hands. "Hey Fusillade," he shouts, aiming with both pistols, "Payback's a bitch and--" Whoop, superior officer alert, superior officer alert, "...you're really awesome... I guess."

Combat: Needlenose sets his defense level to Aggressive.

Combat: Needlenose strikes Fusillade with his Light Burst Discharger attack!

Combat: Needlenose uses up a charge on his Double Targetmaster booster pack!

Phew, that sure felt good! This was definitely looking like -much- more fun than that stupid demo derby. Needlenose is peppered with his bullets and falls off of his platform, nearly landing on top of Triggerhappy, but he manages to jump out of the way. "Hey, look where you're falling next time!" he taunts, only to be struck in shoulder plates by Swindle's gyro gun. He can feel his servos seizing up, though the weapon didn't do that much damage. He smirks, turning to Swindle. "HAHAHAH!" he cackles. "You might be good at that talking thing, but shooting? Not so much!" The mech swings Blowpipe around to face the Combaticon.

Komatsu D575A Superdozer  dozes around turning the landscape into dust while everyone flies and leaps every where. Finally, he spots THRUST. "Looks like this CONEHEAD is about to be A DEADHEAD, DIG IT!" Purple death laser crackles from his bulldozer lasers towards the Seeker!

Combat: Komatsu D575A Superdozer  misses Thrust with his Standard-Issue Constructicon Laser Pistol (Laser) attack!

Fusillade gives a hearty laugh at the falling, and the screaming, and the shooting. "He'll find his way back," she says dismissively, before flinching as Americon comes zooming at her as a byproduct of attacking the Nebulons! "Gack!" She shouts, even as Needlenose pops back up and scoops up said partners. And squeezes them. To make pain.

A loud HONK comes from the speakers as a forbidden technology detector goes off! "That Decepticon is teamed up with two other smaller Decepticons!" calls one of the referees, throwing up a red flag. "Those are his Nebulans!" Galvatron yells back, but even though they argue over it, it seems that the flag will stick.

Combat: Triggerhappy strikes Swindle with his Less talking more SHOOTING! attack! [Pulled -1]

Laserbeak curses to himself, that stupid Triggerhappy disrupted his feed. Well, now someone went and made himself a target. Triggerhappy would never know what loomed over him like a vast, predatory bird. As a skulker, Laserbeak could do no less than change his targetting. Thin the herd as it were, then he'd be in the fray...

Combat: Laserbeak analyzes Triggerhappy for weaknesses Swindle can exploit.

Combat: Thrust strikes Komatsu D575A Superdozer  with his Hey I heard you like purple so have some more PURPLE to go with your PURPLE! (Laser) attack!

Swindle bolts upright at the horn. "I DIDN'T DO IT I SWEA--" Stops, blinks optics as the flag is thrown on the Targetmaster instead. ".. Oh. Sorry, force of habit." Pause, then holds a hand up to shout. "Hey Needlenose, I owe you a drink later for winning me the bets on someone cheating in this match!"

Then gets pelted with an air gun blast, knocking him on his bum. So much for the defensive. "Right back at you, slugslinger! Or.. wait.. oh, nevermind, doesn't matter which one you are." As he gets a complete feed this time he pulls a generic blaster and fires at Trigger

Combat: Swindle strikes Triggerhappy with his Generic Combaticon Arms (Laser) attack!

Komatsu D575A Superdozer  growls as he's peppered with wimpy laser fire. "How aboutcha come down here and try that, PUNK! CUZ I'LL SNAP INTO YOU!" The bulldozer circles around, tooting his horn threateningly, but doesn't return fire.

Combat: Komatsu D575A Superdozer  takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

Americon gawks at the speakers as they disqualify Needlenose! "Hey! I was bullying his Nebulans! Nobody disqualifies a Decepticon but me... I... I guess. DIE!" He transforms into eagle mode, firing a veritable death blossom of rockets at the speakers, but some of the rockets veer off course and may accidentally fly into Bonecrusher! Oh no! "Hey, wait, Bonecrusher, did you really build a wall in the middle of AMERICA just so you could smash it? Come on, that's something a Contractorcon would do!"

Americon's robot legs pop out metallic feather-like objects as they and his lower torso split apart, also revealing an eagle head. The arms and robot head join the main body, and his guns convert into tail feathers and rocket launchers. Americon is now a bald eagle!

Combat: Robotic Bald Eagle  misses Komatsu D575A Superdozer  with his Rockets' Red Glare attack!

Triggerhappy is knocked into a wall by Swindle's shot. "What the slag? How did that weapon hit me so hard?!" He mutters to himself, unaware that Laserbeak had quietly assisted Swindle. Oh well. He shrugs, getting back up and jumping into the air as he shifts into his flight form. "My -name- is Triggerhappy, genius. Primus, I thought you'd be better than -that- at names, what with all those contacts of yours!"

Triggerhappy transforms into a blue and white Cybertronian aircraft.

"Disqualified? What?" Needlenose sputters. "Dude, that's /racism against Targetmasters/." He holsters Sunbeam and Zigzag. As he flies upwards, he grins at Swindle, "I'm holding you to that. See you dudes after the match." Needlenose touches down next to Galvatron so he can pretend he's a big boss man also.

Combat: Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter  sets his defense level to Fearless.

Combat: Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> strikes Swindle with his EAT PHOTONS! attack!

Galvatron glares at the Nebulans like this is their fault. "Keep your minions better concealed next time, Needlenose."

Laserbeak smirks to himself, he couldn't stay out the entire match...but another few rounds couldn't hurt. Actually they COULD hurt, these Cons could gang up on him and... Laserbeak shivered instinctively. Galvatron wouldn't let them...well he actually would, but either way, the point was not to get caught in a crossfire. Swindle took some shots, even if he fell soon, Laserbeak could always back another Con. One more round, then perhaps a quick respite...yes, that would do.

Combat: Laserbeak analyzes Triggerhappy for weaknesses Swindle can exploit.

Thrust just laughs at Bonecrusher. "Maybe later, when I've taken care of the rest of these losers," he says, spotting an opportune target in Americon. The cassette is smaller and weaker than him so of course he's a perfect target! He rapid-fires his arm-mounted lasers at Americon, while taunting, "How about I clip your wings?"

Combat: Thrust strikes Robotic Bald Eagle <Americon> with his Ima shoot me a feather bed! (Laser) attack!

Robotic Bald Eagle <Americon> squawks as he takes a shot in the wing, plowing into the ground! "OW! Yeah!? Well..." He pushes himself up, spitting out a wad of dirt. "How about I clip your FACE, Thrust!?" And he sprays a furious salvo of red, white, and blue lasers at Thrust's face!

Komatsu D575A Superdozer <Bonecrusher> just grunts as Thrust pusses out, and spots Swindle. "Welllll FINE then! Time for some gang warfare, gettin' brutal on this Constructicon, DEVASTATION style! HEEEERE WEEEEE GOOOO!" He picks it up to full speed, which isn't all that fast, and fires off a massive concussion bomb! Damage time!

Americon undergoes a patriotic transformation into his All-American robot mode!

Combat: Komatsu D575A Superdozer <Bonecrusher> misses Swindle with his Concussion Bomb Launcher attack!

Combat: Americon misses Thrust with his Red White and Blue Lasers attack!

"Sarcasm is just one of the services I offer!" Swindle retorts back. He attempts to duck and roll out of the way, but the photons detonating on the ground catch him in the blast and toss the Combaticon across the battlefield. "Oof!" Grunts as he picks himself up, only to have Bonecrusher throw a bomb at him... Which Swindle manages to have better luck darting out of the way of. "Okay, I guess if you both want to play rough!"

Skidding to a stop he spins around, brings up his main weapon arm as the barrel irises out for better spread. "Why waste time with a piddly old fashion shot gun, when you can pepper your enemies with -explosive- pellets of pain courtesy of a fine tuned scatterblaster? Lets have a demonstration for the nice folks at home." The cannon retorts twice as he fires off two bursts of ammunition in rapid succession.

"Yes, clip his face!" Galvatron shouts down in encouragement from the floating platform. "Let no face survive your wrath!"

Combat: Swindle strikes Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> with his Scatter Blaster Area attack!

Combat: Swindle strikes Komatsu D575A Superdozer <Bonecrusher> with his Scatter Blaster Area attack!

Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> laughs as he scores another hit on Swindle, barrelrolling in the air as if to taunt him further. Now this was -real- fun. But he was getting tired of the same target, now. In fact, he felt like hitting something bigger this time. Like Bonecrusher. So he turns his guns on the Constructicon, firing at the superdozer from the air.

Laserbeak temporarily clicks off his sensors. No need to raise too much alarm here. He'd be in the fray soon enough, especially now that the others were weakened a bit. However, the bird reminded himself, he had used up some precious energon as well in his underhanded tactics. He ducks his head back down beneath the rock he uses for cover and waits.

Combat: Laserbeak takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

Combat: Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> strikes Komatsu D575A Superdozer <Bonecrusher> with his The bigger they are the harder they fall! attack!

Meanwhile, back at home, a number scrolls across the bottom of the screen for viewers to call RIGHT NOW to order their own Commemorative Collectible 2033 Olympic Edition Scatterblaster for 1440 easy payments of 29.95.

"You couldn't clip your own face if it was attached to your head," Thrust says to Americon, "So how about I come over there and take that beak off for you and turn it into a necklace?"

Combat: Thrust misses Americon with his Got your...nose? (Punch) attack!

Komatsu D575A Superdozer <Bonecrusher> keeps charging at Swindle, despite the impact of his weaponry. He's focused on breaking him: Triggerhappy's attack doesn't even register. "IZZAT ALL YOU GOT?! Well I'm thinki' what I'm think' and what I'm thinkin is TIME TA GET CRUSHED YEEEAH!" His dozer blade drops into position, ready to crush Swindle into a pulp!

Combat: Komatsu D575A Superdozer <Bonecrusher> sets his defense level to Fearless.

Combat: Komatsu D575A Superdozer <Bonecrusher> misses Swindle with his Killdozer attack!

Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> is knocked off course by Swindle's scatterblaster, again wondering how in the name Primus that weapon had done -that- much damage. But again, he doesn't bother with giving it much thought. The jet spins out of control, falling toward the ground were Americon is. Whooping all the way. Don't ask why. Maybe he enjoys falling.

Combat: Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> misses Americon with his Look out BELOWWWWW! (Smash) attack!

Needlenose says, "Hey mighty Lord Galvatron?"

Americon transfoms and flings himself right into Thrust's face! "HOW ABOUT I PECK YOUR OPTICS OUT! Caw! Caw! CAW!" He tries to clamp onto Thrust's face with his talons and viciously peck and rip at Thrust's optic sensors, cawing hideously! Meanwhile, the Alkaris watch the event from their homeworld, and cheer Americon's sound tactics!

Triggerhappy flomps into the ground behind him, the cassetticon oblivious in his FYOOREH.

"Hm?" asks Galvatron distractedly, who was watching Swindle and Bonecrusher.

Needlenose says, "If you could only have the Combaticons or the Constructicons on your side, which would it be?"

Americon's robot legs pop out metallic feather-like objects as they and his lower torso split apart, also revealing an eagle head. The arms and robot head join the main body, and his guns convert into tail feathers and rocket launchers. Americon is now a bald eagle!

Combat: Robotic Bald Eagle <Americon> misses Thrust with his O' Say Can You See attack!

Galvatron frowns. "In a battle? Or do you mean... in general?"

No surprise there's a fair amount of animosity between combiner team members. As the KILLDOZER comes churning towards him Swindle just smirks a bit as he pops a small device out of a hidden compartment of his arm, points it at one of the rock formations around the icelandic arena and fires a tether-beam that grabs the rock and yanks him off the ground -right- before getting flattened.

Landing on the outcropping Swindle hunkers down again, even as he points his scatterblaster after the dozer, aims a more focused blast, and fires.

Needlenose says, "In general. Like if one of them just up and vanished or if Omega Supreme ate one of them and you only had the other left."

Laserbeak takes flight finally. The bird is stealthy as he approaches the dust and energy charged battle. He sticks low to the ground, his route already confirmed ahead of time. It was dangerous, but Laserbeak didn't feel like being disqualified. His receptors pick up a most....distasteful sound 'peck out your optics' Peck out...Peck out your optics? That was HIS job, not Americon. His beak clenches in quiet fury, sure Americon was very much like him, but it was decided just now that it was time to prove that he is NOT as good as the original. His cannons open fire from behind.

Combat: Laserbeak appears from the shadows...

Combat: Swindle strikes Komatsu D575A Superdozer <Bonecrusher> with his Scatter Blaster attack!

Combat: Sneak Attack!!

Combat: Laserbeak strikes Robotic Bald Eagle <Americon> with his Independently Targetable Laser

"The Constructicons," Galvatron says without hesitation. "I brought them to Earth first for a REASON. The importance of Cybertron's greatest engineers to the war effort cannot be overstated. Why do you ask?"

"Ugh, get out of my face you feathered shrimp!" Thrust acks, fleeing the talons of Americon. He backs up and transforms, soaring higher in Jet mode as he searches for another target.

Combat: Thrust takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

"Just seems like the sort of thing that would be useful to know the next time I wanna verbally bitchslap the Combaticons," Needlenose explains.

"Slag it slag it slag!" Bonecrusher transforms, and kicks a boulder into smithereens. He leaps into the air, powered by thrusters, for a massive LEAPING PUNCH at Swindle!

Bonecrusher stops destroying everything long enough to be a robot.

Combat: Bonecrusher strikes Swindle with his Punch attack!

Needlenose said that perfectly timed with Bonecrusher leaping at Swindle.

Galvatron's lip twists in a hateful smile. "You are cruel, Needlenose. I like that in you. The Combaticons have proven their worth to me, but I have not forgotten that their first commission was to attempt a coup on behalf of that vile worm, Starscream. I only forgave them and permitted them back from deep space exile because they impressed me by conquering Darkmount from Shockwave. The Combaticons are cunning, powerful, and capable, yes... but they have always been mercenaries. They lack the abiding dedication of the Constructicons."

Robotic Bald Eagle <Americon> is reamed by Laserbeak's powerful lasers, which blast a gaping hole through his chest! However, Americon has numerous redundant systems in his crazy, overdesigned body, and thus, even though he is blasted off of Thrust, collasping onto the primitive ground in a heap, he soon springs back up in robot mode! "LASERBEAK! You son of a gli--wait, we have the same dad. Uh. You b--no, same issue." He pauses, frowning. "SCREW YOU!" he at last says, and whips out an ENORMOUS bazooka-like gun, which he aims at Laserbeak. "FACE THE AMERICANNON!!!" He fires--but did his aim drift a little bit? He can't quite see through the scope--it's just a bit too high!

Americon undergoes a patriotic transformation into his All-American robot mode!

Combat: Americon sets his defense level to Fearless.

Combat: Americon strikes Laserbeak with his Americannon attack!

Upon his perch Swindle takes a moment to mentally lament that he can't use any of his -fun- toys right now. But seeing the referees actually call foul on Needlenose is enough to detain the scammer from pulling out the contraband. And then he has a big mean green smashing machine jumping up and punching him, the blow sending him tumbling back off the rocks. Which he rolls over and promptly dives behind.

Then peeks out the other side just far enough to aim his gyro gun at the INFERIOR of the two birds and pay Laserbeak back for some of the help he got earlier.

And now would be a good time to beat it, now that he made himself known. Laserbeak roars to the air, intent on outpacing any possible retribution. Still it was better to have a trick up his sleeve, and Laserbeak was all about ensuring leverage. As he takes any possible fight up above the others, he engages his lock on targeting on Americon, as a pure detterent of course. Down below, the weird cassette is babbling about something. It was then that his aft engines caught fire, leaving the vulture very VERY concerned, smoke trailing from him. Concern and impudence coarse through his circuits.

Combat: Laserbeak sets his defense level to Protected.

Combat: Laserbeak misses Americon with his Targeting Laser attack!

"Ugh..." Triggerhappy groans as he smacks into the ground, hard. Now that -really- hurt. Swindle is really getting the upper hand, here, it seems. Blowpipe takes the liberty to speak up. "You're running low on energon, Triggerhappy..." The Nebulan warns. "Shut UP! I -know-!" He snaps, because he hates realizing that he needs to lay off the attacks for the moment, but he doesn't really have a choice. Blowpipe's right, his energon is dangerously low, and Swindle now appears to be distracted with Bonecrusher, so the gunner transforms and retreats a short distance away, ducking behind a rock.

Triggerhappy reverts to his root form.

Combat: Triggerhappy takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

Combat: Swindle strikes Americon with his Gyro Gun attack!

Combat: That attack has temporarily impaired Americon's Agility. (Crippled)

A huge red, white, and blue blast streaks out towards Laserbeak, with blue and white specks of light--stars?--shooting out from the barrel of the Americannon!

VTOL-modified F-15 <Thrust> finally decides, now that nobody's paying attention to him, to attack Bonecrusher, when he least expects it. He does a circus-stunt flyby on the Constructicon, his turbofans roaring loudly as he swoops in low.

Combat: VTOL-modified F-15 <Thrust> strikes Bonecrusher with his Turbofan SONIC BOOM! attack!

Needlenose turns his head towards Galvatron, genuinely interested in what the big cheese has to say. Not everyone gives Galvatron credit for his intellect, but Needlenose can see it. The Targetmaster scratches his chin, "Always seemed like it'd be a darn near impossible job being leader. Always gotta worry about the dopes out there that'd turn traitor at the drop of a hat."

"YOU!" Bonecrusher POINTS at Thrust when the Seeker booms at him. Doesn't seem to sell the pain much, though. "I haven't beat you up yet! WAIT RIGHT THERE." He zooms through the air to the judge's dais. A larger organize femme judge of Barkida's species shakes her fist at him.

"Off our our dais, you troll!" She explains.

"Outta my FACE you mean!" Bonecrusher responds, super clever like, and kicks her in the head really hard of the dais. He then picks up her chair, folds it, POINTS at Thrust again, feels the roar of the ground, and then makes a thruster powered LEAP towards the Conehead, aiming to break a chair over his metal skull! "MISSSS ELIZAMECHHHHHHH!"

Combat: Bonecrusher strikes VTOL-modified F-15 <Thrust> with his FROM THE TOP ROPE! attack!

"Ah, that's better!" Triggerhappy grins as he regains some of his energon. And so it's right back into the fray! He transforms back into a jet and flies after the only mech who isn't getting attacked by anyone--Thrust. Time to see who was a better flier. He locks his photon pulse guns onto Thrust's afterburners.

Triggerhappy transforms into a blue and white Cybertronian aircraft.

Combat: Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> misses VTOL-modified F-15 <Thrust> with his You don't get off that easy! attack!

As the Femaxian tumbles to the ground (where she lands with a painful-sounding crack) from the chair Bonecrusher grabs to bludgeon Thrust with, the other referees jump up in outrage! HOOOONK goes the airhorn again as every surviving referee throws up a red card on Bonecrusher for a foreign object disqualification!

Laserbeak continues his ariel pacing, trying to ensure he didn't stay at a single elevation or pattern for long. That red, white and blue bot struck him good. Not enough to panic...yet, but the multicolored smoke from his rear didn't bode well. Laserbeak sweats oil in thought, what if this was more than attack, an all out betrayal from the Cons. His targeting array didn't even catch Americon properly. He started to see his life flash before his optics. He was built...built long ago, and then something about returning to Megatron...

Combat: Laserbeak takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

Seems like everyone is focusing on everyone else now. Which means its the perfect time to strike. Which means it's time for Swindle to dart out from his hiding spot and... run away? Not really, he just needs to get enough distance from the main fighting to get everyone in proper view. Assumes a firing stance and holds out his scatterblaster in a pose very akin to Galvatron's means of holding out his cannon. Sucking up? Maybe. Either way the weapon's firing chamber starts to spin up, and several *THOOMS* ring from the weapon as Swindle sweeps it across the battlefield. Laserbeak is the only spared a shot at, what could that possibly mean?!

Combat: Swindle strikes Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> with his Scatterblaster Full Auto Area attack!

Combat: Swindle's attack has damaged your Agility!

Combat: Swindle strikes Americon with his Scatterblaster Full Auto Area attack!

Americon was sent flying from the recoil, but it's okay, but Americon is built for pain! Lots and lots of pain! But Swindle's scatterblaster doesn't help, ripping his body up, especially delicate motors in his arms needed for precision! "That's it!" Americon transforms into eagle mode, zipping back at Swindle. "SWINDLE! You conniving bastard! But you're a capitalist and I respect that!" He fires lots of rockets at him!

Americon's robot legs pop out metallic feather-like objects as they and his lower torso split apart, also revealing an eagle head. The arms and robot head join the main body, and his guns convert into tail feathers and rocket launchers. Americon is now a bald eagle!

Combat: Robotic Bald Eagle <Americon> strikes Swindle with his Rockets' Red Glare attack!

VTOL-modified F-15 <Thrust>'s nosecone goes through a chair seat and he skids to the ground, transforming and pulling the chair off. "Dirty rotten cheater!" he snaps as Bonecrusher gets dragged off. He rubs his pointy cone head, looks around and spots Triggerhappy trying to get a bead on him. But the targetmaster misses! "You couldn't hit the broad side of Metroplex!" he says, firing a missile at Triggerhappy.

Thrust folds out back into robot mode, his cockpit folding against his chest, his wings reverse, and his arms pop out.

Combat: Thrust strikes Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> with his Air-to-Air Missile attack!

Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> is sent spinning off course thanks to Swindle's scatterblaster once again, and before he can recover he finds himself faced with a missile from Thrust. His afterburners spark and smoke, but he laughs anyway, seemingly undeterred. He knew he was going to be KO'ed soon, but he'd enjoyed it while it lasted.

He speeds toward thrust, kicking it as fast as he can.

Combat: Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> misses Thrust with his Ram attack!

Laserbeak decides after a moment, he could get someone else to drop that missile launcher for him. He banks to the right, his head tilted downward. Americon's been making a LOT of trouble, and a lot of enemies. His targeting array scans for viable chumps...er Cons to assist him in this endeavor. Thrust will do for this...though Laserbeak can't quite process why he has a chair wrapped about his nosecone.

Combat: Laserbeak analyzes Americon for weaknesses Thrust can exploit.

Having finished his attack on Swindle, Americon swoops over to the Femaxian judge, who may or may not be dead, and swipes her mic! And also her top, to which the mic was pinned. Depending on your preferences that is either horrible or really hot. "OKAY, JERKS. I am seeing a distinct lack of AMERICAN SPIRIT in this fight, so..." He stands on the judges' dais in robot mode. "Ooohhhh ssayyyy can you seeeeee..." Yes, he's going to sing the national anthem. :(

Americon undergoes a patriotic transformation into his All-American robot mode!

Combat: Americon strikes Thrust with his Distract Attack Area attack!

Combat: That attack has temporarily impaired Thrust's Agility. (Crippled)

Combat: Americon strikes Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> with his Distract Attack Area attack!

Combat: That attack has temporarily impaired Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy>'s Agility. (Crippled)

Combat: Americon's Distract Attack attack on Swindle goes wild!

Combat: Americon strikes Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> with his Distract Attack Area attack!

Combat: That attack has temporarily impaired Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy>'s Agility. (Crippled)

Combat: Americon misses Laserbeak with his Distract Attack Area attack!

Swindle Smirks at Americon's namecalling. "You say that like it's a bad thing." Just before his position gets pummeled by rockets, disappearing into a big cloud of smoke of red white and blue! Exhaust intakes sputter as the Combaticon staggers out of the cloud, mouth covered with one hand. "This must be why everyone else has those fancy mouth guards."

Sees Americon go for the booth... and promptly pulls out a pair of earmuffs and tugs them on over his audials. "Aaah, sweet silence." A thumb flicks the setting on his pistol, which being the dirty scheming bastard he is, takes full advantage of Triggerhappy's frustrations.

The judge seems to be unconscious, which is a good thing because she might want to fight Americon for the mic otherwise. As the medics drag her off the field using a flatbed truck everyone is obliged to cover their ears lest they suffer likewise!

"ARGH! NO! STOP THAT HORRID NOISE!" Thrust exclaims, as Americon butchers the Star Spangled Banner worse than Roseanne Barr. He notices he's been given a bonus by a little birdy. "Thanks!" he radios back to Laserbeak, but realizes he has to recharge some energon before he can blast the other bird. "SOMEONE SHUT HIM UP ALREADY!"

Combat: Thrust takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

Galvatron winces at Americon, even from up there and through the force dome. "I do wonder, sometimes, what goes on behind Soundwave's visor."

Swindle Smirks at Americon's namecalling. "You say that like it's a bad thing." Just before his position gets pummeled by rockets, disappearing into a big cloud of smoke of red white and blue! Exhaust intakes sputter as the Combaticon staggers out of the cloud, mouth covered with one hand. "This must be why everyone else has those fancy mouth guards."

Sees Americon go for the booth... and promptly pulls out a pair of earmuffs and tugs them on over his audials. "Aaah, sweet silence." A thumb flicks the setting on his pistol, which being the dirty scheming bastard he is, takes full advantage of Triggerhappy's frustrations... by shooting the Conehead hopefully not expecting it while he dogs the dazed targetmaster instead.

Combat: Swindle strikes Thrust with his Because I'm a meanie that's why (Laser) attack!

Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy>'s systems are failing epically, and not only that, he didn't even manage to nail Thrust. He never really was good with ramming, was he. And on top of that, he is muddled by Americon's loud antics. Twice. "Oh for the love of Primus..." As if he hadn't taken enough damage to his systems already. "Yeah, yeah, I know Blowpipe, time to take cover again." He mutters, ducking behind a rock again and covering his audio receptors.

Triggerhappy reverts to his root form.

Combat: Triggerhappy sets his defense level to Protected.

Combat: Triggerhappy takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

SEVERAL YEARS AGO, DURING AMERICON'S CREATION

Soundwave stumbles about a laboratory, a sloshing enerhol cub in one hand and cassetticon parts in the other. "OH SAY CAN YOU SEEEEEEEEE," he harmonizes

NOW

Americon's voice gives out. "...in the home of theeeeee *KAFFKAFFFAAAGHHH*" He succumbs to a coughing fit, and sits down on the edge of the dais. "Guys, Imma take five if that's cool."

Combat: Americon takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

Thrust arghs as he's hit by Triggerhappy, but focuses on Americon. "Not soon enough, my audios are still ringing!" he retorts, firing his compressor guns. "Here, let me fill you so full of hot air that you FLOAT!"

Combat: Thrust strikes Americon with his Oh say can you SHUT IT?! attack! [Pulled -1]

From on high, the terror above that is who Laserbeak thinks he is, hears a noise. A song even....it seemed somewhat familiar. His memory banks open a long forgotten file. Soundwave was acting strange those years ago, having gone out for his evening's respite from intelligence gathering. Empty cans of spraypaint, pieces of cassettecon everywhere. Buzzsaw was pecking at part of it...as was Laserbeak of course, and being perpetually shooed away by the big blue bot and his bottle of Greasermeister. He absently puts the file aside...

Combat: Laserbeak takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

As Thrust deals with Americon for the moment and Triggerhappy ducks down for a breather, Swindle darts back for cover himself, resuming a defensive position behind some more outcroppings. "Iceland. And no ice or snow in sight. Whoever named this place must of been one slaggin' good schemer." ponders the mech to himself as he crouchs down, ejects the power clip to his pistol, and shoves a new one into it.

Combat: Swindle sets his defense level to Protected.

Combat: Swindle takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

Laserbeak eyes Americon again, his eyes flicker back to the more predatory red. There was still so much more payback to deliver. The earlier memory sparked something within him. With a dive, Laserbeak reenters the main battle area! Red glow trails behind him as he goes to the dais Americon chose to rest on, before pulling up sharply, nearly hovering as his talons come out, grasping seeking at the cassette. First comes the talons, then...then comes the pecking. The delicious, delicious pecking.

Galvatron drums his fingers on his crossed arms as he looks out across the battle- only Thrust is shooting! Everyone else seems to be ducking down and taking a little breather. "A lull in the battle," remarks Galvatron.

Combat: Laserbeak misses Americon with his Grab attack!

Americon is blasted off the dais with gust of compressed air, slamming into the flatbed truck and causing the poor Femaxian judge to fall off of it onto her face. The medical team yells angrily at him, but they scatter once Laserbeak goes for Americon! Americon transforms, hopping over Laserbeak then lunging back at him, talons extended! "CAW! CAW! CAW!" he shrieks, tearing and slashing.

Americon's robot legs pop out metallic feather-like objects as they and his lower torso split apart, also revealing an eagle head. The arms and robot head join the main body, and his guns convert into tail feathers and rocket launchers. Americon is now a bald eagle!

Combat: Robotic Bald Eagle <Americon> strikes Laserbeak with his Rooster Fight attack!

"COME ON! Stop hiding like mecha-mice and come out and fight like mechs!" Thrust calls out, "What's the matter? Too fast for your rusty servos?" He fires randomly at a couple of the cons that have taken cover.

Combat: Thrust strikes Swindle with his Full-Auto Area attack!

Combat: Thrust strikes Triggerhappy with his Full-Auto Area attack!

Having made sure that gun is ready Swindle stows it away again, and hits the reload trigger on his scatterblaster to make sure it's chamber is full with the remaining ammo, the weapon's barrel spinning a few times as the slots are filled and then locks back into place.

Once the munitions are ready Swindle leans up and peaks over his cover. "Time to take a page from Onslaught's book of tactics..." The Combaticon pushes himself to his feet and steps one foot up on the rock to brace himself, holds out his arm-cannon, and aims up at the Conehead to return fire even as the blasts rain down on him and Triggerhappy, riddling more holes in his armor.

Combat: Swindle sets his defense level to Neutral.

Triggerhappy watches Americon and Laserbeak go at it, which is actually quite amusing. He's getting pretty beat up, and it seems everyone else has also taken cover, save for the little guys. But then Thrust shoots at everyone, and Triggerhappy's endurance is suddenly running precariously low as Thrust's shots slam into his chassis. "Heh...fine if that's how you want to play it." It was time for some wild shooting, whether he hit someone or not. That was the fun part of it, anyway!

Triggerhappy transforms into a blue and white Cybertronian aircraft.

Combat: Swindle misses Thrust with his Counterattack! attack!

Bonecrusher is walked out by Hook and seated in the stands to watch. He looks sort of...drugged.

Combat: Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> sets his defense level to Fearless.

Combat: Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> misses Thrust with his Wild shooting 'cuz that's what best part anyway! (Full-Auto) Area attack!

Combat: Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> misses Swindle with his Wild shooting 'cuz that's what best part anyway! (Full-Auto) Area attack!

Combat: Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> misses Robotic Bald Eagle <Americon> with his Wild shooting 'cuz that's what best part anyway! (Full-Auto) Area attack!

Combat: Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> misses Laserbeak with his Wild shooting 'cuz that's what best part anyway! (Full-Auto) Area attack!

Laserbeak squawks and scowls, his wings flap as Americon takes the upper hand. It wasn't fair, Laserbeak was already hit TWICE now! Nevermind all the secondary damage he did to Americon, THIS was important. His feet kick out repeatedly as he snaps at the other bot. Fearful for his very life on the line, he simply waxes the clucker with his cannons. Fighting fair was for Bots...or for Cons that weren't Laserbeak!

Combat: Laserbeak sets his defense level to Neutral.

Combat: Laserbeak strikes Robotic Bald Eagle <Americon> with his Independently Targetable Laser Cannons attack!

Yes, Velum is here spectating for the Decepticon Free-For-All. Becaause honestly, what's better than watching a bunch of Cons beat the crap out of each other? Nothing, that's what. Knowing they can't touch her due to the treaty, the Nebulan has situated herself near the front of a sea of Cons, beaming as sits back, feat propping up on the chair in front of her, and sipping on some Nebu-brew while actually chatting a little with some of the smaller Cons that can actually tolerate speaking with her.

ZOT! Laser beams sear Americon's chest and he's forced to hop away from his avian adversary. Then the pain jars something in his mind... a memory flashes before him. He remembers... being on a table... Soundwave was working on him... then he turned away... and some ugly red bird hopped up next to him, and started pecking something up above his field of vision. Wait, was he pecking... his brain!?

*KILL BILL SIREN! KILL BILL SIREN!*

"Laserbeak, you sonuva... you bas... you JERK!" Americon screams, launching dozens of rockets at Laserbeak. "YOU MADE ME RETARDED!"

Combat: Robotic Bald Eagle <Americon> misses Laserbeak with his Rockets' Red Glare attack!

"You call that a counterattack? That was pathetic!" Thrust taunts as his attackers miss. "Come on, let me show you a REAL attack!" He fires at Swindle. "Maybe you ought to get yourself some life insurance?"

Combat: Thrust strikes Swindle with his Laser attack!

Swindle has to cut short his attempt at blasting back in order to dive out of the way when Triggerhappy decides to get in on the gunning as well. He hits the dirt and tumbles a bit before finally getting back up, clear of the strafing. "Boy what I wouldn't give for a rocket launcher right now," grouses the gunrunner with a glare towards the judge's booth. Then shrugs it off. Smoke hisses from the scattergun as it chungs and rechambers, even as Thrust continues to blast away at him. "I'll have you all know I am a firm supporter of gun control..." Stands up, aims his weapon, and opens fire with another barrage. "The one with the biggest guns is in control!"

Right now Laserbeak is probably really glad he paid off Swindle with that earlier help.

Combat: Swindle sets his defense level to Fearless.

Combat: Swindle strikes Thrust with his Scatterblaster Spreadfire Area attack! [Pulled -1]

Combat: Swindle misses Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> with his Scatterblaster Spreadfire Area attack! [Pulled -1]

Combat: Swindle strikes Robotic Bald Eagle <Americon> with his Scatterblaster Spreadfire Area attack! [Pulled -1]

Combat: Robotic Bald Eagle <Americon> falls to the ground, unconscious.

Cybertronian Turbo-Thrust Jet Fighter <Triggerhappy> had prepared himself to be knocked into stasis lock this round, especially when Swindle let loose with that barrage from his scatterblaster again. But the blow never came. "....I'm...I'm still up?!"

"We're still up?!" Blowpipe echoes. "No fragging way! HAHAHAHH!" he laughs and again ducks behind that trusty rock.

Triggerhappy reverts to his root form.

Combat: Triggerhappy sets his defense level to Protected.

Robotic Bald Eagle <Americon> takes a spread of shrapnel across his chest. He stares down at his chest, then looks up, looking... regretful? Sorrowful?

o/~Mmm whatcha saaaay? Mmh, that you only meant welll, well of course you did.

Americon drops down to his birdie knees, then slumps forward onto his face with a final "BAWK."

Combat: Triggerhappy takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

Laserbeak peers down at Americon's stasis locked form. That...was more like it. He squawks quietly as he reassesses himself. He's...injured, but after reminding himself of the nature of the fight...well he'd better not get shot again. Americon's rocket launcher looks quite interesting. He claws at it several times with his talons, such a stran... FOOM! Red, white and blue rockets fire off, making Laserbeak hop backwards in surprise and fear. He really had no care for where they were going since Galvatron was well off to the side.

Combat: Laserbeak misses Triggerhappy with his Accidental Rocket Discharge! (Laser) attack!

Thrust is hit again, cursing momentarily. But then he sees Americon fall. "HAW HAW!" he laughs, sounding suspiciously like a certain Springfield bully. He flies around, then decides on a target. "How about I put you out of your misery?" he says to Triggerhappy. "You can join Misfire in Learn How to Shoot school!"

Combat: Thrust strikes Triggerhappy with his Laser attack!

Combat: Triggerhappy falls to the ground, unconscious.

The rockets come Triggerhappy's way, but his cover protects him, and the rockets explode helplessly against it. Needless to say, they -did- belong to Americon, who was only a cassetticon. Didn't take so much rocket science to figure out that it probably wouldn't have the firepower to blast through. Still, he pops out from behind it momentarily to squeeze off a shot at a random target. He'd have to be -really- lucky to land anything, what with the state of disrepair his targeting systems were in, but hell, what did he have to lose, anyway? After all, he was already having pretty good luck so far, since he hadn't yet gotten taken down despite being on the literal verge of stasis locking. Maybe luck would stay on his side for this. After all, that's what he loved doing best, shooting. That's what he was -here- for. But just as he's about to pull the trigger, Thrust nails him in the chest. He collapses to the ground, stasis locked. Blowpipe shakes his head. "I -knew- that was a bad idea..." The nebulan mutters.

Swindle watchs Americon crumple to the ground as he holds up his smoking weapon. "You're welcome," he remarks to Laserbeak with that shyster smirk of his. Shifts as he hears laser fire behind them, but Thrust is trying to flush out Triggerhappy instead. Well that's a handy distraction. Redrawing his smaller pistol, he points it after the conehead and snaps off another burst of destabilizing energy.

Combat: Swindle sets his defense level to Neutral.

Combat: Swindle misses Thrust with his I have no qualms about shooting a mech in the back attack!

Laserbeak looks over his shoulder, following the rockets. Did he just....drop Triggerhappy on accident? He scans the area quicky, where WAS everyone? He shortens his neck in a facsimilie of a 'gulp'....It was getting very...dangerous again. Swindle was still up, damaged, but he'll do...he'd have to, or else things would get so much worse and FAST.

Combat: Laserbeak sets his defense level to Protected.

Combat: Laserbeak analyzes Thrust for weaknesses Swindle can exploit.

Thrust feels like someone got missile lock on him! He flies high up into the sky, transforms, and fires a missile at Swindle! "Oh no, you don't get me!" he shouts.

Thrust's arms retract, his legs half-retract and fuse, and his cockpit flips out and over his head.

Combat: VTOL-modified F-15 <Thrust> misses Swindle with his Cluster Bombs attack!

"He put on a fine show of the Empire's strength," Swindle remarks, eyeing Triggerhappy's final resting spot for a moment. Shame he's not allowed to sell off the losers! "But back to matters at hand." As Laserbeak does the spy thing he smirks as Thrust takes off and unloads a burst of bombs. "Now you see, any soldier can point a gun and shoot." Raising both weapons, Swindle fires his gyro gun with one hand, using the magnetic pulse to deflect the bombs away from them. "But a -good- soldier knows more than one way to make his weapons useful!" Then as those go off to make big holes in the ground hefts his arm-cannon and fires back at the jet through the rising smoke.

Combat: Swindle sets his defense level to Aggressive.

Combat: Swindle strikes VTOL-modified F-15 <Thrust> with his Boom Boom Boom attack!

VTOL-modified F-15 <Thrust>'s tailfins sizzle and he starts to lose altitude. "NOOOOOOOOOO!" he exclaims, taking a sharp dive. Maybe if he's lucky he'll buzz Swindle with a sonic boom!

Combat: VTOL-modified F-15 <Thrust> strikes Swindle with his Turbofan Sonic Boom attack!

Combat: Swindle falls to the ground, unconscious.

Combat: VTOL-modified F-15 <Thrust>'s risky attack leaves him temporarily incapacitated!

"Victory to the bold!" Galvatron exclaims with relish as Thrust goes for the gusto and pays it off, even though he cuts his own engines doing it!

Laserbeak scampers about near Americon's stasis locked form. Easy...easy...He shuffles off to the side. The trick was to draw no more attention for now. No one still functional knew what he was up to aside from Swindle...Still, Thrust was starting to look bad now....and...oh slag....Slag slag slag slag slag slag. Swindle was down, Thrust was...incapacitated. Seriously? Laserbeak peeks over the rock. Thrust was actually down! Vital signs were strong but....was this a trap? Was this..a joke? He hops over, chirruping quietly as he investigates.

Laserbeak actually lands next to the fallen Thrust, then around. This...couldn't really be happening. He considers the situation at hand for just a moment. His autocannons roar as he prays that this is enough to finish the job....

Combat: Laserbeak sets his defense level to Neutral.

Combat: Laserbeak strikes VTOL-modified F-15 <Thrust> with his Independently Targetable Laser Cannons attack!

VTOL-modified F-15 <Thrust> plows noseconefirst into the ground and just lays there. He doesn't even feel it when Laserbeak's attack hits him.

Combat: VTOL-modified F-15 <Thrust> takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

Swindle may not be into war for the same reasons the rest of his team is, but the efforts of this fight have been a thrill all the same. "Com'n big guy, give me your best sho--" Except Thrust decides to buzzbomb them instead. "--Ah slag!" The jet blasts past, the sonic shockwave flinging the already battered Combaticon into a pile of rocks with a metal snapping crunch. And leaves him kinda stuck there as he weakly holds up an arm. "And this... is why... you always.. have.. insurance..."

Followed by him coming loose from the stone side and falling flat on his face.

Driven by panic of retribution, Laserbeak continues the roaring fire. He hops from side to side anxiously, giving every ounce of firepower he has left. If Thrust would get back up, that would be it. He'd fly up to Galvatron and resign right then and there, but Thrust is STILL DOWN! Laserbeak squawks in a combination of fear and persistence.

Combat: Laserbeak misses VTOL-modified F-15 <Thrust> with his Independently Targetable Laser Cannons attack!

VTOL-modified F-15 <Thrust> wakes up at that moment! Just in time to transform and get out of the way of Laserbeak's attack! "NOOOOOO!" he shouts, leaping into the air, and firing at the buzzard while he tries to put as much distance betweeen himself and beaky as possible!

Thrust folds out back into robot mode, his cockpit folding against his chest, his wings reverse, and his arms pop out.

Combat: Thrust strikes Laserbeak with his Compressor Guns attack!

An armored Doc-In-The-Box prepaid private ambulance screeches out from the pit area onto the field, sirens whooping! It parks by Swindle and a squad of black-armored mercenary aliens jump out to form a perimeter around Swindle. Masked cleansuited medics clamber around to attend to him while power lifters settle the client carefully into the ambulance. In a flash it's off the field again, whooping and blaring.

Laserbeak panicks, squawking! Thrust's counterattack was just as horrid as he had expected. Even as he gets into flight, shots ring out over him, causing him to wobble and skid to the ground. He hops up onto the dais that Galvatron commands from, then onto the big boss' shoulder. It was over...the nightmare was over. So he lost...he was alive...

Swindle is carried off the field of battle. In style. Normally he's the one -chasing- ambulances, but this just proves that it's worth paying those extensive premiums.

".............I win? I win! I WIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN!" Thrust suddenly realizes what happened and raises his arms high above his head, gloating like this is what he expected all along. "I AM THE CHAMPION!"

Galvatron raises an arm to let Laserbeak alight. "A silver medalist. Soundwave would be pleased, I think," he muses, and raises his voice to address the crowd. "The bronze medal goes to Swindle, silver to Laserbeak, and Thrust will receive the gold! Let our enemies fear us! The games are completed- go to whatever filthy organic holes you come from!"

The audience applauds uncertainly. That didn't sound very festive, but... well, all right.

Laserbeak considers investing in some of Swindle's insurance. Scowling at the one who shot him, his cannons train on Thrust. Noticing the crowd's lack of applause, the bird scowls. He was put in the most Herculean struggle of all time. He fires a few shots into the ground, well within the guidelines of the arena's policy for spectators, but close enough to the edge to encourage a bit more...receptive accolades.

The onlookers start running. That was good enough.

Laserbeak will devour eight petrolrats after this, in celebration. Then some more petty vandalism, maybe some blackmail....and some good looming outside the Autobot camp. It was shaping up to be a good day...as soon as Soundwave repaired him.