Ryan In the Afternoon



 Buzzkill says, "Razor was...an Autobot?"

 Octane says, "Looks like it. The nerve of these guys."

 Buzzkill says, "But.."

 Buzzkill says, "But I refueled him.."

 Buzzkill says, "I..oh Primus..I think I'm going to be sick.."

 Octane says, "Oh... Oh sweet-bot. You need to get yourself tested."

 Octane says, "Do you know what low-grade swill those mechs use? Horrible!"

 Buzzkill says, "Ugh...I..just uuuuuuughhhhhhhh..."

 Buzzkill can be heard throwing up.

 Scorn says, "Buzzkill..."

 Octane says, "That's right, get it all out."

 Buzzkill says, "Hrk-!"

 Octane says, "See, you gotta be careful where you stick your nozzle. Like Junks. Never fuel a Junk. You'll be scrubbin' off the rust for solar cycles."

 Scorn says, "When you're finished purging, visit my wuarters. I need help moving out some... broken furniture."

 Buzzkill says, "Y-yes..of course.."

<Decepticon> Scorn says, "And bring some highgrade. I think we'll both need it."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Hey, folks, and welcome to Ryan in the Afternoon. Now, I don't know if you've noticed, but we've had some aliens living among us. For, oh, fifty years now. And tonight, you get to ask them your questions. This is going to be a chance you won't want to miss. Can I ask you to introduce yourselves?"

<Earth> Velum says, "Thanks for having us on, Ryan. Glad to be here to answer some of the things people are always wondering. Corporal Velum of the EDC here, and also resident Nebulan."

<Earth> Blades says, "Uh. I'm Blades. I'm a Protectobot. I do Air Support. I turn into a Bell UH-1V Iroquois and also a giant arm."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "And not only that, we do have one representative of good old Homo Sapiens with us too, from the EDC, Ford Bennett. So, why don't we start with you? Our audience can't see us, unless they're watching our podcast, but you've worked with both Autobots and Nebulans for years. Can you describe, for those of us who haven't, what that's like?""

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Well, hello ladies of radio land. Good to be in so much lovely company, and at the same time too~..."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "For those of you who haven't joined the EDC, I will say this... it's unique."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "It's honestly not too different from working an office, really. You wake up, head in for work, deal with your boss and head back to bed at the end of the day. I suppose the only difference is, a typical day of work is either training or getting shot at."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Ironically, humans have our own protection: you'd be surprised how lousy shots giant robots are."

<Earth> Velum snorts, "And that's what makes it far more exciting."

<Earth> Blades says, "Guns are for cowards, anyway."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Oh, and my female co-workers are prettier."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Hey, I take pride in my giant gun."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "...and my rifle too."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Thank you, that was, again, Velum the Nebulan and Blades the Protectobot. How interesting of you to say that guns are for cowards. Would you tell us more about your pacifict principles?"

<Earth> Blades breaks down laughing hysterically.

<Earth> Velum says, "Kinda the wrong Bot to be asking, Ryan."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Ah, that reminds me."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Kids, if you plan to sign on with the EDC, be prepared to deal with giant loony robots. A lot of them..."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Well, uh, we'll come back to that later. We have a caller. Regis from Alameda. Regis, you had a question for Velum, the Nebulan?"

<Earth> Blades says, "You have me confused with First Aid. Heh. Heh heh. Oh wow... I mean, uh. Look. Transformers are really, really hard to kill, okay? If you shoot one and he falls over, he's probably not dead. He's probably gonna be fine, and if he's a Decepticon, he's gonna go on to kill a LOT of good people."

<Earth> Blades says, "- yeah, well, I'll conclude that later."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Oh, excuse me, thank you, Blades. Regis, sorry, now you can ask?"

<Earth> Velum says, "A caller for me? Well then, afternoon, caller. Ask away!"

<Earth> Repugnus, trying to muffle his voice a bit, says, "Ahem, actually it wasn't for Velum so much as it was about her. Uh, Mr. Benett? Have you noticed any... weird mushrooms growing on your skin?... This is really important."

<Earth> Velum says, "......What"

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Well, if you don't get what that was about, I certainly don't!"

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "No, my looks are as impeccable as ever. I can't say the same for Corporal Velvet here, but if she's inclined, I'd be happy to give a more thorough search."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "You sound like you were expecting some. I make it a habit not to disappoint, but in this case, I'm afraid I'll have to make an exception."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Any particular reason why?"

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Ford Bennett, ladies and gentlemen, demonstrating the EDC's legal immunity to sexual harrassment laws."

<Earth> Repugnus says, "Uh, that might be a bad idea, that thorough search. Well, you see, the thing is, Nebulans? I know you probably didn't know this, but they reproduce by spores. And the more you hang around a Nebulan, the more the spores grow on you. And eventually, little Nebulan babies start to grow at the roots of the mushrooms, right inside your own body, until they're ready to burst free. What kind of soap do you use? I'd recommend a sporicidal soap."

<Earth> Repugnus says, "I mean, they may look like humans, but they're not humans at all. Didn't you know that?"

<Earth> Velum can be heard grabbing the mic, "Alright, who are you and where did you hear that load? That's all lies!"

<Earth> Repugnus says, "Don't believe her! She just wants you to bear her progeny! In your skiiiin!"

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "All right, that was Regis from Alameda. Thank you, Regis, and good-bye. So, Blades, back to you. You're not just a Protectobot, with very different opinions from your 'brothers,' you're also one-fifth of someone else, Defensor. Can you tell the rest of us what that's like?""

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Nothing a little extra strength protection can't solve, I imagine."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "I'm not in the habit of using protection either, buuuuuuuut I do have an image to keep up."

<Earth> Velum says, "Ford, please, don't listen to that guy. I mean it when I say it isn't true."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Remember, folks: EDC personnel sadly are not immune to disease, including fungus."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Invincible though we may seem."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Like I said, kids, if you sign on with the EDC, you're signing up for a bit of lunacy too."

<Earth> Blades says, "It's kind of difficult to explain. Defensor's his own person, too. He's not just what happens when you add us all up, y'know? I mean, if you tried that, you'd get... slag, I dunno. The Village People. But... Defensor's the best of all of us, too."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "That's very interesting, Blades. How much do your minds mesh and merge? Do you know everything your brothers do? Can you still think your own thoughts and hear theirs?"

<Earth> Blades says, "It's kinda... nice, being a part of something better than myself. I guess. Though it's more than anyone could ever live up to. Except maybe Hot Spot. I don't know where he gets his energy. Maybe a black hole. I can't say I know /everything/ they know. I'm sure not a doctor or a detective or a firefighter or a... uh... morale officer. Cough. But there's bleedover. I wouldn't hide Groove's spare tyres as a prank and then merge. Not that I've ever done that. Definitely not. I can't speak for the others, but when we're merged, though... I'm definitely not me anymore. I'm a subprocess in a greater whole."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Now, don't take this the wrong way, but, how do I put this to a guy who's got fourteen feet on me, you don't sound only a fifth as smart as Defensor."

<Earth> Blades says, "That's kinda what I've been saying. Merging isn't additive. It's more like, hng... actually, do you know those construction toy things? Little colourful blocks? Yeah, and you can take apart a fire station set and build something totally different out of it, like... a dragon? Defensor's like that. Take the best pieces out of us Protectobots, put them together, and you get something totally different and unique: Defensor."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "I had a totally different thought in mind, but that ones PG, so that one works better."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Actually, I've got a query for Velvet, if she's willing to answer it."

<Earth> Velum says, "Hm.. Alright, shoot."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "You're a... Nebulan, right?"

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "How do Nebulans handle... relationships, as it were."

<Earth> Velum says, "Well... pretty similar to humans, I suppose. We date, get married, have kids, so on and so forth. Nothing all that special or 'alien', really."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont breaks in with, "Okay, Velum, another question for you, back on the topic of bonding. Nebulans can binary-bond with Autobots, too, and in fact that's why most of you on Earth are here. Have you ever done that, yourself?"

<Earth> Velum says, "Me, oh no. Or actually, sort of. I signed up to take part in the process, but didn't see it through, unfortunately. Can't say I regret it though, since now I'm with the EDC and pretty happy."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Can you tell us a little bit more about how you did come to Earth with them, then? And why you didn't see it through?"

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "I'm sorry, you lost me back there. What is binary bonding?"

<Earth> Blades says, "It's where you jam a Nebulan in your gun, head, or engine in the name of teamwork."

<Earth> Blades says, "Now, if you could stick them in knives, maybe I'd be interested..."

<Earth> Velum chuckles, "Well, half right, Blades. We undergo a surgery of sorts. Heavy internal modifications so we can wear special suits and not die when we transform into special parts that link up with a Cybertronian and enhance their abilities. And I didn't see it through because I had a few other commitments on my homeworld that I didn't want to abandon, though I couldn't stay out of the fight long and finally decided to come to Earth a bit later than the other Masters.

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Better late the never, right?"

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Thanks, Velum. That was Velum, talking about her past on the planet Nebulan. If you just tuned in, we also have the Protectobot, Blades, and someone else from the EDC. Our next caller is from LA"

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Do you prefer Sigmund or Ziggy?"

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "It's been my experience that, on the whole, women do not place much value in getting things done quickly..."

<Earth> Zigzag, with his voice raised an octave, says, "Yeah, hi there Ryan. Long time listener, first time caller. I usually just go by Zack. Big fan and all that. Anyway, I have a question for the Autobots and EDCers on the line. There's been a lot of confusion about what happened with the return of Mr. Neeson and Mr. Lucas. A lot of weird rumours about where they were and how they got back, but there's been no official statement. Could either Ms. Velum, Mr. Benett, or Blades dispel some of these rumours and set the record straight?"

<Earth> Velum clears her throat a little, "Ah, it's Nebulos, Ryan."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Yes, folks, that was the Earthling who said that, not some alien who just saw a woman for the first time two days ago."

<Earth> Blades says dryly, "You'd have to ask one of my superiors about that. I'm just Air Support. Call me if you got a bear menacing some hikers."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "That depends on what the rumors say. I think Lawnmower here was in on that, so he'd be the better talker here..."

<Earth> Blades says, "..."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "I heard he did a real cut-up job though, so, good work, big guy."

<Earth> Velum says, "Neeson and Lucas? Sorry, I'm not much into their films, so don't have much comment."

<Earth> Blades says, "LAWNMOWER!?"

<Earth> Velum says, "..Good job, Benett"

<Earth> Zigzag says, "Lawnmower? You mean Blades?"

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Hey, some nicknames may be temporary"

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "I only have so many hours in the day to modify the list."

<Earth> Zigzag says, "You were in on the mission, Blades? You gotta tell us all about it."

<Earth> Blades says, "Of all the the... /just/ because I'm an airframe doesn't mean that you can crack out modist slurrs!"

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "I wasn't aware I was being offensive."

<Earth> Blades says, "Y'like being called a monkey?"

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Typically, and people who know me know this very well, if I use someone's real name, it's one of two things."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "A) the situation is serious."

<Earth> Velum says, "Alright, enough you two, we're here to answer questions, not argue."

<Earth> Ford Benett suddenly sounding deathly serious. "Or B) ...I don't f***ing like you."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "And yeah, at least someone's putting SOME effort into a nickname for me."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Mickey's the only one who actually bothers to give me one."

<Earth> Zigzag says, "Uh, ok, maybe getting off topic here. So how about Mr. Neeson and Mr. Lucas, huh?"

<Decepticon> Needlenose says, "Smooth."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Ask him, he was on the mission. I just read the report, which, naturally, was a huge success"

<Decepticon> Zigzag says, "Shut up."

<Earth> Blades says, "Ooookay, Monkey. Whatever you want. - An' I told you. You'd have to ask one of my superiors."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Okay, on to the next topic. Thanks to Zack, who wanted to know about the two directors rescued last week by the Autobots. And all lovers of the cinema will forgive you. Ford, back to you. Have you ever worked with Rodimus Prime? What's he like?"

<Decepticon> Needlenose golf claps.

<Decepticon> Zigzag says, "I said shut up!"

<Decepticon> Needlenose says, "Sunbeam, you're up."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Haven't worked with the hot rod yet. I look forward to it, though. No many cars look that good to ride in, so I'm hyped."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "I've found the higher you get on the EDC ladder, the more paperwork you get."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "So higher ups like Roddy and F-- ...the general... don't see much action. That, or I'm just getting bum missions."

<Earth> Blades says, "Rodimus Prime is fine. Y'know. All leadery."

<Earth> Blades says, "I kinda try to aaaavooid getting his notice? Because he's... so very busy with important things. Yes."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "You're just afraid of the limelight is all."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Blades, you mentioned Hot Rod before? What about him and your other brothers? Any dirt to dish?"

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "'Scuzi, Hot Spot."

<Earth> Blades says, "Those names are nothing alike! ... at least not in Cybertronian, I guess I can see how you'd get them confused in English. Hmph. I dunno, if they were here, they'd probably tell me to encourage people to donate blood to the Red Cross, because just one donation can save three lives?"

<Earth> Blades does not discuss Groove's... habits in public.

<Earth> Velum says, "I kinda like that Hot Spot guy. I appreciate how gung-ho he is."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Shockingly for anyone who doesn't work with giant robots every day, they start to look the same after a while."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Which I can only imagine is lovingly reciprocated by them."

<Earth> Blades says, "Oh, for slag's sake, one's a baby blue firetruck, and one's a.. a... a... HOT ROD!"

<Earth> Velum says, "Well, they have different paintjobs, so they wouldn't be /that/ hard to mix up I imagine"

<Earth> Blades says, "That's gotta be like confusing a fireman with a Dallas Cheerleader."

<Earth> Velum laughs

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Ford, Velum, what would you say was your most memorable mission as part of the EDC. And, be honest, were you playing second fiddle to the Autobots?"

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Well, I've only had a few so far. I've started active duty a few weeks back once training finished up for the Rangers."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "In every case, I've been the frontline and gone toe-to-toe with bots on my own. And obviously I've walked away to tell the tale."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "But considering my training, it'd be an embarassment if I didn't."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "You'd have to kill me, wouldn't you? Okay, we've got a new caller, 'Sunbeam,' from 'uh, somewhere.' Sounds like Berkeley to me; am I close?"

<Earth> Velum says, "Most memorable mission? Hmm... So far, I think that'd have to be when I helped defend the newly rebuilt Retoris against the Decepticon attack. Had a nasty scuffle with Brawl, thogh I did enjoy punching his face into the pavement before he hit me with--Wait what? Sunbeam?!"

<Earth> Sunbeam says, "Hey. Sure, man, Berkeley works. So what's up? What's up, all? Everyone doing cool?" Sunbeam waits a moment and then nods, "Cool. Anyhow, I heard the most sensual voice on the radio and just had to call in with some questions. So, like, question numero uno: Velum, red wine or white?"

<Decepticon> Needlenose says, "You used your real name?!"

<Decepticon> Needlenose says, "You asked about /wine/?!"

<Decepticon> Sunbeam says, "Priorities, dude."

<Earth> Velum hisses a little under her breath, "Seriously? This is how you're bothering me now? I swear the the maker... Ergh, fine, I'll go along /for now/. Red.

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Good choice~"

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Healthier for you, or at least for humans. Okay, next caller is Bill from San Jose. Bill?"

<Earth> Brawl says, "Er-hrm... that's close enough. Yeah, I just had something for Ms. Velum?"

<Earth> Sunbeam says, "Red, sweet. Me too. Ok, so question numero dos: A steak house or Korean food?"

<Earth> Sunbeam plans to keep asking questions unless he's cut off.

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Sorry, Kate, could you cut him and go to Bill? Thanks. Sorry, Bill?"

<Earth> Velum says, "....Steak house. And sure, caller?"

<Earth> Brawl says, "LISTEN UP, YOU UGLY PILE OF SCRAP, WHEN I GET MY CROSSHAIRS ON YOU AGAIN, I'M GONNA RIP YOUR ARMS OFF AND BEAT YOU LIFELESS WITH THEM! THEN I'M GONNA TAKE THEM AND *@!&# THEM UP YOU (*#(*@ING @!**& YOU DIRTY LITTLE @!&*#!!!"

<Earth> Velum says, "What the hell?!"

<Earth> Blades says, "...Brawl, I will bleed you out."

<Earth> Blades says, "I will paint the ground with your fuel."

<Earth> Sunbeam says, "Whoa, Brawl man. We can work on some calming t-" but is then cut off, much to the disappointment of the entire female population of Earth.

<Earth> Velum says, "Brawl?! Get off the line before I come over there and shove your ugly mug back in the asphalt!!"

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Ooh, sorry you had to hear that. We have another caller, Ari Pugnus. Wonder who that could be. Ari?"

<Decepticon> Needlenose says, "Jeez, Brawl. u mad, bro?"

<Earth> Repugnus says, "Yeah, I got a question for Velum. What's with the giant arm? Combine accident or something? Or is there actually a little midget arm inside there, controlling it?"

<Decepticon> Brawl is just huffing angrily as he slams down the line... apparently shattering it

<Decepticon> Needlenose says, "Eeeesh... well I know who I'm steering clear of for the next week."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "For those of you at home: I didn't mention it, but Velum has a prosthetic arm."

<Decepticon> Brawl says, "Swear to Primus, Velum is #37 on my hit list..."

<Decepticon> Brawl says, "Hang on, where did I put it..."

<Earth> Velum sighs, "Somehow I knew this would come up. I lost it in battle on Nebulos after the Zarak/Galen split. And no, there's no little arm or anything."

<Earth> Repugnus says, "Ohhhh. Ever killed any boyfriends with it?"

<Decepticon> Brawl says, "Have the stupid thing around here somewhere. Brand new box of crayons with it too... I'm gonna be /really/ mad if I lost that"

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "All right, that'll be our last caller for a bit. Blades, I have another question for you. How do you see this war ending?"

<Earth> Velum actually pauses for a few seconds on this, "..No, but I wish I had with one."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "Oh, she's single. Good to know...~"

<Earth> Blades says, "...in a whole lot of war crimes trials. Loads. You have no idea."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "If it does not include us winning, I'm gonna be disappointed."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont chuckles a bit. "Same here, Ford, but Blades, do you see any prospect of a peace settlement? Or, if the only way to end it is a total victory, is that in sight?"

<Earth> Velum says, "Well said, Blades"

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Okay, if we can stay on this topic a little longer, maybe we can get some calls that my producers have screened ahead of time. Suppose the Decepticons did tell you tomorrow, we've had a coup, here's our peace offer. What do you think Rodimus Prime would accept, and what do you think he should accept?"

<Decepticon> Rampage says, "Just write a new one."

<Decepticon> Rampage says, "With a knife. In someone's face."

<Decepticon> Brawl says, "I haven't found any new paper for it."

<Decepticon> Brawl says, "I'm not good at writing with a knife..."

<Decepticon> Rampage says, "Pfft!"

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "I myself only know of Roddy and my superiors from the tales I've heard in training. So I can only say what they as the legends they are would do. But I imagine they'd hear it out. And heck, may even accept, if the conditions were suitable."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "I'm with Chopter on this one; I cannot believe ALL the Cons are bad. It's the same way I can't believe ALL Autobots are good, or all members of the EDC are good. A few bad apples can spoil the whole bunch."

<Earth> Blades says, "To be honest, we'd probably assume it was all a trick. We've gotten burned more times than I wanna count on fakeouts like that. But the Prime's a smart guy, so maybe he'd play along and try to figure out what their angle was before they figure out that we know what they're up to. If it was sincere... slag, it'd take a whole lot of proof. Conditions? They had /better/ include something to stop all the Cybertronian rights violations going on in Decepticon territory..."

<Earth> Ford Benett says, "The Cons just... have a lot of bad apples."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Once again, you're listening to Ryan in the Afternoon, where two out of our three guests are an Autobot and a Nebulan from, you said, Nebulos?"

<Earth> Velum says, "That's right."

Members of channel <O-Decepticon> are:

Brawl, Buzzsaw, Contrail, Dead End, Fever, Fortress Maximus, Fusillade, Galvatron, Harrow, Outbound, Rampage, Shockwave, Victory Leo

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "So, Velum--she's the one from Nebulos, folks, with the lovely voice, and if you can't see her, the even lovelier face--Is this the Nebulans' fight? Are you in it for the long haul, and why?"

Outbound's rank/title is 1/. Division: Infantry.

<Earth> Velum says, "Lovely? Oh, well thank you, Ryan~. And it's our fight now, since we found our people split and one side joining the Decepticons. So naturally, the others joined the Bots and we've been in it ever since. And yeah, I'd say I'm in it until the end, whatever that may be."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "We're almost out of time, but we do have another caller. Earl, from San Francisco?"

<Earth> Velum says, "And honestly, I'm not afraid if we lose. Because I know I fought the good fight."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Earl from San Francisco, are you there?"

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Okay, folks, pardon the dust, but it looks like we've lost touch with both Earl and Ford Bennett from the EDC, but there are plenty of other humans to talk to. We'll try to get them back, but here's another human now with a question that's actually been screened first. Ada Furst from Bakersfield, you're on?"

<Earth> Ada Furst says, "Thanks Ryan. Just wanted everyone's opinion on the EDC's long term role in the conflict: How far are we willing to go to keep fighting? On Earth, of course there's a huge EDC presence. On Cybertron the EDC occasionally sees action. But what if the front lines moves away from Earth to some other Godforsaken backwater planet? Is the EDC willing to send their soldiers across the galaxy to fight the Decepticons, or will we stay home so long as Earth is safe?"

<Earth> Blades says, "As far as I'm concerned, if we can get the 'cons off Earth for good, there's no need for the humans to waste their lives all over the galaxy. They've already done more than enough for us. More than we can ever pay back."

<Earth> Velum says, "I'd have to agree with Blades. Really, I'm not quite sure what the decision would be if something like that came up. I'm sure any who wanted to follow the fight would be allowed. I certainly would."

<Earth> Whirl says, "I say the EDC is in this for the long run. If we're fighting the Decepticons on some random planet in the middle of nowehere and we need the support, they should pack into their little shuttles and come on down."

<Earth> Whirl says, "Plus, it gives them a chance to explore the universe which is always exciting, right?"

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Now that I think about it, Velum, you already have followed the fight to the other end of the galaxy."

<Earth> Ada Furst hmms, "Follow up question for Velum: the scenario I put forth is very similar to the one Nebulos now faces. I... well, Ryan knows what I'm trying to say, I think."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "That was Earl, folks, Earl from San Francisco. Earl, you're back on the line; did you have a question?"

<Earth> Velum says, "It was hard to leave Nebulos, and I'm sure it'd be hard for any humans wanting to leave Earth too. But at least I have somewhere to go back to, knowing it's now safe, instead of fighting from my front step day in and day out."

<Earth> Whirl,in his most convincing redneck voice says, "Uhh yeah, I got a question for the Nebulan. Is it true y'all are actually lizard people in disguise sent here to ruin the economy and take over the world?'

<Earth> Velum says, "...Lizard people? What? Of course not, we look much more like you humans, aside from some skin and hair color differences sometimes. And /no/, we're just here to protect you from the Cons and our traitors."

<Earth> Velum says, "I'm starting question your peoples' screening abilities, Ryan"

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "You and me both, Velum, you and me both. You've been introduced to our delightful custom of Rule Thirty Four. All right, we have a new caller, Ed Forrest. Ed?"

<Earth> Velum says, "Rule thirthy four? ...Your human internet tells me otherwise.. but alright."

<Earth> Ed Forrest says, "Heya Ryan. Huge fan of your show. Huge fan. So a question for all the panelists: We recently had the EDC, shall I say, 'taken over' by an extremist hyper-militant leader who favoured an all offence, no-mercy kind of approach to the war. It nearly got us all killed. Do you guys think there's any danger of the opposite happening? Peaceniks getting their way and trying to make a deal with the Cons to leave us alone? Energon to the Decepticons if they stop their attacks on Earth?"

<Earth> Blades says, "I /like/ to think you humans are too smart to try that."

<Earth> Ed Forrest says, "I guess I'm asking if there's any way the UN or the EDC would cave in and support appeasement."

<Earth> Blades says, "And keep in mind, I rescue people who have gotten stuck in avalanches and stuff."

<Earth> Velum says, "There's always the possibility, sure. Some people can only go so far before giving in. But I like to believe, as a whole, our military is strong and wouldn't stand for something like that if our leaders decided it."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "You think there's anybody left who didn't learn the lesson of Red Dawn?"

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Interesting. So, as an EDC officer, you're saying that a peace settlement would lead to a mutiny? Or even a coup?"

<Earth> Ed Forrest says, "Memories can be short. Red Dawn was horrible and I hope people don't forget it, but that isn't quite what I mean. Not the Cons pretending they're good, but the Cons could setting up a protection racket kind of deal."

<Earth> Blades is called off because someone needs a medevac!

<Earth> Velum says, "This is like the previous question about the Bots and Cons reaching peace. It'd be scrutinised heavily, in my opinion, since Cons aren't exactly known for their protective nature and such. And who would even need to be protected or need to strike deals? Well.. more nefarious minded, I suppose, but still."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "Okay, I think we'd better move on. Everyone, let's all send some warm fuzzy thoughts to Blades and the Protectobots, who has to leave for a medivac. That leaves us with one remaining guest, Velum of Nebulos, and I'm very glad I brought three, and time for one more caller. Our next and last question of the day is from Sid Tarif. Sid?"

<Earth> Sid Tarif says, "--hello? Hello? Sorry, can you hear me? I'm on a cell phone! Wait, I think it just cleared. Question for Velum for her alien perspective. How come the rest of the galaxy doesn't, y'know, man the f<BLEEP> up and join forces with the Autobots to wipe the Decepticons out once and for all? The whole motherf<BLEEP>ing galaxy could do it!"

<Earth> Velum says, "A good question, though I ask it myself all the time. I'm sure they have their reasons. But, if any other aliens are able to pick up this broadcast, you really should consider lending a helping hand to stopping the Cons once and for all. I think we've seen this go on far too long!"

<Earth> Sid Tarif says, "If you ask me they're just wimps. Satisfied to stay out of the war so long as the Decepticons don't threaten them directly."

<Earth> Velum says, "I wouldn't say that. I'd say they're smart. but if they wanted to be smarter, they'd at least offer support before the Cons land on their planet out of the blue too."

<Earth> Sid Tarif says, "The Cons'll come for them eventually, just like they did to your planet. No way is it smart to just wait around for that."

<Earth> Velum says, "Mm, true enough."

<Earth> Ryan Claremont says, "And that's all the time we have. You've been listening to Ryan in the Afternoon. A big thank you to our guests, and not just Velum, who could actually stay with us, but also Ford Bennett, Blades the Protectobot, and of course, all of our callers and listeners. If you like what you heard, don't forget to tip our nom jar. Next up, we have the Hean Sannity Show. And we're signing off, 'Till all are One."