Dork Awakening

IHQ Med Bay

The new Med Bay is large enough to house all the wounded that could result from battles against the Autobots. Near the entrance, there are a series of benches for patients awaiting treatment. Advanced medtables line the sides of the room in symetrical rows while surgery is located within the central area. In the ceiling are several crane mechanisms to assist medics in moving larger Decepticons, each one highly articulated and built to withstand the strain of lifting even Devastator. The room's floor, walls, and ceiling are fitted with forceshield generators to contain those that are too injured to return to duty, possible contaminants, and also are set to automatically engage to protect the room from combat damage. The room is immaculately clean, carries a glossy shine, and always smells of disinfectants, giving off the air of a proper medical bay. To the rear are the airlock doors that lead to the Laboratory.

Hook walks into IHQ Medical ward and turns off his beeper. Ahh the joys of being the on call medic this week. "Allright who paged me in the middle of my work on a PWMD?"

The medical bay is quiet, as most Decepticon casualties are taken care of on Earth, the Decepticon's primary battlefield. Here in IHQ, though, the speedster known as Redshift is present, sitting on a table and idly buffing the already perfect polish on his rifle. He looks up as Hook enters, smirking as though the Constructicon's arrival amuses him.

"Glad you could join us, Hook, you will serve my plans perfectly."

Backfire is in the IHQ Med Bay, currently laid out on a table. His inert form is foreign to anyone who's ever seen the Seeker before, all of his armor has been completely stripped off ... revealing a simple white and gray husk underneath with circuits and wires running rampant. His usually bright optics full of zeal are a dull off-white, completely devoid of conciousness.

Hook squints his optics behind his orange visor "Serve your plans...Why does that phrase does not inspire me right away. That's the sort of thing I tend to hear before getting in trouble. What part of your 'plans' require an artist of my caliber?"

Redshift hops down from the table, aproaching Hook with a grin... An almost predatory grin. "My plan requires /no less/ than the most skilled technician on all of Cybertron, which is why I have contacted yourself, Hook. Only your UNRIVALLED skills is sufficient to bring my vision to reality!" He proclaims, and with a grand flourish, he gestures towards Backfire's battered and broken remains. "Here lies Backfire, a pitiful wreck of a Decepticon, poor in both skills of the mind and the body. you will rebuild him, and in doing so, implement some of MY amazing specifications into this worthless Seeker's frame, so that he might respect instead of ridicule!"

More or less, the Seeker in question is more ridicule than respectful. Backfire remains laid out though, not hopping up off the table like a Seeker-zombie. That would just be bad comedy.

Hook stays silent a bit and glances from Backfire to Redshift and back to Backfire and to Redshift again. "Sounds like a challenge worthy of my skills...For the physical part anyway. The mind is...a whole other playfield." The Constructicon begins prepping the usual tools from the cabinets which are TOTALLY different than the ones Scrapper uses. When Scrapper uses a machete, Hook uses a scalpel. When Scrapper uses a bonesaw, Hook uses a fine tooth circular saw and well you get the picture. One is less painful than the other. "And what are your...specifications?" he asks pulling up Backfire's blueprints on his PDA.

"You will implement MY reflex and agility curcuit designs into this lackluster, factory-default Seeker." Redshift replies. "This useless excuse for a Decepticon has proven he is incapable of learning, so I will not waste my time any further with teaching him. Instead I will have him FORGED ANEW."

"Whether he likes it or not."

If Backfire was concious, would he abject to Redshift's claims? Probably not, considering his recent shortcomings ... then again, he'd probably wonder when he ever did /anything/ right in his entire existence. But as they say, ignorance is bliss.

Hook nods and begins furiously working on his PDA calling up Redshift's blueprints and do a copy/paste and replace of his motor reflex circuitry design onto Backfire's design. "mmmmm It will not be quite as fast as you but close enough. You were built this way if I recall? His chassis is not balanced weight-wise for this type of movement. There is only so much we can do with a seeker design. Still it WILL be quite an improvement over his current capacities." The Constructicon gets to work with his scalpel cutting away all the damaged plates, and removing those that can be removed in order to access Backfire's internal. In a matter of minutes (roughly as fast as humans can chop a car in a chop shop) Backfire is laying 'naked' on the table. Hook plugs in some monitors and life support systems since he will need to unplug a few critical components during the procedure. The life support are enough to bring the seeker back to consciousness but ALL his motor functions are disconnected save the vocalizer.

Combat: Hook runs a diagnostic check on Backfire

Backfire's mind slowly stirs back into conciousness, plucked delicately away from the depths of his dreams ... which contained a pony alt-moded Decepticon leader named 'Sprinklatron'. But you know the saying, don't ask ... don't tell. The Seeker attempts to sit up from his position, but his motor functions are not responding. Backfire coughs once or twice, "What is happening? I can't move ... or see ... am I before the maker?"

Redshift scoffs loudly at Backfire's question, yet more proof of the Seeker's inability to think with any sign of rationality. "No, you moron!" He exclaims, hoping Hook has hooked up Backfire's audial sensors. "You're in the medical bay, idiot."

Scrapper tromps into the medical ward, that fell domain of those who actually make tuff instead of just breaking stuff. His head feels a bit... fuzzy. He's been feeling a bit off since Monday, in fact, but he isn't about to 'fess up yet. Scrapper /knows/ the bedside manners of the folks here, and that ain't what he wants, thanks. He pauses to study what's going on and comments, "Heh. Better him than me," and he fills up his energon mug from the dispensor.

Hook smirks "Do not worry Backfire you are in good hands. Lucky for you all your pain receptors are turned off. I just hate working on someone who keeps wailing like a sissy-bot." Hook disconnects the module which controls the various servos and throws it in the trash bin. Then he proceeds to remove the 4 main servos ergo removing Backfire's arms and legs from the body. "As for the blind part...I suppose I could always turn them back on so you can watch with the mirror." Hook adjusts the mirror on the telescopic arm of the table and uses his sonic screwdriver to reactivate Backfire's optics who's first sight will be his naked armless and legless body.

"Who is here with me ... SpaceCommander? What is the meaning of this, I demand answers!" Backfire yelps as loudly as possible, laying on the table. "I am /not/ a sissy-bot constructi-what'syername..AHGAH!" he screams like a ... sissy-bot as the bright lights shine on his newly activated optics. "Are you sure this isn't the afterworld, how do I know you aren't all ghosts ... or zombies?"

"Yeah, fine." Redshift says, tossing up his hands in exasperation. "We're ghosts and we're stealing your limbs so we can recycle them into kazoos. Happy?"

Scrapper corrects, absently, "No, no, no, we'll make /trumpets/ out of them. Honestly, people!"

Hook begins working on main reflex module putting it in place of the old one. "mmmmm This kind of cable will not support this type of output or abuse very long it will need to be changed as well." Hook disconnects all the wires and cables that connect the servos to the main module and throws them in the trash. He returns with some brand new bigger gauge wires and begins to lay them out through Backfire's body. "I will take a bit more time I am afraid. This is a rather complex operation. Once I am done with the cables, I need to replace the servos, re-attach the limbs, replace the armor plating and you should be good to go after that."

"What have you done with my glorious arms and legs ... I knew it, you ARE zombies!" Backfire cackles, still trying to get up from the table and run off from this crazed adventure ... without legs none-the-less.

Scrapper's optical band flickers a bit over the rundown that Hook just gave. Against his better judgement, he offers, "Uh, Hook? You want a hand with that? Not that I'm doing your ability to get the job done or anything," because he really isn't, "I'm just saying, a spare pair of hands might be useful." He sigh and shakes his head, and he opines, "My zombies were MUCH better behaved than that. Redshift, what are you doing?"

Redshift just shakes his head and sighs, as Backfire continues his zombie-related tirade. "You see what I have to put up with?" He exasperates to the pair of Constructicons. "This moron has got a few screws loose, and a terminal case of the idiocy. I am bypassing the usual routes of training and instruction in favour of a more... /Direct/ route of improvement."

Hook looks up at Scrapper "Oh sure. See that box over there? Check inside you should have a pair of new servos in them. Put those in the place of the old ones currently attached to the legs, I will swap out the arms." he says before finishing up the wiring and getting to work on the new shoulder servos.

Growing furious that he's being ignored by the two technicians, Backfire tries to crane his head to the side to direct a tirade at Hook ... but relents to his current predicament, finally. "SpaceCommander, I know that I am well below your standards ... but did we succeed in our mission?"

Scrapper knows all about legs! He turns into a giant leg, after all. He stomps on over to the crate, ably grabs it with a hand, and balances it on his shoulder before walking back. He sets it down on a tray and rummages through the contents of the crate, turning the servos over in his hands to examine them. He observes to Redshift, "A'ight. So you're souping up his body, but what are you doing about that underclocking issue?"

"Succeed? Against Rodimus Prime?" Redshift throws up his hands again. "It was pure folly for Onslaught to send us against Rodimus, but in spite of that I had hoped you would LEARN something in a real combat scenario, where you failed to do so during simulations. Instead, you blew yourself up, glued you feet to the ground, and nearly got decapitated by Rodimus Prime. So. You tell me."

"But... I did shoot him once SpaceCommander. Does this count for nothing?" Backfire asks quizically, glancing in the mirror to view the modifications. "And you still haven't answered me, what is the meaning of this! Am I being dismantled into Terrocon chow?"

Hook swaps out the old servors flinging them in the 'seeker bin' and installs the new ones. Then proceeds to re-assemble the arm's components and re-attach them to the body. He thinks about giving his warnings to Backfire about his new condition but lets the Space Commander finish up first. Would not want to confuse the poor seeker by discussing two subjects at the same time.

Scrapper works on the legs, putting in the news servos as Hook directed. Scrapper's work isn't as detailed and accurate as Hook's work, but no one's work is like Hook's. He tsks as Redshift dodges the question of Backfire's evident overclocking issue. Warriors. All about the body, never about the brains.

Hook finishes up with the arms and brings back a cart full of new armor plates. If Hook was not a jerk he would say Hey Scrapper nice work on those legs but simply gives an near imperceptible nod. If Scrapper knew the real respect Hook has for his brother's work his own status would be diminished. "All we need is put the armor plates back together save for the chest plate. I do not want him squirming or trashing about while I work. I will only restore his motor functions when we are done."

Combat: Hook expertly repairs Backfire's injuries.

Combat: Hook is able to repair some of Backfire's internal systems damage.

"Squirm? Any honorable Decepticon Seeker would /never/ squirm Hook!" Backfire mutters, intently glaring at the new pieces of armor being brought out for his repair. "Wait, what is going on here ... why does no one address my concerns!"

"For NOW, Backfire, you are being spared the shame of being ground up into food for the Terrorcons. This is mainly because we currently have no Terrorcons on hand." Redshift replies wryly. "And Scrapper... There is nothing I can do to stop Backfire from being such a brain-dead moron. If YOU would like to try, you're welcome to it."

The Seeker actually sniffles a bit when Redshift mentions the words 'brain-dead moron', obviously hitting a soft spot on this warrior. "Was it neccesary to remove all of my armor-plating SpaceCommander, I don't recollect being damaged that much?"

Scrapper offers, perhaps not helpfully, "I could make HIM into a zombie, it might help. Who knows? Would it be worse?" He takes Hook's nod as tacit approval that the servo job is not utterly repugnant, so he closes up the legs.

Hook finishes reaplcing the armor including the head assembly for a new old-school seeker head. The Constructicon takes a pause to admire his work...Then inserts his hand into the seeker's chest and begins re-activating a few systems. "It will take a minute or so for your processors to complete the reboot sequence. You will feel..weird at first. You will have a 48 hour adjustment period during which I would avoid live-combat if possible. Run plenty of diagnostics and re-calibration routine so the rest of your systems can adjust to your new motor reflexes. Also stop by the training room to re-calibrate your target tracking software so the reticule can keep up with your arms. I think that covers it all."

Rise...Backfire

Harrow had quietly scooted in a while ago, simply to take notes. And try not to heckle. She's off to the side hefting a large datapad with the stylus at the ready. There's a simplified image of a Seeker with notes scrawled to the margin.

"Yes yes, I am fully aware of the precautions after a repair Hook." Backfire laughs, this is obviously not his first time knocked out of action in the field of battle. Swinging up from his laid down position much faster than normal, the simpleton stumbles forward but manages to catch himself mid-step. Optics blinking, he gives Redshift a puzzling glance ... not quite sure just what the heck his mentor ordered done. Attempting to move his arm up to itch his helm, the Seeker accidentally thwaks himself ... which produces a hollow sound. "Owwwwie!"

Redshift watches Backfire intently as the Seeker rises from the repair table, his red optics darting quickly to follow the Seeker's newfound reflexes. He turns to regard Hook and Scrapper, smirking to his own private joke. "you have outdone yourselves, Constructicons. Another job well done." He says, while still looking at Backfire. "Backfire! you will report to the training room and complete your standard training routines, and you will CONTINUE to run those routines until I say otherwise."

Backfire whirls around faster than he expected, facing Redshift. "At once SpaceCommander!" he states, still bearing some resentment for the remarks earlier. Out of the corner of an optic, he catches a glimpse of a 'flattop' Seeker staring back at him. "Who is this ugly cur?" Backfire mutters, sauntering up to the full length mirror. "And why does he mimick me, does he wish to feel the wrath of BACKFIRE!"

Harrow fails to stifle a snicker. "They replaced your ugly mug," she points out, scribbling down another note.

Hook facepalm at Backfire's deductive power. "Elementary my dear Scrapper...This one is a lost cause. Thank you for your praise Redshift but I am happily turning him over to you." Hook puts away the tools and cleans up the place a bit.

"My 'ugly mug'?" Backfire questions, turning to face Harrow ... whom he didn't even notice was standing there. He hopes she wasn't in the room before his armor plating was reinstalled, that'd be embarrassing! "The horror! I'm ... ugly now!"

Redshift is beginning to have second thoughts about not telling Hook to just implant a large explosive inside Backfire's cranium. "Hmm, I don't recall requesting your facial structure be modified... But I guess that's what you get for having a stock body with a custom face."

Scrapper sips from his own mug, which is just a mug, and he shrugs to Hook. "You gotta have hope. So that you can put it in a box with a bunch of terrible things and trick people." he gestures.

Harrow holds up the stylus and uses it to measure something. "It's much better now," she adds. "An improvement."

Backfire turns to look at the mirror once more, looking at each and every inane aspect of his alterations. "Hook, Scrapper ... I thank you for your duty to the EMPIRE!" he gestures to the Constructicons, bowing low. Backfire glares at his reflection, such a vile appearance. "This is an outrage. You sicken me!" he mutters to his doppelganger, throwing a fist out at the mirror ... shattering it into pieces on the ground. Smiling, the Seeker looks down and suddenly realizes there are now twenty to thirty ugly faces staring back at him. "Awwww, this is a travesty!" Backfire sinks to his knees, quietly sobbing at the multitude of foreign faces mocking him.

Scrapper looks at the broken mirror and then over at Backfire, and he asks, "You haven't been hanging out with Vektor, have you?"

Backfire whimpers, "No." to Scrapper while he cradles his head in his hands.

Redshift turns his back on Backfire and marches out of the repair bay. "Stop your moaning, Backfire, you demean us /all/ with your behavior. Radio me when you are ready to be a /true/ warrior."