State of Autobot Public Relations...

Uptown San Francisco

This part of San Francisco is one of the few areas left mostly untouched by the weather of the last decade. The steep, curving roads are still lined with beautiful old houses, some of them almost a century old. Flower pots grace the roadsides and are cultivated meticulously. Some of the streets even show the old brick roads underneath. Occasionally, you see one of the famous cable cars pass you down the streets, and people hop on and off of them at random. Fisherman's Wharf is visible in the distance, and people will give you directions to Lombard Street if you ask. The scent of the flowers mingles with the smell of fresh-baked sourdough and the slight fish scent from the Wharf. A weathered old man passes you with a fruit cart. It's covered with fresh strawberries, oranges, bananas, and other tasty items.

The Autobots have been on Earth for years. Decades, even.

And, as a result, they occasionally pitch in for the occasional public relations event. In fact, it's come to the point where it's nearly routine, where almost every Autobot takes his turn in presenting the Autobrand to the public.

Though today, it seems that someone wasn't paying attention to the duty roster.

"Uuuuh." Grimlock says, staring down at the crowd of schoolchildren massed around in the school's parking lot. "Hi?"

Bell UH-1V Iroquois  transforms into his Blades mode.

Repugnus managed to get here because another, kid-friendlier Autobot was supposed to show up, and was mysteriously ordered away at the last moment for some other task. By Repugnus. Who's standing in front of the kids right now, grinning at them like he wants to eat them.

Blades whispers to Grimlock, "So the last time I did one of these events, the Decepticons attacked NASA. Just... fair disclosure."

Apparently, Grimlock has been assigned some public relations gig. Who seriously thought of that?? At any rate, Blurr's been assigned to making sure Grimlock doesn't step on one of the children. He's not quite sure why he hadn't just been replaced by someone a lot more well-suited for this. Like Tailgate.

He sighs, grumbling slightly. "Hey watch it Grimlock, your foot is dangerously close to that light-haired juvenile." He says, pointing at a blonde-haired girl who has ventured dangerously slow to Grimlock's feet.

As with the other Autobots, Specter was somehow chosen to represent the faction at the charitable event. Though why someone would pick an eccentric recluse loner, is anyone's guess. None the less, the pristine white Autobot is here among the others.. polishing one of his blades, looking to the others as to their purpose here.

Grimlock pauses for a moment, and looks over at Blurr. "Wait, what you say? You Blurr talk too fast!" He pauses for a moment as Blades mutters something to him- the protectobot is offered a helpless shrug, and then Grimlock peers down at the childrens. "DOn't worry, tiny humans! Me Grimlock no gonna smash you!" he says!

"But, uh. Don't go too close to that guy." Grimlock points at Repugnus. "Him am weirdo."

Meanwhile, some brave, red-haired little boy raises his hand: "Hey! You guys turn into stuff, right? What do you turn into? Turn into something cool!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Speak of the devil, and he appears. Tailgate has heard about some kind of PR event the Autobots are putting on for the humans, and he's curious. He's actually kind of upset that he he didn't get invited, but he's on patrol at moment nearby to the area and it sounds like it's worth checking out. Consequently, he drives over to the little shindig to find Repugnus, Blurr, Grimlock and that shady mech Specter representing. Transforming, he looks around and spots the human children. "Wow...!" he exclaims quietly. "I've never seen humans in the early stages of life!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Blurr groans. "I said, watch your f--" But then the kid takes a cue and returns to the group a safe distance away from the giant dino's feet. Eh, not like Grimlock's going to pay attention, anyway. "Never mind." For the record, he doesn't talk too fast! Grimlock just hears too slowly!

<p class="MsoNormal">The speedster turns toward Tailgate as he arrives. Not many would refer to the minibot as a devil, though. He turns back to Grimlock. "So, uh...what were we supposed to be doing, here?"

<p class="MsoNormal">Oh boy, Specter is polishing one of his blades? Blades is interested in that! he starts to wander over to go hover over Specter's shoulder like a vast predatory bird to watch what Specter is doing. However, Blades /has/ done events like this before, so when one of the children demands that they turn into something cool, Blades sighs and transforms on command. Yes, helicopters sure are sweet.

<p class="MsoNormal">Blades transforms into his Bell UH-1V Iroquois <Blades> mode.

<p class="MsoNormal">Repugnus glances between Grimlock and Blurr, grinning madly. "Heehee, it's okay, kids! I'm keenly aware of exactly where you are... at ALL times." He winks at his own little joke. And it's true, too! Especially now that he has the children's scents. But the question from the ginger catches his attention. "Oh, my! Well, I would transform, but... it's against regulations!" That's actually true, too. It's against regulations for Repugnus to transform in the presence of children except in cases where it is necessary to protect human or Autobot life and property.

<p class="MsoNormal">"Oh wow!" Red-headed tiny-human exclaims. "Helcicopters are cool!"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Me Grimlock cool too! Look!" and Grimlock himself transforms! Now, instead of a giant stompy robot, there's a giant stompy robot dinosaur. This earns another cheer from the gathered schoolchildren.

<p class="MsoNormal">Though at this point, a harried-looking teacher ushers the child to the back of the gathering, and clears her throat. "Anyway!" she says, "Uh, so, Mr. Autobot. Autobots." She glances around at the...odd gathering of robots. "Do you have any advice for our students, on how they can be successful?" She winds up directing the question mostly at Tailgate, 'cause he looks the least murdery.

<p class="MsoNormal">With a grunt and a growl, Grimlock changes into a robot T-rex! Watch out.

<p class="MsoNormal">Noting Blades interest and Furmanism, Specter doesn't outwardly show it by running the special carbon-fiber rag along the blade's edge. He's never really attended one of these events, in truth.. he hasn't really had much of any interaction with humans outside of Andi Lassiter.

<p class="MsoNormal">One child approaches, his big blue eyes afixed upon the blade in Specter's hand. "So uhh.. what do you do with that?"

<p class="MsoNormal">Somewhat startled by the child's voice, Specter's optics glow a bright blue before returning to their usual cyan. "Well, you see.. many prefer the blaster. Firing at a distance, less chance of damage to self during attack." he replies, folding the rag into subspace. "Me? I prefer a more -direct- approach." Specter muses, thrusting the blade forward. "Much more.." he trails, giving a thousand mile stare. "Personal."

<p class="MsoNormal">When Repugnus speaks up, a cruel grin lighting up his features, Tailgate's innermost energon churns unpleasantly in his chassis. /Why is he here?!/ he thinks. /Dealing with young humans is clearly not a job for this guy/. He just tries not to look at him. When it appears that the teacher is addressing him, his disposition improves. "Advice? He looks down at the schoolchildren and crouches so that he's on their level (not that he has to bend that low, he's a minibot after all). "Well, I would say... Don't be afraid to do the right thing. Even it hurts you and maybe some of your friends emotionally, do it anyway. You won't regret it in the long run, and it will be for the better of everyone in the future." He pauses. "Don't make snap judgements or assume anything about anyone. Just because they don't seem like the friendly type, you could be wrong." He eyes Specter, then turns back to the kids. "Alright, well, I hope I gave you some good advice about, er, life," he says, optics bright.

<p class="MsoNormal">Bell UH-1V Iroquois <Blades> is asked to offer advice on how to be successful. Oh dear. The Protectobot tenders brightly, "Always keep your knives sharpened! Dull knives are actually more dangerous to their owners, because you'll shove too hard and then maybe overdo it and then you end up cutting yourself and going to the emergeny room." True facts, but kind of weird advice to give to children. "...or just merge with a doctor. You're pretty much set for life after that."

<p class="MsoNormal">Repugnus wasn't asked, but speaks up anyway. "To be successful in life, you have to be ready to destroy anyone who threatens you. Life is tough, kids, and you'll have enemies everywhere. But you can beat them. Watch them. Follow them. Record everything in video. And when they cross you? Use what you learned to DESTROY them." He smiles.

<p class="MsoNormal">Robot T-Rex! <Grimlock> pauses in his posing for a moment, to realize other robots are talking. Or, really, Repugnus is talking, which is never a good thing. "Uh." Grimlock offers, having the faintest, vaguest inkling that something bad might be happening at the moment. "...why you Repugnus here again?"

<p class="MsoNormal">

<p class="MsoNormal">Meanwhile, the teacher winces a little, and steps back- but before she can bring up another subject, a little girl pipes asks Tailgate (since he's the friendly one!) "How do you know what the right thing is?"

<p class="MsoNormal">B lurr watches Grimlock transform, making sure his tail doesn't accidentally whack one of the kids. Fortunately Grimlock is actually careful enough. When Tailgate tells the kids never to assume anything about anyone, and he shakes his head. "ON the contrary, humans...sometimes you /have/ to make assumptions, because you don't know everything, and you can't just wait around for some kind of /proof/. It's just like if you step on a wasp or bee, you can assume it will attack you because it's been threatened."

<p class="MsoNormal">He pauses, thinking for just a brief second before continuing. "Other than that, do everything as fast as you possibly can--you never know how short your life could be. -Especially- you organics."

<p class="MsoNormal"><RP-Coordination> Talia McKinley says, "Yeah, I've been through some pretty shitty RPs."

<p class="MsoNormal">The child stands in disbelief, as the blade is thrust and rescinded, his eyes wide and mouth agape. With his bottom lip aquiver, the kid lets out a might shrill. "THAT'S AWESOME!!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Before he knows it, Specter is surrounded by a small group of children begging for a live performance.

<p class="MsoNormal">"Please Mr. Bino, show us how to dice things!"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Like that dinosaur over there, make stabby at his faces!!"

<p class="MsoNormal">"CUT ALL THE THINGS!!!"

<p class="MsoNormal">When Tailgate hears Repugnus' and Blurr's advice, he cringes. "E-eh.." he mutters. Then he leans forward, so that the girl can hear him better. "Well, it's hard to know sometimes. But usually, you'll just know it, in here," Tailgate taps his chassis. "When you see someone getting unfairly hurt, or being beaten down for no reason at all--well, then you'll know the right thing to do will be to stand up for them, even if your friends don't like you doing that." He arches his brow ridges at the little girl.

<p class="MsoNormal">Repugnus smirks at Grimlock. "I invited myself, as usual. But enough about me!" He grins evilly at the kids. "You wanna know if you're doing the right thing, kiddies? Well, after you've done it, you'll know--if you laugh about it afterwards! Like if Specter stabbed ol' Grimmy, I know *I'd* get a chuckle or two out of that, if I was him!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Bell UH-1V Iroquois <Blades> answers the question about right, even though it isn't directed at him, "Knowing what is right is tough! When you're built... er, well, young, I guess," yes, humans do the young thing, "the people around you will just tell you what they think is right, and you'll probably believe them. But here's the awful thing: sometimes, they're wrong. You look back a few years later, and you realise that you were a terrible person, because you never stopped to think about what you were doing! Because you believed other people and trusted them to steer you the right way, because you didn't know any better. And you'll do things, too, because they're popular. because they're easy. And you just won't think. And pretty soon, you can find yourself in a really bad place!"

<p class="MsoNormal">

<p class="MsoNormal">"So whatever you're doing, stop and think. Take responsibility for your beliefs and actions. Are you just doing this because someone else told you to? Because it's popular? Because it's easy? or can you justify /why/ you do these things? And are you willing to live with the consequences of your actions and take responsibility for them? because what's right can be tough, and it's not always clear cut. Doing the right thing may lose your friends. It may make you unpopular."

<p class="MsoNormal">"But what it all really comes down to is this: are you exploiting someone weak because you can and because they can't stop you? Because if you are, you had better stop and think about what you're doing and why."

<p class="MsoNormal">He transforms and casts a baleful glance at the audience.

<p class="MsoNormal">Bell UH-1V Iroquois <Blades> transforms into his Blades mode.

<p class="MsoNormal">Adding to their conversation, and ducking the requests to make mince meat out of a superior officer, Specter replies monotonely. "To be fair, there is no such thing as right or wrong.. when given proper perspective. As in nature, it is not inherently wrong for a predator to devour its prey.. it is a cycle, like all things in life."

<p class="MsoNormal">Meeting more blank stares, he continues. "You see, morality is objective.. what is true for you can be not true for another. The pendulum of the conscience swings between sense and nonsense, not 'right' and 'wrong'." he accentuates the last two by air quotation marks.

<p class="MsoNormal">"Perhaps someone else could further elaborate?" Specter looks to the other Autobots.

<p class="MsoNormal">Robot T-Rex! <Grimlock> looks around at the gathering- and, as Blades speaks up, the dinobot scratches his head. "Hey, wait. Me Grimlock stronger than EVERYBODY. But me no take 'vantages, right? Me Grimlock am GOOD GUY." he nods at this- and, perhaps out of habit, he glares over at Repugnus to make sure the monsterbot hasn't done anything horrible.

<p class="MsoNormal">Meanwhile, Spectre's sage words go mostly ignored by the crowd of second graders. "Hey! Sword guy! Do something cool!" a child yells. "Turn into a sword and chop something up!"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Yeah!" a second one chimes in. "Chop up the school! Yaaaay!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Blurr just shrugs as Specter as he looks to the others for further clarification. "You do what you can to preserve as many sapients as posssible." he says, shooting Repugnus a look. He would glare, but the Monsterbot is a superior officer. "Sometimes that means killing dangerous people, or doing terrible things to them. But part of being strong is being able to make difficult decisions like that. Choosing one life over another, or a hundred lives over ten when no better altnerative existed and not coming down on yourself for it."

<p class="MsoNormal">Shrugging, Specter looks towards Blades and Grimlock. "Should we make a demonstration of this 'school' they speak of?" he inquires, holstering his blade in his side sheath and crossing his arms.

<p class="MsoNormal">

<p class="MsoNormal">"To answer your other inquiry, I do -not- transform into a sword. That would be.." he pauses, never having examine the question before. "Well, that would most likely prove beneficial in some instances.. but no, I do not."

<p class="MsoNormal">Tailgate cringes. "Now, uh, that would be an example of how you know something is /wrong/. There's no good reason to chop up the school, or to stab Grimlock over here who hasn't hurt or attacked anyone. Violence should always be your last resort. If no one has to get hurt, then why bother?" he says, shrugging and holding his hand servos up. "Remember kids, there's /always/ a choice, even if it seems like there's only one thing to do. You can choose to do whatever you want, and if you choose right, you won't regret it. Every life and individual matters. Even the machines in your own home who serve you willingly! Er, sometimes. You have to remember them, and make sure they're being treated equally and fairly too because they're intelligent creatures too!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Blurr facepalms when Tailgate mentions that the human-created machines were intelligent, sighing.

<p class="MsoNormal">Robot T-Rex! <Grimlock> looks from Spectre, to the school. Spectre. School. Spectre. School. Gears turn in his head. "Uuuuh. It probably be bad if us sword up school." He admits. It's a bad sign when Grimlock's being the responsible one.

<p class="MsoNormal">Meanwhile, the children aren't content. "Hey! Sword guy! If you don't turn into a sword, what DO you turn into? It better be something cool, like that guy!" He points at Grimlock, "And even THAT guy turned into a Helicopter, which was cool, and he talked about knives and stuff just like you did, so what does THAT mean, huh?"

<p class="MsoNormal">Somewhere at the back of the crowd, a harried vice principal scribbles down notes, such as: NEVER INVITE AUTOBOTS EVER AGAIN.

<p class="MsoNormal">Repugnus has too many eyes on him to do something really bad. Unfortunately for him. "To go with Specter's little speech, you know, nature, and stuff. You got your prey, right? You, basically, and most Autobots. Then you got your predators, and that would be the Decepticons. Well, there's another category above that. Superpredators. Like me! We eat predators, because we can and because it's tasty. So, I guess my point is--don't worry about good and evil, worry about being at the top of the food chain."

<p class="MsoNormal">Blades tries to put a hand on Specter's upper arm to hold him back. Blades is pretty good at /pretending/ to be a decent person when he puts in the effort. He hisses, "No! No, we do not chop the school down. Aside from the fact that Hot Spot would /skin me/..." ...there are way too many witnesses right now. "...see, this is peer pressure, like I was talking about."

<p class="MsoNormal">"Psh, -probably-??" Blurr makes an exasperated sound. "I'm pretty sure that would be a downright -terrible- idea. It wouldn't be right because it would be destroying someone else's property, and that's a crime. It's called vandalism." he explains. But then Repugnus is calling the Autobots prey to the Decepticons. Okay, superior officer or not, that is just ridiculous. He stares appalled at Repugnus. Has he gone binary?! "Excusemedidyoujustinsinuatethatwe'reinferiortotheDecepticons?Infrontofthe/humans/?!" Sure, he spouted off that kind of scrap all the time in combat and back at base, but here?! Seriously? "Ohandyou'resuperiortoeveryone sowhydon'tyoujust goandbeafactionuntoyourselfhuh?! Seehowfar/that/wouldgetyou!"

<p class="MsoNormal">"...Sir."

<p class="MsoNormal">"Oh, right." Specter nods to Blades, still unsure just what a school is for. "So you're saying we chop up this school when no one is looking?"

<p class="MsoNormal">When the kids pester him about his altmode, he obliges by folding down into a plain old hover car. Just as the vehicle is about to touch down on the ground, the hover engines kick up and a rollick of dust follows in its wake.

<p class="MsoNormal">This might have been impressive in the 80s, but let's face it.. they've probably all got McFly hoverboards by now.

<p class="MsoNormal">With his head lowering down into the torso, Specter's limbs fold up into the base.. recogfiguring into a Cybertronian Hover-Car!

<p class="MsoNormal">Repugnus chuckles at Blurr. "Yes, I'm saying that the Autobots are inferior to the Decepticons. But it's okay, children, because we have the edge on them in terms of numbers. Unicron helped with that a lot, some time back. But anyway, yes, I have considered just striking it out on my own since I know what I'm doing, buuuut, well, I'm just waiting for Rodimus to think of a reason to kick me out of the bots again. I'm sure I'll give him one soon enough!"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Oh man! I think my mom drives one of those!" Is some human-larvae's response to Spectre's altmode.

<p class="MsoNormal">Meanwhile, Grimlock looks over and squints at Blurr, catching maybe every third word. "HEY! That not right! Him Repugnus no better than everybody! It's -ME GRIMLOCK- who am better than everybody!" And Grimlock lets out a mighty roar, and a triumphant burst of fire-breath!

<p class="MsoNormal">Children cheer. Teachers cower.

<p class="MsoNormal">Tailgate is glancing over the crowd of humans when he spots the vice principle desperately scribbling notes down, noting to never invite the Autobots to the school again. His spark sinks and he sighs heavily, letting his shoulder servos sag. When things start looking like they're about to fly off the handle, he deadpans and his optics grow wide. He runs in front of Repugnus while simultaneously trying to ward off Grimlock with a hand servo. "Guys! Please! We're Autobots! No one is better than everyone else! We fight for justice and equality, how can we do that when we don't even know how to treat each /other/ equally and with respect?!" He shouts, breaking free of his usual quiet nature.

<p class="MsoNormal">"Ohyeahwhydoyouhavetowaitforhimtokickyououthuhhuhwhydon'tyoujuustleave!" Blurr is still quite honked off and tempted to punch Repugnus. And now Grimlock is roaring angrily and Tailgate is standing in front of the Monsterbot. He can't believe Repugnus is saying this about the Autobots.

<p class="MsoNormal">It's really taking everything he can muster to not shove past Tailgate and swing at Repugnus. Which is not a good thing, thus he determines it's best to get out of here before things escalate too much. "Hmph!WhateverI'moutofhere!" And with that, he transforms into a hovercar that is -much- cooler than Specter's altmode before taking off at supersonic speeds.

<p class="MsoNormal">The windows of the school explode into a million pieces and shatter, falling out of their frames.

<p class="MsoNormal">"That was SO COOL!" A random child exclaims. Many more follow suit.

<p class="MsoNormal">In a flurry of moving parts, Blurr folds down into a pale blue-colored supersonic hovercar.

<p class="MsoNormal">Blades covers his face with a hand, paces over to one of the teachers, and he offers, "...uhm, look, I have this form here," and he holds out a form, "where you can expense the repairs to, uh, Hot Spot's expense account, so get yourselves some nice insulated windows as replacements. I'm sorry about Blurr being... an abomination of the laws of physics."

<p class="MsoNormal">Repugnus just laughs and laughs at Blurr's outburst and subsequent (accidental) destruction of the school's windows. Even Grimlock is spraying fire about dangerously just to prove he's the best. Yesss, yessss! He's ruining the whole thing, and all he has to do is open his mouth. Speaking of that, as Tailgate stands in front of him, Repugnus stoops down from behind to give him a hug from behind. "Oh, okay. I'll treat you with respect, Tailgate. But only you. Awww."

<p class="MsoNormal">Repugnus just laughs and laughs at Blurr's outburst and subsequent (accidental) destruction of the school's windows. Even Grimlock is spraying fire about dangerously just to prove he's the best. Yesss, yessss! He's ruining the whole thing, and all he has to do is open his mouth. Speaking of that, as Tailgate stands in front of him, Repugnus stoops down from behind to give him a hug. "Oh, okay. I'll treat you with respect, Tailgate. But only you. Awww."

<p class="MsoNormal">Tailgate twitches. He doesn't like being hugged by Repugnus. He knew it wasn't sincere. And even if it was, Tailgate is certainly convinced it's not. /Please don't hug me ever again/, he thinks to himself, but he's well practiced enough in the area of restraint (unlike /some/) that he doesn't say it aloud to Repugnus. He just stands there, arm servos hanging down at his side, looking uncomfortable. "Thank you," he says quietly, hoping he'll let go now.

<p class="MsoNormal">"No hugging!" Grimlock points an accusatory claw at Repugnus. He glances briefly at Blurr's super-speedy retreat, but then back to the Autobots. "Me Grimlock say it weird when you Repugnus do...uh, just 'bout anything! Me Grimlock say, transform and roll out!"

<p class="MsoNormal">And, with that, since he's already transformed, Grimlock starts lumbering off away from the presentation. Hopefully, those with wheeled or flying modes may follow suit. It's...not exactly the best of retreats, but at least Grim knows when to cut his losses!

<p class="MsoNormal">Repugnus's alt mode is slower than his robot mode, so he just looks about, shrugs, and walks off.

<p class="MsoNormal">But not before giving Tailgate a wink. Shudder.

<p class="MsoNormal">Tailgate sighs, glad the two trouble makers are leaving. Turning to the humans, he crouches down once more, to address them, "I'm sorry. That didn't really go as planned.." although the little even was probably far from planned. "I hope you don't think poorly of us. Those of us that came are .. only a few and don't represent all of us accurately. I enjoyed talking to you guys, at least." He puts on a happy face for the humans and salutes. "Until we meet again!" he says, and he transforms and drives back to the base.

<p class="MsoNormal">Tailgate transforms into a Sports Car!

<p class="MsoNormal">Transforming, Specter realizes half the other Autobots have already left. Looking right, then left.. he brandishes another blade. "So, now that these 'witnesses' are gone.. howabout we cut up that school you were speaking of?"

<p class="MsoNormal">The Cybertronian Hover-Car teeters back, the rear seperating into two legs.. revealing the albino Autobot Specter!