An Inspector Calls

Summary: As everyone is running about being wacky humans, Autobot City gets a visitor - a very strange UN inspector, with some unusual demands...

'''Lounge/Observation Room

''Converted from an unused medical observation room, the lounge still offers a view of the Repair Bay through a one-way plexisteel mirror that encompasses almost half of the east wall. Sound, too, is transmitted from the Repair Bay, allowing the friends of the injured to see and hear what's going on without distracting the medics from their delicate work. More than that, it's also a place to rest and relax, furnished with comfortable chairs, various video feeds of both Terran and Cybertronian style entertainment, and an automated bar dispensing energon for those who want to relax with some refreshments.

In the lounge is sitting Inspector Goole, an inspector from the UN who was booked several days ago to discuss the issues surrounding the aftermath in Russia. He sits tapping his briefcase and slowly sipping from a styrofoam cup

Monstereo makes his way in from Repair Bay where he was just doing rounds. He's helpful that way. The Junk-Doc whistles the theme to M*A*S*H* as he appears. He spies the human. "Oh, 'ello."

Inspector Goole toffs his bowler hat to Monstereo and holds out a hand. "Inspector Goole" he smiles. "From the UN. Can you let your superiors know I've arrived, it is rather dull just sitting about, and your vending machine isn't giving out change..."

Graham Slim-Dhance walks rapidly and somewhat unsteadily up to the Inspector. "Havent' seen you before are you Sunstreaker or Blueshift or Rewind or Eject or Hound or Ultra Magnus or Metroplex or Omega Supreme or Elita One or Arcee or someone else or are you a Decepticon in disguise MONSTEREO there's a DECEPTICON in the LOUNGE and RAINDANCE IS MISSING" Graham waves his arm and the breifcase for emphasis, just before Goole introduces himself. "Oh you're HUMAN okay false alarm apart from Raindance being missing I need to tell her things URGENTLY"

Silverbolt walks his way into the lounge and gets a cup of Energon. "Inspector Goole. Is it inspection time all ready?" he says softly as he drains the cup.

Monstereo offers a finger as he stoops down to shake with the Inspector. He smiles to Graham. "Easy big boy... Paranoia strikes deep, into your life it will creep." He turns to Silverbolt, who has more say in Autobot matters than the Junkion ofcourse.

Inspector Goole blinks at Grand Slam slightly, taken aback. "Ah young man, there is absolutely nothing to worry about, I'm not a 'Blue Supreme' or a 'Sun Magnus' or anything of the sort." He stands up and gives Silverbolt a quick salute, handing the large mech his identity card and hefting his heavy briefcase onto the table in front of him. "We can do this here, if you like. And you - " he gestures to Grand Slam and Monstereo "- you can join in too, if you like. This may be quite important"

"It is okay Inspector I'm not a Blue Magnum or a Sun Screen either" replies Graham Slim-Dhance, tripping over his words. "I am a tank actually but now I am a human and learning about things like ARMS and LEGS and how to make human money using those things and what to put in my human body when and where there are lots of things and sure I will help"

Silverbolt waves the salute away. "I'm just the ranking officer right now. I'm Silverbolt, leader of the Aerialbots. So what's on the agenda, Inspector?" he says scanning the ID card. "No problems."

Monstereo smiles warmly and rises again. "Sure thing. Nothing but reruns on tonight anyway."

Inspector Goole nods at Grand Slam, passing the crazy man a five dollar note. "Yes yes my dear boy. Now can you be a gentleman and walk to the vending machine with your legs and get me a packet of Space Raiders and a cup of coffee with your hands? Keep the change." He looks over to Silverbolt and Monstereo as he flattens his briefcase onto the table and opens it up, revealing a laptop inside. "Well, I know we were due to discuss Russia, but something else has come up I'm afraid. Some very disturbing news"

Monstereo arches a brow. "No presents From Russia With Love?" He looks to the briefcase.

"I'm not your courier Inspector" Graham says, pocketing the five ."Also I don't need your money I have my own but thanks Monstereo I don't know what you're talking about but stop looking at my breifcase it is mine okay get your own" He hugs the case tight against his chest.

Silverbolt tilts his head. 'Disturbing news? What's that?" Yup...feign ignorance so he can get to the point.

Monstereo looks to Graham and frowns slightly. "You're not having a good time are you?"

Graham Slim-Dhance says, "I feel GREAT!"

Inspector Goole clicks his finger at Monstereo and points at Grand Slam. "Ahem. Briefcase please." He then straightens his tie and hat, as if he was about to tell a family of four that he was about to reposess their house. "I am afraid I have some very bad news, for those of you who knew him. Last night, the UN Inspector Gerald Goole was shot and killed when his home was broken into by intruders." He patiently waits for his briefcase back.

Monstereo turns to Goole again. "Uh... are /you/ feeling okay, Inspector Goole?"

Graham Slim-Dhance now has TWO breifcases? "Oh I'm sorry I forgot I was already holding mine and thought this was mine and somehow you had taken it here it is back Inspector I am sorry it is hard to get used to having a face and arms sometimes." He hands the Inspector back his breifcase, then hugs his own metal one to his chest protectively, eyes sliding from side to side to check if anyone is going to sneak up and take it.

Silverbolt winces. "Ouch. I'm sorry to hear that. I only wish the best for the rest of the family and I hope he finds peace whereever he's at, Inspector."

Inspector Goole doffs his hat at Monstereo. "Yes young man, I am, thank you ever so much!" He turns his attention back to the rest of the Autobots. "Yes, I am afraid that once dead, his DNA was harvested and a clone body quickly built with my mind implanted into it so that I could take his place without detection." He calmly taps a few buttons on his laptop. "Now, shall we get down to business?"

Silverbolt nods quietly. "well....as long as he's....you're...ok." he then blinks his optics. "All right. What's first?"

Monstereo stands there like a half-wit still processing this matter. "Clone body... who are you in there then?"

Inspector Goole taps a few more buttons on his laptop, displaying a diagram of the Earth. "We detected a pulse coming from one of our old class Cyan ships last night, warning us that it had been breached. And I'm afraid to say that my superiors are not happy." He flicks his head up, eyes twinkling and extends a hand to Monstereo. "Armatage Sloor, of the fifth Azrealean fleet. Diplomatic service. I'm here to talk about your total and utter surrender and annexation of this world to the grand Archon."

Monstereo calmly smiles to the Goole clone. "Oh reallllllly?"

Silverbolt's friendly smile is immediately snuffed. "Surren......You're joking." He then turns that looks into a very nasty smile. "Diplomatic service huh? and I bet you won't talk about anything but the complete and utter surrender of earth. Right?"

Blaze Renard darts into the lounge, having hurried back to Autobot City upon hearing Monstereo's message. He skids to a stop, wide-eyed and panting slightly. "What's going on?!"

Inspector Goole shakes his head slowly, almost apologetically. "Yes, those are the terms I'm afraid. Sorry chaps." He hits another button, and turns around his laptop to show the screen. "This is our bargaining position" he says, a wry smile on his face. On the screen is the image of dozens of Transformer bodies, the ones that were humanized, such as Jetfire, Raindance and yes, Foxfire, all suspended in what looks to be a swirling, purple void, surrounded by flashed of lightening. "A recording, of course, there is no live data being transmitted. But rest assured that they are quite safe. For the moment."

Monstereo bulb-blinks. He glances to Blaze Renard as he asks Goole, "So... wouldn't Cybertron be the place to demand surrender of?" Monstereo is feeling awfully slow today.

Silverbolt just....stares at the clone.....it doesn't even deserve a name. "So....if we surrender....what then? you'll return their bodies? Or will you just hold them over our heads for all time....saying you'll return them if we act like 'good little slaves'?"

Blaze Renard stares at the image in horror. He turns his gaze to Goole. "You...you son of a...!" He snarls, showing his canines, which almost do look like a pair of fangs right now. "This is all your fault, then?!"

Inspector Goole shrugs. "Not my choice I'm afraid. I could have one or two destroyed if you like, if that would make you feel better about surrendering." He gives a warm, inappropriate smile. "It really wouldn't be any trouble you know." He turns to Monstereo. "Oh no no no, that wouldn't do at all. We don't want Cybertron, that would be a waste. From what little we've learnt, your race will rip it apart long before the Great Work is complete. It is this world we want, and this one we will take, one way or another." To Foxfire, he gives another soft smile. "Me? Oh my boy, if you had just left everything alone and didn't meddle in things that don't concern you, you'd still be you, and I wouldn't /need/ to be here. But as it stands, we can hardly risk a race as advanced as yours knowing of our methods, can we?"

Silverbolt calmly walks forward and.....just casually reaches for the computer....to get a...closer look at the screen.

Monstereo gives the screen a glance. He then keeps his optics on Goole and Renard. Kinda hoping he won't have to come between them.

Inspector Goole gladly pushes the screen forwards, passing the Autobot a data card as well. "I have the tape copied to this electronic media" he smiles. "So you can show the others. I wouldn't want people to disbelieve you"

Blaze Renard folds his arms. "For all we know, this could be a trick. Show us some proof that you really have our bodies."

Silverbolt looks back down at the 'inspector' and checks the screen again. "I supposed you've taken the Inspector's body as well? Or did you just kill him for a cover?"

Inspector Goole sighs and taps the table. "I did already tell you I killed him, for all your intellect, you really are a stupid race." He turns to Foxfire. "Well young man. Perhaps I am tricking you, and have somehow invented this video and this ludicrous claims. And perhaps I somehow know other things that I have said which no-one else should know." He shrugs. "Perhaps I could even kill... this one." He points at the body of the fox-like transformer that floats on the screen. "If I had that one destroyed, would that make you happy?"

Blaze Renard stiffens. "That's...that's MY body! Don't you DARE!"

Monstereo rubs his chin. "Arn't you supposed to let one body go as a matter of good will showing you are good to your word?"

Monstereo says, "That /is/ how hostage situations go across the universe..."

Silverbolt says, "Monstereo's right. Shouldn't you let one go as a gesture of good will?"

Inspector Goole shakes his head, tapping his hand on the table in a rhythmic gesture. "No no, I don't think so. We currently hold all the cards, I see no reason to give you an advantage, however slight." He gives a winning grin at Silverbolt. "You see, the bodies that your friends are in are ours. And while they are trapped in them, that means that THEY are ours. Do you follow?"

Silverbolt nods quietly....and keeps quiet. "So far, yes."

The door to the room sweeps open, a figure much smaller then the entry way itself stepping through, a aged gentlemen dressed in the uniform of a officer, a crimson badge affixed to his breast. Ulysess M. Agnus.. "Gentlemechs, Foxfire, situation report." asked the shrunken city commander as he joined the gathering.

Inspector Goole looks up and cheerfully waves to Ultra Magnus as he enters. "Ah hello, I was waiting for someone with real authority. My name's Goole." He extends his hand with a smile. "I am just here to talk about your total surrender to us, and the handing over of this world, in return for your lives. A very reasonable arrangement, I think"

Monstereo hrmms... "You're not pulling that shifty blood hypnosis trick are you, wolf in Goole's clothing, Mister Armatage Sloor? Oh, and would you care for some Slurm?"

Silverbolt looks over and hands Monstereo the computer....and the data card. "Take a look, Monstereo."

Ulysses M. Agnus.'s eyes turn down to the offered hand, scrutinizing it as if he suspected a viper to slither free from the palm. Eering on the side of caution, he did not accept the civil handshake. "I'm afraid that surrender is not a word that many of my soldiers, nor myself, are very familier with, Mister Ghoul." replied the officer, his hands folding behind his back, "Nor are we the proper organization to speak to about any sort of attempt of global conquest. We're extended visitors, much the same as you.." he answered, attentuion shifting to those gathered, "If my understanding of your situation is correct then you would know that the native population is not one that takes kindly to attempts of dominationby aliebn forces."

Inspector Goole taps his fingers on the desk in irritation. "The situation is this. We would like this planet, you would like your bodies back. In return for your surrender and annexation into our forces, you will also wrest control of this world for us. Then we will gladly return your bodies and everyone is happy." He pushes his fingers together, as polticians do whilst making deals. "I think it's really in everyones interest, don't you?"

Monstereo takes them and gives them his scientific scrutiny. With lots of hos and hums. "Hang on a second... whats this here?" He points to the screen, still holding it facing himself.

Inspector Goole gives Monstereo a grandfatherly smile. "What's what, young man? I am quite open to conversation, don't be shy"

Monstereo glances at the data card and then stares at the screen again. "Oh you wascilly wabbits you..." He smirks briefly and then lowers the screen back down to hooman eye level towards Sloor-Goole. "Care to explain yourself, Mister? You can't get one past me."

Ulysses M. Agnus.'s expression sours further as this stranger lays down the rules, "We are a race with origins steeped in slavery, Mister Ghoul." informed the City Commander, "Not many still functioning are old enough to remember such times but it is not a one of us that wouldn't fight bolt and screw to keep such a history from repeating. I doubt even the Decepticons would enter such a deal.." although it wouldn't be the first time that the Decepticons slithered underneath the low bar of moral expectations that he has set for them. Monstereo's utterences draw his attention finaly, the meat commander laying his attention solely on the Junkion, expecting a explination.

Inspector Goole smiles to Monstereo, leaning over and pointing at the screen as if a parent helping a child deal with a maths problem. "Ah, you are wondering where the bodies are exactly? They are stored in what we call Oord Space, a place that you Transformers have a limited understanding of and use it mostly for mass shifting, I believe. They are safe, and most importantly, secure." He turns to Magnus, still smiling. "Ah, then you are practiced at being slaves, very good, very good indeed. But do not see it as slavery, see it as a beneficial partnership. You get to keep your bodies and most importantly your lives, and we gain new recruits and an additional planet to the Great Cause."

Monstereo nods slightly. "I see, Mister Sloor. I see." He sets down the computer. "If you'll all excuse me..." He starts to wander away.

Silverbolt backs up out of earshot from the 'inspector' and out of sight.

Ulysses M. Agnus. had dug in his heels as to the matter of surrender.. He would not be the Autobot to hand over control over himself and his fellows while Prime was away. Drawing on some of his own marginal diplomatic ability, M. Agnus instead attempts to probe for information, a way to clear the fog of war. "Are you implying that you are ready to initiate open warfare against myself and my soldiers, Mister Ghoul.. or is there some.. other detail in this condition that we have yet to discover?"

Inspector Goole shrugs. "It is possible our forces could defeat yours, but it would be a protracted affair. That is why we favour stealth. However..." He flashes a grin at Magnus. "The bodies that you are currently trapped in are built by our best technicians, they are practically indistinguishable from the real thing, save for the smallest details at the smallest levels of the smallest dna strand." He picks up a pencil and waves it in the air as he pushes his point. "You see, we insure our technology, to prevent it falling into the wrong hands. With the merest flick of a switch on one of our monitor craft, we can ah, /reduce/ the life expectancy of any particular bodyform of our choosing. In cases of misappropriation or rogue agents."

And so there it was.. There was no way out, no path of peace.. To refuse them and resist meant that each and every one of his afflicted soldiers would die. To accept would mean being forced under the yoke of another self-proclaimed master race.

M. Agnus drew in a deep breath, working the situation around in his head, attempting to find some brush covered trail to safety. "This.. is not something I can just set into motion in the span of a single meeting, Mister Ghoul." responded the City Commander, his head canted forward, "I will need time to ease my subordinates into the transision.. aswell as contact the proper chain of command."

Inspector Goole clicks his briefcase shut with a click and stands up to shake Magnus's hand. "Of course, I quite understand. You have been very accomodating, I hope we can enter into a beneficial dialogue soon. You will find me at the Red Roof hotel where I have arranged lodgings. Of course, any attempt at coercing, attacking or otherwise disturbing me will result in severe penalties, to yourself and your bodies."

He starts towards the door, and then stops turning as if he had forgotten something. Flashing another smile, he takes out a fobwatch and checks the time. "Oh, one last thing sir. Upon my departure from the mothership, we had the lifescales on the bodies you are inhabiting adjusted. In a weeks time, you will drop dead. You have a week to agree." He doffs his hat. "Good day sir!"

Ulysses M. Agnus. can only scowl as the man departs, that last remark striking home like a nail into a coffin... It was time to get the Dinobots out of his office, there was work to do.