Jiggalo-Puffs

Summary: Some people, like Zarak, care about the credit crisis. Some people just want to catch some Pokemon.

The H.I.V.E. - Nebulos

The Highly Intelligent Vehicle Exterminators are an ultra-secret black division of the Ministry of Science, dedicated to preventing another robot disaster from ever befalling Nebulos again. All kinds of unethical research are conducted here. There are vast hangers and garages full of strange machinery, and dissection laboratories abound. Mysterious dark green tubes, which seem to have something growing inside, bubble malevolently. The place is cold, dim, and clammy overall, a dreadful place to work. There is a nice cafeteria, though.

Contents:

Misfire

Obvious exits: Up  leads to Ministry of Science - Nebulos.

Scorponok has arrived.

Slugslinger has arrived.

The huge towering form of Scorponok's fortress mode looms in the underground lair, finally repaired after the huge blutching it took from Galvatron. Weapons are bristling, missiles are loaded and...

..and in front at a table sits Lord Zarak, reading Nebulon Economy magazine

Yeah, yeah, fortresses are great and all, but that color scheme is absolutely dreadful. We need something more...better. Something more...pink. Something...something like..

"I'm B-O-R-E-D," Misfire shouts at Scorpobattlestation.

Aimless on the other hand is trying to read over Zarak's shoulder.

Vorath actually works here. He has a day job, you know, when he's not being the head of a lunatic bat. He is currently glaring soundlessly over the shoulder of a harried lab assistant. The lab assistant looks extremely nervous, beads of sweat rolling down his neck... and then Vorath walks away without a word, off to check on the next mad science station here.

Zarak is reading a rather exciting article about the state of Nebulan banks. Apparently there has been a credit crunch after a giant robot fell on a credit centre, crunching it all up. There are no pictures. "Really Aimless!" Zarak mutters, swatting at his minion, as he looks angrily at Vorath. "Vorath, are the repairs on Scorponok complete. There feels... weaknesses still. They must be found an eliminated!"

Caliburst, meanwhile, has no interest in what Zarak is reading. Unless the Nebulon Economy has reviews of local stage shows. He's wearing his full Targetmaster armour, save for his helmet, which is tucked underneath his arm. Caliburst is a method actor.

No pictures? Forget it then. Aimless grunts and scuffles off after being hit like an incontinent dog. "Zarak, dude, you need to mellow out. All this power hungry stuff is, like, bad for your heart, you know?" He snaps his fingers, "Oh! I have just the idea! Okay, check this out.. How 'bout I play you my new solo hit 'Holy Shit, I Turn Into A Gun'?"

Vorath is not in his Targetmaster armour, and he is instead wearing a rather severe and formal black outfit. He stops in his rounds and slowly turns around, considering the fortress that is sitting in one of the underground hangers. He murmurs, "One moment, my lord." Vorath pulls out a medical scanner and gets some readings on the fortress.

Combat: Mindwipe runs a diagnostic check on Battlestation

=
============[ Evaluation of Scorponok ]==========================

Scorponok is conscious and COMBAT-OK.

Scorponok is in perfect health.

=
=================================================================

Zarak is also not in his armour, he is in a snazzy casual suit. He sighs sadly at Aimless. "Aimless, we do not do this for a goal as feeble and worthless as /power/, it is for a far greater purpose. More and more Autobots arrive on this world every day. They must be driven off. And we must unite /closer/ with the Decepticons under Galvatron"

Aimless is totally only wearing the bottom half of his armor so he looks like a robot MC Hammer. "Yeah, yeah, like, whatever, man." He snaps his fingers idly for a few moments. "Oh, wait! Galvatron...Galvatron...which one is he again? The big purple one, right? Man, that guy's a dick."

Vorath frowns over the readings on the scanner, and he reports, "Sir, Scorponok is operating within nominal parameters. Could you describe the nature of these weaknesses you are feeling in greater detail, please?" He hopes that Zarak's old injuries are not acting up again. Vorath had thought that the *master process had cured the worst of the damage.

Caliburst snorts as Aimless talks about a 'hit'. Though he has no idea if that's true or not, his jealousy is strong enough to just grit his teeth, that someone might be successful where he is not. "Lord Zarak, /some/ of us are loyal to you and the cause, and would gladly give our lives for it!" Okay perhaps that was laid on a little too thick.

Meanwhile, Slugslinger has strolled in. "You want to check him for weaknesses? Hurr. Just get Misfire to open fire on him. Anywhere he /doesn't/ hit is a crucial point!" He spends the next few moments chuckling at his own joke, convinced of its hilarty. Jerk.

Zarak looks about the room icily, tapping his fingers against a table. "Later Vorath, later. For now we must move out, assess the damage and plan our next move!" He stands up, tapping his wrists together as his armor materialises from subspace around him. "Know this. For we may be judged traitors now, posterity will view us as heroes!"

Misfire sends a nasty glare at Slugslinger. "HURR HURRRR. You're SO FREAKIN' FUNNY, HURRRR" He crosses his arms and scoffs, "Jerk.."

Aimless shrugs, "Hey, man, I'm, like, totally loyal and stuff too, ya' know? It's just, maaan, half the time I don't know what's going on." He rubs his nose and sniffs loudly.

Vorath puts the scanner away and continues to frown, noting, "Mindwipe is currently damaged. He has very odd priorities. I do my best to curtail them, but it's difficult to make him see the importance of saving himself for more important tasks." Indeed, the bat is sprawled out in another hanger, napping, one of his wings in a crude medical sling. Vorath just rolls his eyes at the 'humour'.

Bi-Jet has just about finished laughing at the joke. "Thanks!" He says in response to Misfire. "Hey, cool, Misfire, hear that? Scorponok's new head reckons we're all gonna be heroes!" He points at Zarak, in case it's not clear which one Scorponok's head is.

Bi-Jet CAN POINT AS A JET, YES.

The Blue-and-Gray Bi-Jet flips over and unfolds into Slugslinger.

"Here Aimless, I will create a crib sheet for you!" Zarak whips out a piece of paper and a pen and hastily scribbles something down, which he then passes to Aimless.

It reads "OBEY ZARAK"

Then Zarak turns to Vorath. "I will tolerate no weakness!" he announces. "Scorponok brings not only death, he brings LIFE!" And the mechanical arms on the base mode of Scorponok start to whir at his voice, medical drills and weilding arms rising to wave over the fallen Mindwipe

Mindwipe continues to nap through the repairs and doesn't seem to be getting any better. It would seem that Scorponok's repair abilities are experiencing a bug. Vorath covers half his face with a hand and mutters, "I'll have that checked out, sir." More loudly. "Besides, I do have meetings I need to attend. While the rest of you are being heroes, someone has to make sure that the Ministry of Science marches on."

Zarak idly rubs at hit suit. "Hold Vorath. We need to ingrain ourselves closer with the Decepticons. Perhaps a /ruse/ using your unique... abilities would suit. Perhaps an unwilling Decepticon volunteer could be persuaded to... help us..."

Aimless stares at the sheet of paper for a while. "Hmm, well, I guess that makes sense. I'll just throw this in Misfire's briefcase or something, 'kay? Cool."

Misfire continues glaring at Slugslinger.

Slugslinger is now only vaguely aware that Misfire is still glaring. "...What?"

Misfire scoffs and waves a dismissive hand at Slugslinger. "Blue is sooooooooooooooooo out."

Vorath raises an eybrow, and his mouth quirks, one corner tipping upward. "What do you have in mind? Or rather, what you would like our /test subject/ to have in mind? I do need to speak with Hi-Test and Hi-Q," more unforunate names, those, "about the Alternative Final Solution or A.F.S., but that meeting can be rescheduled."

Slugslinger doesn't understand the statement. "What're you talking about, Misfire?"

Misfire places his hands on his hips and leans foreward, "Uhm, heelllloooooo!" He points at Slugslinger, his face contorted with disgust. "Blue? Really? /Really?/ What were you thinking? Blue is such a horrible color. Even brown would've been better than that hideous hue!"

Zarak strokes his chin. "I am not enamoured with AFS. It is crude and is only a short term solution. Still!" He creases his eyebrows. "Access codes to start. /Friendship/ with the other Decepticons. A smile can go a long way towards cementing relationships. And we need more scouting." He is staring at Aimless and Caliburst as he says this. "/Scouting/"

Snapdragon has arrived.

Slugslinger's optics narrow with far-too-late realization. "You sayin' something about the way I look?!"

Meanwhile, Caliburst, overhearing this conversation, just sighs and picks up his helmet, fastening it on. He goes over to Aimless and tap-taps him on the shoulder. He's gonna want to know about this. When Zarak speaks up, he turns to him and uninterestedly replies, "Scouting, got it, right."

Vorath shrugs and notes, "A.F.S. was the /only/ viable solution before I, ah, acquired the *master technology from Arcana, and I do not feel it is a waste of funds to develop the idea a bit more." His eyes close as Zarak suggests that Mindwipe should make friends and influence people, remembering how Mindwipe went out of his way to offend Soundwave. "Mmmyes. Perhaps I'll aim Mindwipe at some of the more... simple Decepticons."

"Oh, great detective work there, Sherlock!" Misfire sneers at Slugslinger.

Aimless is playing SpaceGameboy when Caliburst rudely interrupts him, "What? What is it? What do you want?"

"Yeah? And?" Slugslinger says, broadening his arms to give the illusion that he is much bigger than he is. "You tellin' me you want to make something about it?" He starts slowly approaching the other Targetmaster.

Caliburst sighs at Aimless. "I think we're going to need to go to work soon."

With Snapdragon's body safely stowed away in a hangar, the enarmoured(but sans helmet) Krunk is free to walk about the HIVE station without having to drag the huge Decepticon's filth everywhere. Krunk is far from fastidious, but even he cannot stand the obsessiveness to which Snapdragon soils himself. He says nothing, but loosk on curiously at the mention of the mysterious A.F.S.

"Yeah, maybe I am! What you gunna do about it? Huh? HUH?" He throws his arms out to either side, "Go ahead! I bet you're too much of a wuss-wuss to do nothin'!"

Aimless stares at his Gameboy. Then at Caliburst. Then at his Gameboy. "Man..I was so close to catching a Jigglypuff too.."

Vorath's pager goes off, and he excuses, "Ah. You must excuse me, sir. I really /must/ make this one meeting. The budget, you see. Very important." His voice is low and soothing but with an element of added command to it - now, he would never dream of /ordering/ Scorponok or Zarak, but persuading him? Perhaps. Either way, the scientist slips away.

Zarak smiles as behind him, Scorponok rumbles into life. "It is decided then!" he announces, as he decides the next course of action in his head. "Dock with Scorponok, we will liaise with the Decepticons in space!"

He pats Aimless' back. "Do not worry Aimless, there will be many of these Jiggalo-puffs for you where we are going!" He doesn't really understand new-fangled things

You move to the Ministry of Science - Nebulos.