2031 Olympics - Cloudraker Slalom/Bladdertree Obstacles/Companion Cube Steeplechase Triathlon

'Triathlon Stadium Range

A brilliant spot of interest among the otherwise dire working conditions of this inhospitable world, the stadium and all of its outparcels are constructed from mining rigs lashed together to make gargantuan platforms. Televising dirigibles clog the airspace, giving a clear view of the interior's Jumbotron screens, viewer seating, and the track. The three event sections splay out on different plinths of plascrete supported by the metallic olive-green spheres of bladdertree forests. A healthy Mesospheric Cloudraker, protected by the Assembly of Worlds, has parked its mile long, buoyant body over the first track. Floating overhead, its metal-leeching tentacles sway like a fringe of pearlescent pink telephone poles across the slalom tracks. Further along, a veritable maze of jungle gym bars, wall and rope climbs, and crawling courses are woven into the groves of bladdertrees. A pile of reinforced cubes lie at the start of the final leg of the track, which is laid out with a series of hoops and hurdles. The smooth sheen of the plascrete final home stretch promises to be a good old-fashioned Olympic sprint, reflecting promises of fame despite its backdrop of ominous cloudbanks filled with rustling shadows.

Contents:

Sikorsky S-61R Copter &lt;Sandstorm&gt;

Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt;

Tailgate

Darkwing

Boomslang

Grapple

Boomslang is in the arena poking a bladdertree with a stick. "Are these things going to explode? Is that giant floating octopus thing going to eat us? I'm having second thoughts about this event."

The Six Lasers camera drones are out in full force today. This event is now, and they want to shoot all the angles. There is also a rather steampunk hot air balloon floating on the scene near the audience stands, its ballon mostly made of colourful scraps and the burner made of bright brass. A little goblin in goggles sits in the woven wicked basket and has a microphone, and he announces, "Welcome, one and all, to the first ever Cloudraker Slalom/Bladdertree Obstacles/Companion Cube Steeplechase! Our contestants are at the starting line," the cameras pan over to where a starting line has been marked on a meta-leeching tentacle of Mesospheric Cloudraker, "and soon enough, they'll be off, trying to avoid entanglement with tentacles and crosswind gusts!"

"I didn't know you were such a Wuss, Boomslag." Darkwing replies as he looks around the arena. "Surely a great warrior such as yourself has nothing to fear from a few trees or explosions."

Galvatron has arrived.

Sikorsky S-61R Copter &lt;Sandstorm&gt; doesn't really have an idea what's going on here, but that's sort of the point of being here in the first place, hovering lazily over what's suppose to be the starting line to keep from getting swept away in the funky gas giant environment. "They better explode, this is going to be boring otherwise!"

Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt;, little yellow Seeker, is here for the event, putting in a good show for the Empire because at some point or another, he had heard that the Emperor likes metals, and even though he doesn't really want to stand out, he figures that it's safest to put in an effort. He balances back and forth in alternate mode, hovering as best he can in the winds. "It can only eat you if it grabs you," he observes softly.

Tailgate has disconnected.

Grapple really has very little idea how he had gotten in to this mess. His intention had only been to watch the event from the stands; curiosity and all, wondering how these games were played. It seemed to be a good idea at the time! ..And then, somehow, someone mistook him for a contestant and there he was. For some reason, all he can feel is amused. After all, someone's going to realize he doesn't belong there sooner or later. It couldn't be TOO bad until then, right?

"You don't get to be a great warrior by being stupid about alien monsters," Boomslang replies wryly, satisfied for now that the bladdertree bladders aren't -obviously- explosive. "All that gets you is being 'that guy who got eaten by the giant spider.'

"Actually, the Mesospheric Cloudraker can eat you if you so much as touch it," the goblin announces cheerily. "Those tentacles leech metal on contact - not enough to kill you if you don't stick around long, but I hear it is plenty uncomfortable for you clockwork golems. But here we go," he holds up something that looks vaguely like a bazooka and blows on one end, letting loose a sound like a trumpet crossed with a thundercrack.

Combat: Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; compares his Agility to 50: Failure :(

Combat: Grapple compares his Agility to 50: Failure :(

"If you worry about your saftey You'll never get anywhere." Darkwing replies, but then this is one of the Gloomjets talking, they some how seem to survive anything even if they don't want to. "You're going to suffer in the universe anyway, no point in trying to avoid it."

Combat: Sikorsky S-61R Copter &lt;Sandstorm&gt; compares his Agility to 50: Success!

Combat: Darkwing compares his Agility to 50: Success!

Galvcannon &lt;Galvatron&gt; appears to be sitting in a VIP booth over the stadium. This VIP booth is held up not by pillars or support struts, but by helium balloons. Propellers on the bottom keep the booth from drifting away.

"DO NOT FAIL ME, DECEPTICONS!" Galvatron yells from his booth. "Even when we are not actively engaged in war, we must take every opportunity to humiliate the Autobots!"

The artillery cannon's back section snaps apart into two legs, its treads convert to arms, and the main body slides down as GALVATRON rises up before you!

Galvatron is in that mode, actually. :o

Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; is obviously having an off day! He darts forward in between two tentacles, attempting to duck between them, but at just the wrong moment wind pushes him downwards and he finds himself stuck on one of the tentacles which start to eat off the bottom layer of metal. Gasp!

"See, I'm glad I asked," Boomslang tells Darkwing smugly. "You can't win if you're grabbed by an energy vampire space octopus. Let's hit it, Decepticons! Gold for Galvatron!" He jumps into the air and transforms to blast off along the course, trying to swerve around the various obstacles, especially the tentacles.

With the usual ratcheting sound, Boomslang spins and flips and turns into a fighter jet.

Combat: F/A-18E "Super Hornet" &lt;Boomslang&gt; compares his Agility to 50: Success!

"Have fun yappin' about it guys, I'll see ya at the finish line. Yeehah!" The triplechanger zips off as soon as the starting 'gun' is fired. When the tentacles start trying to grab Sandstorm weaves and bobs, even flipping upside down a few times and making impressive use of a helicopter's maneuverability in general to make his way through the attempts to eat him. "It's like Air Raid says: Don't look first or you may never leap!"

Grapple pays attention to the goblin in the hot air balloon, at least; he isn't taking this as a complete joke on his end. Avoid the appendages from the cloudraker; good to know, good to know. Though, hearing Galvatron yell from the VIP booth causes him to boggle a moment; somehow, he doubts the Decepticons will need much help in the humiliation factor. After all, he's an architect; he isn't all that athletic. At all. In fact, as he tries to simple run between the tentacles in much the same manner as Fleet, he isn't nearly fast enough and an ankle is wrapped up. He tries to hit it to get it off, hissing in pain.

Darkwing shows his lack of fear of the Plant as he flies right through the tenticles and other obsticales, effortlessly avoiding them. "If it happens, it happens Boomslag. Best to face the suffering head on then hoping you can continue on without facing it in a ignorant lifestyle."

Combat: Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; misses himself with his Seekerhugs! (Grab) attack!

Combat: Grapple misses himself with his Grab attack!

Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; is too slow to avoid the tentacles, but too fast to get free. :(

The little yellow Seeker struggles to escape from the tentacles. Though he's a trained escape artist, it's just not enough!

Combat: Sikorsky S-61R Copter &lt;Sandstorm&gt; compares his Agility to 90: Success!

The goblin looks delighted as Fleet and Grapple are waylaid by trouble, and he cackles, pointing a knobby clawed finger at them. "Hah, look at those stuck suckers! Nothing like..." He looks at the list, "A snake and the cartoon duck! Oh, and that whirlybird, too."

Combat: Darkwing compares his Agility to 90: Failure :(

Combat: Darkwing strikes himself with his Grab attack!

Grapple is really, really not good at this. For the most part, he's also completely unsurprisd that he was taken out so early. Though, he's also worried at the prolonged exposure to the hold on his foot. Not entirely certain if it's legal or not to blast at the creature, he simply keeps on flailing and hitting at the tendril.

Whoah, sudden tentacles! "How do you and Dreadwind stand eachother? Do you spend a lot of time sighing and nodding together or is it more like each of you makes the other one want to jump into a smelting pool?" asks Boomslang, flaring air brakes and trying to haul his nose around to get through the rapidly narrowing space.

Combat: F/A-18E "Super Hornet" &lt;Boomslang&gt; compares his Agility to 90: Success!

F/A-18E "Super Hornet" &lt;Boomslang&gt; pulls up alongside Sandstorm. "Hey, what's up. Guess who's got two thumbs and is going to win this event."

Darkwing says, "He mostly complains about the how futile it is to do anything, and I complain about how its futile to not do anything. So we don't really." He luaghs darkly. "But we still seem stuck to be partnered togeather." He says and is unfortuatly too slow for the next wave that comes his way; though true to his beliefs, he doesn't show much pain as they start to rip metal from is body, almost seeming to enjoy the pain."

Oof. Tough one for the other Autobot. "I'll come rescue you after I win!" Sandstorm calls back to Grapple. Snorts a bit as Boomslang comes buzzing along as well. "Not in that mode you don't!" he calls back, even as he's weaving out of the way of more attempts at grabbing him.

Combat: Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; misses himself with his Seekerhugs! (Grab) attack!

Combat: Grapple strikes himself with his Grab attack!

Combat: Sikorsky S-61R Copter &lt;Sandstorm&gt; compares his Agility to 70: Success!

"Nnnnngh!" emits the yellow Seeker as the thing starts to eat through his armor, now beginning to feel pain. "C... can't get out of this thing!" He's starting to feel a bit panicked!

Combat: Darkwing strikes himself with his Grab attack!

Grapple is shocked to find that, by some miracle, the 'hit it until it stops' method actually works after a time. The tentacle pulls back and lets go! It only takes a few seconds more to get to his feet and run off to the next part. ..And just runs right past the still trapped Fleet without a glance.

There are torrential wind gusts now, making it hard to avoid being blown into the tentacles. The goblin tosses a tether down from his ballon, and a Six Laser's staffer secures it, for now, so that his balloon isn't snatched up by the massive beast. He comments, "That whirlybird is doing very well, it seems. Much merchandise will be sold in his likeness, if he keeps it up!"

Combat: F/A-18E "Super Hornet" &lt;Boomslang&gt; compares his Agility to 70: Success!

"You're just underestimating the advantages of being a fighter jet because you're a helicopter," Boomslang sneers, using his severe angle-of-attack abilities to swerve and blast around lashing tendrils and drifting sucking claws. "Rotary racist!"

Darkwing rolls his optics at Fleet's panic, as he rips free from the the tenticle. "Can't you just suffer in peace? You're starting to get annoying." He comments as he flies off to get away from both the tenticle and the annoying crybaby seeker.

Sikorsky S-61R Copter &lt;Sandstorm&gt; spins a full 360 degrees as one of the tendrils tries to grab his tail-rotor. Fortunatelly being a helicopter he doesn't have to stop to spin around, and in fact when he pulls up to Boomslang again he's actually still flying in reverse. Go go stunt-flying. "Complain all you want, jetboy, it's working!"

Combat: Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; sets his defense level to Fearless.

Combat: Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; strikes himself with his Seekerhugs! (Grab) attack!

Combat: Grapple compares his Agility to 90: Failure :(

Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; transforms to slip out from the tentacles, taking advantage of the size shift, then takes off, transforming again in an attempt to catch up with the others. He doesn't answer

Darkwing, because he's not really worried about being annoying when he's being molested by tentacles.

Combat: Darkwing compares his Agility to 70: Success!

Grapple got through the first tentacle beast earlier than one contestant, at least! ..But there's still a number of them all over the place, and he still isn't quite as good at the ones in the lead. Really, he isn't doing well at all, barely dodging and stumbling every few steps; this just isn't something he was made for. Even with the earlier grab to his leg, though, this is strangely entertaining. ...Until his -other- leg gets caught. And now he's smacking the tentacle again.

Darkwing continues to dart about around the Tenticles and through the crosswinds, letting the others find for themsevles as they continue to try and avoid looking like they are in one of those japanese movies.

There is a staging area for Boomslang and Sandstorm to wait as the other contestant finish up their slalom. Next up are the Bladdertree Obstacles, if they want to study the field. Ahead of them are walls, ropes, monkey bars, and bladdertree bulbs that can be used as stepping stones. However, those bladdertrees are filled with explosive gas, so they'd better be careful. The goblin announces, "Three points to the snake and the whirlybird for finishing neck and neck! Two points to the cartoon duck, coming up behind them. Will the yellow coward or the orange construction worker claim the last point?"

Darkwing says, "You might want to be careful announcer, I've leveled theme parks for similar comments.""

Sikorsky S-61R Copter &lt;Sandstorm&gt; transforms and lands on the waiting point. "Well that was a fun start." Folds his hands behind the cowling of his head. "Hope the next part is a -challenge- though."

With a quick flip and the roar of an engine, Sandstorm takes off in dunebuggy mode, leaving a cloud of dust in his wake.

Combat: Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; sets his defense level to Protected.

Combat: Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; compares his Agility to 90: Success!

"Grr," grumbles Boomslang to himself. That Wreckercopter is not slowing down! And nothing seems to be hitting him! He transforms and crosses his arms over his chest, trying to think of a way to cheat in the next course of the event, and smoking. From the jet exhausts in his heels.

The F-18 produces that distinctive transformation sound as it flips around and pops out limbs to assume a humanoid shape.

Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; is back in the game, twisting, twirling, and dancing between the tentacles, now closing the distance with the re-stuck Grapple as he darts this way and that, ignoring the commentary from the others!

Combat: Grapple strikes himself with his Grab attack!

Combat: Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; compares his Agility to 70: Success!

Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; is neck and neck with... the Autobot! The blasted non-flying Autobot! How embarrassing! He pours on the speed, trying to pull ahead, but will he make it?

Combat: Grapple compares his Agility to 70: Failure :(

Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; squeaks ahead, avoiding a last few tentacles and gaining that last point.

Grapple seems to be pretty good at the 'hit them until they stop moving' technique! So, there he is, once again trying to dodge and weave and -- oh, hey, the flier that had been in last place is suddenly right at his side! And as one particularly large tendril gets in front of him, he's forced to step back and lose on even getting a single point this round. Last place! Augh!

"And there's the yellow iron bird bringing up the back of the pack! One point to Slytherin," announcers the goblin, who seems unperturbed by Darkwing's threats. Some Six Lasers Staffers move out to help Grapple to staging area where Boomslang is smoking around all the flammable balloons. The next segment of the course insists of bladdertrees lashed together in their forest, with obstacles set up on them. "For the first round of the Obstacle Course, there's a wall and a rope climb - but careful the rope doesn't break and the wall doesn't fall down on you. You never know when a SPY," does he looks over at Boomslang now? "has sapped the wall, after all!"

Combat: Grapple compares his Strength to 60: Failure :(

With a lightning fast flip and twist, Sandstorm lands in his robot mode, ready for action.

Combat: Darkwing compares his Strength to 60: Success!

Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; transforms into his Fleet mode.

Combat: Fleet compares his Strength to 60: Failure :(

Combat: Sandstorm compares his Strength to 60: Success!

Fleet transforms and lines up for the next event, then frowns at the bladdertrees. He shrugs, then runs forward, and jumps for one of the ropes. He gets halfway up the wall when the rope snaps, and he lands in a heap at the bottom! The yellow Seeker sighs. "This just isn't my day," he murmurs.

Boomslang rubs his hands together and grabs the rope. "This part seems a bit stupid for those of us who can just FLY over walls," he asides to the struggling Fleet as he prepares to give it the ol' Aerospace Academy try.

Combat: Boomslang compares his Strength to 60: Success!

Argh! Boomslang's triumphant stance at the top is ruined by that Wrecker coming up after him!

Fusillade has arrived.

"I guess they've got to give the poor Autobots their fair chance." Darkwing says as he graps the ropes and starts to work his way over the wall.

Grapple being helped to the staging area is only slightly humiliating. Only slightly. Since he isn't really supposed to be there, and all. At least, he keeps telling himself that. ..Oh, hey, now there's these ominously-named bladdertrees that may or may not explode! He jumps at a rope, as well, and.. It snaps. So, he falls, not too far from Fleet. "..I'm really not good at this at all."

Sandstorm gives Grapple a pat on the shoulder as the architech is pulled onto the platform. "Don't feel bad buddy, you -tried-. That's more than some people do all their lives! But now if you'll excuse me." He sprints off, and when he comes to the climb doesn't have a problem with hoisting himself up quickly. He does this sort of thing for excersize! "Sure, fly, yeaaah.. if you wanna do it the -easy- way!"

After the walls and ropes, there are monkey bars set up on top of some bladdertree bulbs. All of this is indeed a bit asinine for the fliers, but the camera crews floating about seem to enjoy humiliating those born to the sky, and are certain to record Fleet's untimely fall, as well as Boomslang's triumphant climb, frustration and glory in two ratings-boosting shots. The monkey bars are very narrow and cramped - easy to get stuck in the corners.

Combat: Fleet sets his defense level to Fearless.

Combat: Sandstorm compares his Size to 5: Success!

Combat: Darkwing compares his Size to 5: Success!

Combat: Grapple strikes himself with his Grab attack!

Fleet, luckily, doesn't have much in the way of a sense of pride. He gets back to his feet, shrugs, and makes a leap for the remains of the rope.

Combat: Fleet misses himself with his Seekerhugs! (Grab) attack!

Fleet fails to grab the rope and falls to the ground again. :(

"But..." Boomslang looks up at the monkey bars. There's no way his wings are going to fit through that, but them's the rules. He can at least try to tuck them back and maybe squeeeze through.

Combat: Boomslang compares his Size to 5: Success!


 * pop*

Boomslang pops out of the other side with a noise like a wine cork.

The goblin comments, "Good show of ball and socket joints, snake golem!"

Grapple sighs up at the rope; luckily, not too much of it had snapped, so he makes another grab for what's left. Surprisingly, it holds, this time, and gets to climb back up! Horay!

"Com'n people, yer not gonna let me win this easily I hope!" Thank goodness he doesn't have a heap of kibble sticking off like some designs, not to mention use to wiggling into tight spaces as a recon op. Sandstorm squirms through the openings with little trouble and clunks out the other end.... Oddly he's actually glad to see the two jets make it through, because that means he's still got a challenge to compete against.

Darkwing amkes his way through the monkeybars, seemign to have little care for the humilation. Though he was hoping to see Boomslag live up to his name and get blown up, but just this luck the other jet makes it through.

The third round is the most dangerous - they must bounce across bladdertree bulbs as if they were stepping stones. If they fall and cannot fly, they may fall to their dooms. If they step on the wrong bulb, it may explode. The goblin announcer laughs just thinking about it. he announces, "It will take /wisdom/ to chose a safe path, but while these clockwork men are mighty, are they, like the tin man, in need of a brain?"

Fleet hasn't even gotten across the second round! He frowns, crosses his arms, and taps his foot. Then he grabs a *different* rope and tries to climb it.

Combat: Fleet misses himself with his Seekerhugs! (Grab) attack!

Combat: Sandstorm compares his Intelligence to 60: Failure :(

The wall falls over on Fleet. :(

Combat: Darkwing compares his Intelligence to 60: Failure :(

Combat: Grapple compares his Size to 5: Failure :(

Sandstorm pffffs as he starts stepping from. "The trick is to just go faster than they can bl--" Sandstorm is cut off by one of said bulbs exploding just as he steps on it, and then gets knocked backwards again. He tumbles, but manages to grab one of the non-exploding ones before he falls off somewhere he's not going to be able to get up from. "--So they blow up faster than I thought," he murmurs as he dangles there.

"Maybe I can't outrace you," Boomslang asides to Sandstorm in a low voice, "But I can OUTWIT you. Watch this! I dare you to try to keep up." What's he got against Sandstorm anyhow? Boomslang ignites his jets and launches towards the bladdertrees in a power-assisted leap, cutting them off and trying to land on his toes so that he doesn't touch the landing bladders with the hot exhaust nacelles.

Combat: Boomslang compares his Intelligence to 60: Success!

Grapple blinks widely at the monkey bars that end up being next up on the obstacle course of doom. Oh, he just knows this isn't going to go well. Still, with a sigh, he grabs for them and tries to just make it through. Try to get at least one point in this.. Whole.. Crazy.. ... Aaaand he's stuck. Somehow or another, the little wheels on one leg actually gets caught on the bars and he can't pull it loose. "Seriously..?" Tug.

It seems Darkwing's natural 'luck' continues with him, as it is he who gets blown up rather then Boomslag. First one he choose, and it blows up under him, cuasing him to fall into the pit untill he recovers and his ability of flight kicks in.

"Ha ha!" Boomslang laughs uncharitably, pointing at the dangling Wrecker. And Darkwing, whom he doesn't like much more, really.

The goblin announces, "Ah, the snake is wise! Three points to him. The whirlybird and the dark cloud are not so clever, not so clever by half. The construction worker is having trouble in the monkey bars - strange, is it not like a scaffold, for him? And the walls are closing in on the canary."

Boomslang nevertheless draws his combat knife and slashes a slender bladdertree limb, holding it out towards Darkwing to try to help him back onto the course level. If one Decepticon wins, all Decepticons win! Sort of.

Combat: Sandstorm sets his defense level to Fearless.

Combat: Sandstorm misses himself with his Grab attack!

Combat: Fleet misses himself with his Seekerhugs! (Grab) attack!

Fleet remains buried by the wall, way back at the beginning of the course. :(

Combat: Grapple strikes himself with his Grab attack!

Combat: Darkwing strikes himself with his Grab attack!

Darkwing takes the branch as it is offered and climbs back on to the course, he is mildly surprised at the bit of comradery; and even offers a grim "Thanks." in return, knowing he'd likely not have done the same if postions were reversed.

Sandstorm swings back and forth a few times, before finally flipping himself back onto a safe stance that's not going to blow up on him. But it takes most of his effort to do that

It only takes a few tugs for Grapple to get his leg loose from the bars. From there, grumbling along the way, the orange-ish architect makes his way more or less easily across the monkey bars. But then there's the bladdertrees. Who named these things, at any rate? Well.. No where to go but in.

Combat: Sandstorm strikes himself with his Grab attack!

The goblin looks absolutely shocked and has to nibble down some miniature pumpkins to settle his stomach. He exclaims, "Teamwork amoung thieves? What is this? With the snake's help, the dark cloud earns two points to his name, which is..." he fumbles for his list, "...Darkwing?"

Combat: Grapple compares his Intelligence to 60: Failure :(

Fleet finally gets out from underneath that darned wall, but he's a bit flatter than he used to be. He sighs, then heads for the monkey bars, attempting to slip past them.

Combat: Fleet compares his Size to 5: Failure :(

Fleet gets stuck in the monkey bars. :( And to think, he's a trained escape artist!

Specter has arrived.

Sandstorm squants on his new spot for a moment, peering at the bulbs... and notices that the ones ready to blow have a slightly different 'ripe' color to them. With that in mind he can finish sprinting across the course, jumping over the ones that have the ready to blow color to avoid any more mishaps.

"He's got dark wings," Boomslang explains, cupping his hands by his mouth to project up at the goblin.

"You can have the Silver," Boomslang replies to Darkwing, looking pleased with himself.

There is a goblin announcer in a steampunk balloon floating among the bladdertrees and roving camera crews and Six Lasers staffers cover the area. As Sansdtorm makes it to the staging area, the goblin announces, "One point to the whirlybird." Again, staffers go out to help Grapple and Fleet to the next staging are, now that points have been awarded, but the next challenge is... the Companion Cube Steeplechase! In the staging area, there are Companion Cubes just waiting for the participants to be carried along a dragstrip. However, a flock of shrikebats has been released, and they darken the sky, just waiting to attack.

Grapple is apparently just as good at jumping along exploding bladdertrees as he is at everything else in this game; perhaps five leaps are taken in to the forest of sorts when he moves just a liiiittle bit in the wrong direction. He has a brief moment to realize it, before.. BOOM.

Darkwing looks to Boomslang as to informs the goblin. "I almost fear to think what you'd say about Dreadwind..." He replies with a simpe nod to the Silver comment.

Combat: Grapple compares his Accuracy to 70: Failure :(

Combat: Darkwing compares his Accuracy to 70: Failure :(

Combat: Sandstorm compares his Accuracy to 70: Failure :(

Fleet is helped to the next event. He looks around, checking a moment to see if Galvatron is still in the stands. When he sees that the Decepticon leader is, his wings droop and he takes up a yellow cube with a little cyan heart on it. Then, with a run, makes towards the hurdles and hoops! Will his (bad) luck hold?

Combat: Fleet compares his Accuracy to 70: Success!

Fleet manages to clear the hurdles and slip through the hoops, all while holding onto the cube! Who'd have thunk it?

Boomslang finds a cube in blue-grey naval camo. "This is my cube! This cube was meant for me!" he exclaims, hugging it jealously to his chest. But then, a looming cloud of shrikebats, swarming and screeching, wheeling and flailing their hideous tendrils, descends towards the course! Boomslang tucks his cube under his arm and transforms (apart from that arm) in a jiffy, taking off as he tries to outrun the shrikebats!

With the usual ratcheting sound, Boomslang spins and flips and turns into a fighter jet.

Combat: F/A-18E "Super Hornet" &lt;Boomslang&gt; compares his Accuracy to 70: Success!

Grapple has to be, once again, helped along. Did he gain a point? Somehow, he hadn't heard. He's still a bit unsteady from the last few events, but he still manages to pick up and hold the little orange cube with little hearts on it well enough. ..Oh, hey, flying creature things. At the go, he runs! ..He trips! ..He's really not good at this and is now on his face. At least the cube is protected underneath him?

Darkwing finds the nearly Monocrome blue Cube of his own and picks it up, but quickly fumbles as He makes it through the hoop, but the stupid cube doesn't. Appearntly even it doesn't want to be his companion.

Sandstorm peers at a cube as he picks it up. "... Okay, now the designer of this course is just getting morbid." He hops over a few hurdles, but when it comes to the hoop, he jumps through... but the cube gets stuck because it's corners are wider than the hoop. He tugs a few times, grunting. "It's like trying to get a square peg through a round hole!" Stupid heart marked box!

The goblin grins and says wistfully, "Shrikebat onna stick with ketchup... I remember my momma used to make that. Any organic kids tuning in, be sure to bag your parents to buy some shrikebat onna stick with ketchup from our lovely vendors!" A pan shot to a bored teenager hawking shrikebat onna stick with ketchup. "Looks like luck has changed for the canary, and the snake... I have no idea what he just did, but I think we may have to censor it." The goblin frowns. After the hurdles and hoops, there is a straightaway, designed for the speed demons to really let loose.

Combat: Grapple strikes himself with his Grab attack!

Combat: Sandstorm strikes himself with his Grab attack!

Combat: Fleet compares his Velocity to 70: Failure :(

Combat: Darkwing strikes himself with his Grab attack!

Sandstorm finally manages to wiggle the cube around enough to get it through. "Bad companion cube!" He tucks it under his arm and starts sprinting as fast as he can to catch up to the next area.

Fleet, fool that he is, fails to transform, and so doesn't manage to outrace an attack of shriekbats. Ack!

Grapple actually pouts a moment, pretty certain he was going to perform as badly this round as he did the previous two. Still, he gets back up, holds the adorable cube close and leaps through the hoops. Shockingly, he actually gets through, this time! Maybe he'll get a point yet!

F/A-18E "Super Hornet" &lt;Boomslang&gt; rockets away from the shrikebat swarm at barely under Mach 1 (he can't go supersonic with the drag from having one forearm sticking out of his fuselage holding a Companion Cube), some of the goblin-faced batwing creatures swooping down towards him from above and in front. "You're not stopping me now!" he says, and tries to open up the afterburners a little more even while carrying his Cube.

Combat: F/A-18E "Super Hornet" &lt;Boomslang&gt; compares his Velocity to 70: Failure :(

"Argh, get off of me!" Boomslang shouts, shrikebats latching onto his flight surfaces and wrestling with him for his Cube.

Darkwing grumbs and looks to the cube, he walks around to the other side and decides to do what he does best... Resort to violence. He pulls his fist back and punches the cube denting it while sending it flying out of the hoop and clobberign a poor shrikebat as it lands on it. The grumpy jets makes his way over and picks it up once more. "Lets see if your more cooperable this time..."

The goblin tsks, "Silly canary doesn't take flight... but it does the snake no good, either. Shrikebats just love Companion Cubes, which resembe their natural prey, and once a swarm has attacked, they are tenacious. The stragglers are catching up!"

Leaping into the air, Darkwing transforms into a Panavia Tornado GR1 fighter jet

F/A-18E "Super Hornet" &lt;Boomslang&gt; takes a moment to try to imagine the cuboid natural prey of the horrible grasping shrikebat species, performing an aileron roll through a flaming hoop to try to shake off the bats.

Combat: Panavia Tornado GR1 Fighter Jet &lt;Darkwing&gt; compares his Velocity to 70: Success!

Combat: F/A-18E "Super Hornet" &lt;Boomslang&gt; sets his defense level to Fearless.

Combat: F/A-18E "Super Hornet" &lt;Boomslang&gt; misses himself with his Grab attack!

With a quick flip and the roar of an engine, Sandstorm takes off in dunebuggy mode, leaving a cloud of dust in his wake.

Combat: Grapple compares his Velocity to 70: Failure :(

F/A-18E "Super Hornet" &lt;Boomslang&gt; breaks the flaming hoop, remains covered in bats.

Combat: Combat Dunebuggy &lt;Sandstorm&gt; compares his Velocity to 70: Failure :(

Combat: Fleet strikes himself with his Seekerhugs! (Grab) attack!

Fleet transforms into his Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; mode.

Panavia Tornado GR1 Fighter Jet &lt;Darkwing&gt; decides not to mess around with this annoying Shrikebatts, and transforms, takign the stupid cube with him and rocketsw through the swarms, lettign his thrusters ignite any that are too close to him.

Combat Dunebuggy &lt;Sandstorm&gt; pauses a moment to watch all the shriekbats hound the decepticon fliers. ".. Maybe sticking to the ground would be best." He transforms, the cube partially wedging in the rollbars of his cab, and takes off in his usual wake of dust... But some of the bats decide to dive towards him anyways. "Dangit!" He's veering back and forth to avoid being bitten, but covering less distance that way.

Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; finally remembers to transform, tucking his cube into his cockpit as he does. With a roar of jet engines, he breaks out of the crowd of shriekbats and races ahead of them.

Grapple gets through the hoops, but what's this? Bat-like things with long noses that are diving at him! "Agh!" The architect flails and yells as a shrikebat steals the poor companion cube right out of his hands. So, there he goes, all but helplessly chasing the shrikebat while yet others are trying to bite him!

Fortress Maximus has arrived.

More shrikebats are released, and the sky grows dark from their teeming numbers. The whoop and screech raucously, and at the sight of the cubes, they grow increasingly aggressive. This last gauntless is harrowing and not for the weak of character. One will need sterling leadership qualities to charm a way through the hungry mob.

F/A-18E "Super Hornet" &lt;Boomslang&gt; transforms to deploy his integral autocannon more effectively, spraying 20mm fire around (causing detonations in the bladdertrees) as he tries to fend off the shrikebats from his cube. "Go on without me, Fleet! We can't stop here!" The reason why should be obvious by now.

The F-18 produces that distinctive transformation sound as it flips around and pops out limbs to assume a humanoid shape.

Combat: Boomslang misses himself with his Grab attack!

Combat: Grapple strikes himself with his Grab attack!

Combat: Panavia Tornado GR1 Fighter Jet &lt;Darkwing&gt; compares his Leadership to 50: Failure :(

Combat: Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; compares his Leadership to 50: Failure :(

One of the shrikebats snatches Boomslang's Companion Cube and starts flying away with it. :(

Combat: Combat Dunebuggy &lt;Sandstorm&gt; strikes himself with his Grab attack!

Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; is totally going to go on without Boomslang, because he doesn't much care about Boomslang. However, he's mobbed by more shriekbats, being not particularly charming. He hisses and transforms, drawing his energy daggers in an attempt to slash them away.

Tetrajet &lt;Fleet&gt; transforms into his Fleet mode.

If there was just one thing Darkwing wasn't, and really there were a lot of things he weren't, it was charismatic. He is quickly swarmed by the bats wanting to take revenge on him makign roasted treats out of their families a few moments ago.

"Okay, enough playing around..." Sandstorm's exhaust roar as he opens the trottle full, and takes tearing down the track while blasting up one his namesake sand clouds behind him to throw the stupid shriekbats off his case. "EAT MY DUST! YEEEEEHA!"

The shrikebat with Grapple's companion cube flies too far out of his reach. But the architect -- after smacking a different flying critter out of his face -- raises his hose arm up at the thief and -- by some miracle -- manages to hit the creature with a spray of liquid cement! ..At least, he thinks it's liquid cement. Frankly, he never checked. Regardless, the shrikebat goes down, and Grapple regains his little yellow cubey friend. He picks it up and runs again!

The goblin shakes his head sadly, safely in his gaudy balloon. "The canary and the raven are not doing so well! They have no finesse, no knack for mob psychology. So the whirlybird and the construction worker are hot on their heels."

Combat: Fleet sets his defense level to Fearless.

Combat: Fleet strikes himself with his Seekerhugs! (Grab) attack!

Combat: Combat Dunebuggy &lt;Sandstorm&gt; compares his Leadership to 50: Success!

Combat: Boomslang strikes himself with his Grab attack!

Combat: Grapple compares his Leadership to 50: Success!

Combat: Panavia Tornado GR1 Fighter Jet &lt;Darkwing&gt; strikes himself with his Grab attack!

Fleet kills enough of the little beasties to get out of the crowd, and with his cube still in hand as well! He flies forward, screaming, as he tries to escape the monsters. Unknowingly, he crosses the finish line, but he keeps flying.

Combat Dunebuggy &lt;Sandstorm&gt; sees the REALLY FREAKIN' HUGE mob of bats swarming up ahead... but doesn't slow down in the least. "Outta my way, ya lame Ratbat wannabes.... WRECK 'N' RULE!" Topped off with the blare of his horn as he just barrels right into the mob headed for the finish line.

Boomslang takes off after the shrikebat which took his Cube, gunning it down and snatching the Cube out of midair to resume pursuit. He's fallen behind but moving fast!

Boomslang finds other people there when he gets there. "Is there at least turbocake?"

Panavia Tornado GR1 Fighter Jet &lt;Darkwing&gt; starts to open fire on the shrikebats as he accelerated through them and past the finish line

Grapple has apparently had enough with all the shrikebats. He stalks forward and simply sprays left and right, holding the little innocent companion cube as he goes. Somehow, it actually works!

Flashes go off, pelting Sandstorm, Fleet, Grapple, and Darkwing, and the goblin announces, "Three points to the whirlybird, the canary, the raven, and the construction worker. Oh, but the snake is lagging behind, so let's wait for him to finish before we tally the points!"

There is cake. It's made out of shrikebats, so it's kind of gross and inedible for robots. Worse than a lie? You decide.

Combat Dunebuggy &lt;Sandstorm&gt; spins a couple of donuts after passing the finish line, transforming as he does so and ends the last turn in robot mode. "Whoohoo! Now that's my sorta event!" He hoists the Companion Cube over his head for a moment... And then whacks it to the ground in what was suppose to be a touchdown spike, but being a weighted cube it just thumps on the ground. Not that he notices as he's busy doing a little victory dance. "We brought it, oh yeah, we brought it, oh yeah!" With a lightning fast flip and twist, Sandstorm lands in his robot mode, ready for action.

Combat: Boomslang compares his Leadership to 50: Failure :(

Boomslang fails to inspire the bats with righteous and patriotic words! "Augh, not again!" he exclaims, aggrieved at just HOW badly these bats want his Cube.

Grapple somehow actually crosses the finish line and ISN'T in last place for this round. Nothing short of a miracle, that. His yellow-ish companion cube is gently set on the ground before he simply.. Waits.

MUCH LATER: Boomslang straggles in covered in bat parts and clutching his Cube, with a twitch in his eye that says he's ready to machinegun any organic thing he sees, bat or no. "Did I win?"

The goblin announces, "Actually, sea snake... yes! With these two points you finally earned. The sea snake wins out on points, even if this last event wasn't his best, but the whirlybird and the raven are tied, and so it must be settled - eat the cake!" The horrible shrikebat cake that is probably going to ruin their fuel filters. Are they man enough to do it to settle the silver?

Combat: Panavia Tornado GR1 Fighter Jet &lt;Darkwing&gt; compares his Courage to 70: Success!

Combat: Sandstorm compares his Courage to 70: Success!

With the sound ot turnign gears ans shifting metal, Darkwing changes into his ever blue robot mode.

Combat: Boomslang compares his Courage to 70: Failure :(

"Is that cake... made of bats?" asks Boomslang, eye twitching.

Sandstorm pffts. "Is that it?" He gives the gloomy jet a sneer, digs a handful of the horrible horrible cake and stuffs it right in his face without flinching.

Darkwing fears very little, and Cake isnt one of them. "Yes. What don't want some after the torture you've been through?" He asks as he takes a large portion of cakke and eats ti without bother. He's had to suffer much worse things in his life.

The goblin actually stares as both the robots manage to eat the shrikebat cake without gagging or vomitting. Voice faint, he demands, "Second helpings."

Combat: Boomslang compares his Courage to 90: Failure :(

Combat: Sandstorm compares his Courage to 90: Success!

Combat: Darkwing compares his Courage to 90: Success!

Boomslang shreds his slice of cake with a two-second-long burst from his autocannon until it's spinning dry by way of response, leaving a scorched and ripped patch on the table.

Boomslang storms away to go collect his medal. "Hnph. Bat country. Not coming back here."

Sandstorm says, ".. Dude, you could of just said no." Sandstorm retorts with a chuckle, before gouging another wedge of the horrible cake in his mouth. Then griiiiiiins slightly mad-like at Darkwing. "Maybe you'll get lucky and get deadly poison from it.""

Darkwing says, "I know my fate isn't at the end of this cake, You will die of fuel poisoning long before I do wrecker." He says and also takes another large portion and eats it without any trouble."

Grimlock has arrived.

The goblin tosses down a bottle of ketchup from his ballon and suggests, "Bat cake with ketchup?"

Combat: Sandstorm compares his Courage to 100: Failure :(

Combat: Darkwing compares his Courage to 100: Success!

Darkwing says, "Your looking ill their wrecker. Can't handle a little bit of Alien food?" He asks as he of course takes the thrid helping for cake with Ketchup on it, once again showing no hint of backign down or gettign sick as he finishes the sllice."

Sandstorm takes another handful... but then stops to stare when the goblin offers the ketchup. "... You have got to be kidding." Looks at the ketchup, the cake, the goblin. Shrugs, takes it, pours it on the cake. Stuffs it in his mouth. "Bah. See, that's.... eh..." He stops, optic twitching for a moment. Seems his body remembered something, he doesn't actually have a stomach. "Oh frag this!" He charges off to go spit it all back out behind a bush somewhere. "GAH!" A bit more gagging. "Someone get me some booze to wash the burning out of my mouth!"

The goblin looks satisfied as at least one of the robots finally remembers that he's a robot, and he announces, "Silver to," he looks at the list again, "Darkwing and Bronze to," another list check, "Sandstorm. May I suggest Bar Moon for after event celebrations? We have a vast selection of libations for every species!"

"Screw the celebrating. I'm gonna go get slagged to the point I don't remember eating that slop!" Sandstorm really isn't looking all that well as he staggers off, which is really odd to see from a Wrecker. Uuuugh.

Grimlock shows up! Late, of course. "Grr! It eatings contest? Me Grimlock shoulda done that! Me Grimlock eat ANYTHING!" he nods, stepping out into whatever bit of the audience he's meander out onto. "That me job."

Darkwing chuckles darkly, as this is yet enough thing he's managed to beat a Wrecker at. OF course being a Powermaster it might be an unfair advanatage, but he's a Decepticon. What's he care about beign a bit unfair.

Grapple seems to have vanished sometime during the entire cake-eating debacle. Strangely, the yellow companion cube is also gone.

&lt;Autobot&gt; Sandstorm gargles loudly. "Ugh. I think I understand the whole cake is a lie thing now. That was horrible!"

&lt;Autobot&gt; Sit-Com says, "The cake has always been a lie."

Results:

Gold: Boomslang

Silver: Darkwing

Bronze: Sandstorm Got To Keep The Weighted Companion Cube: Grapple