Dust-Up on Cowboy World

The Trifid nebula is a particularly beautiful stellar factory that glows with the blue light of scattered starlight, as well as the red light of hydrogen emission as it generates more and more new stars. The blue haze surrounds the red in a lovely display, each color distinct from the other.

Harrow is piloting the Triumph, which has several 'con gumbies... and a bitty stego tape. THIS PLANET IS GOING DOWN. She parks the shuttle in some dusty backwater town, and drops the hatch which flattens the local bank. Naturally, the inhabitants panic and scream. Harrow has secured herself a nifty cowboy hat for some reason. "ALRIGHT THEN! This shouldn't be too hard. TAPE! Do you have the warhead?"

Clutch pilots an Autobot shuttle - the generic, unarmed kind that has taken brave Autobots to their dooms...er, to their /destinations/ for eons - through the Triffid Nebula. With all of the recent Autobot activity in Space, pilots are often drafted into such jobs. Transport these supplies here, ferry this diplomat there, aid this spy in insertion to this enemy fortress...

Slugfest has already decided that he doesn't like Harrow. She's bossy and uptight, and he's pretty sure she's been muttering curses at him. "I have warhead, dumbhead! You remember to bring brainhead?" He grumbles, not entirely sure that what he just said made any sense and even less sure that he cares whether it did or not. "And my name Slugfest not TAPE!" He trundles toward the boarding hatch. He's not wearing any kind of cowboy gear, which is too bed. That would have been quite cute! And that's precisely why he didn't wear any.

On her way to some destination or other, for a covert recon mission, Moonracer's gumby pilot notified her of a distress call coming from the fairly nearby Cowboy World. Looking at the info coming in, the femme orders the pilot to take her in and wait in orbit after she'd been dropped off. The little shuttle set down a fair way from the Decepticons, and Moonracer hopped off, transformed, and immediately took off towards the Decepticons, stopping out of detection range. Transforming once more, the femme sniper sneaks closer, so as to avoid getting shot up too early.

Combat: Moonracer slips into the shadows and out of sight...

Harrow narrows her optics at Slugfest as she heads down the ramp. "Primitives," she mutters, and points towards the what appears to be the center of the Western-themed town. "Dig a hole and put it over there," she orders, then idly moves to trample some stables. Blue-green horse-like critters whinny and scatter in all directions, then abruptly sprout leathery wings and flutter off.

Slugfest isn't the fastest of Soundwave's cassettes, and he's even less swift when he's carrying a giant warhead. The device is pegged to his side in place of one of his vibro cannons, and, so placed, it causes him to list. It's all he can do to keep from tilting onto his side with his wimpy legs flailing. "Why I carry, Airplane? You bigger! But I dig better, so that why maybe." He looks about at the fluttering horse-things, which whicker and warble at him as he clumps alaong. Finally, he sets the warhead down and starts to dig a hole, using his head as a spade as well as his blunt forefeet.

Clutch peers at one of the displays on his shuttle. He's picking up another Autobot vessel on scanners, and a quick coded comm conversation with the gumby pilot tells him why, and who's on the planet. Clutch decides she just might need some back-up and brings his craft down for a covert landing of his own. Soon his car form is revving his enging in the shuttle's cargo bay, although he waits before departing. Not sure if a car can blend in on a cowboy planet, and lacking the stealth skills that Moonracer has, Clutch decides to sit tight until it looks like the skills he /does/ posses are needed.

Flying blue-green horses? Well, that was a new one. Moonracer crept forward, using the long grass and nearby buildings to keep herself out of sight, and she watches the Decepticons for a moment. That looks an awful lot like a bomb. Probably gonna need a bit of backup, so she radios and hopes that someone's nearby that can get here quick. <> And then she returns her attention to the Decepticons, and decides that, since the smaller one is the one actually /placing/ the bomb, he'd be priority target. Bringing her rifle from it's nice little subspace niche, she levels it and takes aim at the Casseticon through the nice, advanced scope containing all kinds of nifty targeting information.

Combat: Moonracer takes extra time to aim her next attack.

Harrow simply stands watch, though decidedly impatiently, tapping her foot. She's not a very good sentry, as she's oblivious to Moonracer's aiming. "Hurry it up, we don't have all day. I've got a medical shift to show up for, so you best hope Galvatron or Shockwave aren't waiting on me!" She pauses and peers at Slugfest's work. "Alright, that's deep enough. Bury it and will detonate once we get into orbit."

It might strike one as cute to see a 3 foot stegosaurus digging a whole with his head - this would only last as long as it took for one to realize that the hole Slugfest is digging is for a Planet Destroyer. The work takes him a bit, and he grumbles endlessly - alternating between complaining that he has to do it himself and bragging that he doesn't need Harrow's help. When he's finally done, he steps back from the hole, which now has the silver tip of a warhead rising out of it, and proceeds to snarl at a band of humanoid aliens in spacedungarees that have come to kick at him. "You hurry when little squishies pestering! If you got somewheres to be, why you here on other planet? Grrragh!" He swings his spiky little tail, knocking an alien cowpunch right on his blue-jeaned ass.

Moonracer watches, getting angered at the injuring of humanoid's, and decides her aim is good enough. Besides, she needs to take at least /one/ of these two down before they can detonate. The longer she can keep them on-planet, the safer the planet will be. Leaning out from behind a barn-like structure just enough to be able to aim her rifle, she leans out just an inch further, to avoid her laser scorching the building, and possibly setting fire to it, and slowly squeezes the trigger. "Eat laser, slag-head." She mutters as a single laser blast streaks towards that 3 foot stegasaurus.

Combat: Sneak Attack!!

Combat: Moonracer strikes Slugfest with her One-shot One-kill! attack! [Pulled -2]

Blue Sportscar  revs his engine one last time, then peels out, racing down the exit ramp and out into the Cowboy Planet proper. <>

The Global Pose Tracker marks that Blue Sportscar  has 'skipped' his action for this round.

Harrow barely has time to react to the bullying cowboyish aliens before a laser from seemingly nowhere lances out and nails Slugfest. She whirls in the direction of the shot and spots none other than Moonracer. "AUTOBOT!" she shrieks, drawing her pistol on the femme, "Retreat if you know what's good for you! We can detonate this warhead at any moment!!"

Combat: Harrow misses Moonracer with her Ice Pistol attack!

"Nggaakkh! Who do that?!" Moonracer's rifle shot hits Slugfest high on his left flank, leaving a nice little hole surrounded by a ring of blackened armor. "I KILL YOU!" He flies into a rage, stomping in a furious circle and knocking over anything and anyone that gets in his way. Ten-gallon hats go rolling. He finally catches sight of Moonracer and aims his single vibro cannon at her. "BREAK, Autobot!"

Combat: Slugfest misses Moonracer with his Solar-Powered Vibro-Cannon attack!

(A note to the kiddies: No alien cowboys were harmed in the filming of this episode.)

Oh, good, another Autobot to back her up! Moonracer fires, and immediately ducks back behind the barn-like structure, which saves her from both Harrow's ice gun and Slugfest's little cannon while she radios Clutch over the local broadband. <> Of course, that building isn't faring to well after that, but it's still standing. Calling out from behind the building at Harrow's remark, she almost sounds like she's chuckling. "And blow yourselves up too? I don't think you'd commit suicide to blow up this planet." As she moves around to the other side of the building, she peeks out and chuckles, transforming and racing directly at Slugfest. He seemed to be the more destructive threat to the population of the planet at the moment.

Crouching, Moonracer shifts into a Cybertronian Car!

Combat: Cybertronian Car  strikes Slugfest with her Ram attack!

Blue Sportscar  makes a skidding turn around the barn, falling into line next to Moonracer. But while she goes for the offensive driving, Clutch rotates a small turret from his trunk and fires of a stream of glowing, sickly-green pellets at Harrow. It's kind of ironic that Moonracer, the consummate sniper, uses an attack relying on brute force while Clutch, the rugged bruiser, fires with ranged weapons - in the end though, they're both seemingly effective even when not using their primary methods of attack.

Combat: Blue Sportscar  misses Harrow with his Acid Pellets attack!

Missing does not do much to soothe the savage beast that is Slugfest. He tromps toward the barn, his little jaws gnashing sharp teeth. "No dodging, Autobot! Come out and get hurting!" The sound of an engine revving makes him stop and think...he knows he should be reacting somehow, but he's forgotten just what that sound means. **KLUNK!** He's promptly treated to a heaping helping of Bumper Salad and goes sailing adorably through the air - though the curses that spill forth from his saurian head are anything but adorable. He lands at Harrow's feet, kicking and complaining.

Combat: Slugfest takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

Harrow scowls after Moonracer, then narrowly avoids getting pelted with acid, spinning away with a yelp. "Another! Can't you people mind your own business!? C'mon, it's a fraggin' cowboy planet, WHO CARES!?" She stomps her foot and reaches to scoop Slugfest up, brandishing him threateningly at Clutch. With a dash and leap, she makes to bring the cassette down upon the sportscar's hood.

Combat: Harrow sets her defense level to Fearless.

Combat: Harrow misses Blue Sportscar  with Slugfest's Chainsaw Plates attack!

Ahh, the satisfying sound of her bumper smashing an unsuspecting Decepticon. Moonracer rev's her engine a couple times, but instead of racing again towards a target, her front end suddenly slides open, revealing an Electro-Cannon, and it's charged. Crackling with electricity, the cybertronian car sits still, apparently waiting for something. But what the unassuming car is /actually/ doing is aiming.....At Harrow, this time. "We'll fight for /anyone/ that you Decepticons threaten to destroy! That's what makes us better than you!"

Combat: Cybertronian Car  takes extra time to aim her next attack.

Blue Sportscar  skids to a stop, then transforms, staring at Harrow and Slugfest in shock. He just has enough time to raise his own hands and grab Harrow's arms, keeping those deadly plates away. "Haven't you Decepticons learned...the power of sticking together?" His tone and his expression both turn grim, and he tries to apply pressure, forcing Harrow's improvised weapon onto her own shoulder.

Clutch transforms into robot mode!

Combat: Clutch compares his Strength to Harrow's Strength: Failure :(

Harrow's optics widen as Slugfest's rapidly sliding plates come dangerously close to her shoulder, but she summons some wild strength at the last nano and shoves Clutch away! "Yeah yeah, best friends forever, shut it Autoscum, I don't want to hear your pathetic morals!" Ignorant to Moonracer's aiming, she tries yet again to mash poor Slugfest into Clutch's chest.

Combat: Harrow strikes Clutch with Slugfest's Chainsaw Plates attack! [Pulled -1]

"Hahaha!" Slugfest cackles as he's hefted as a weapon. "Now you two Autobots be 2 and half! Or...1 and 2 halfs!" When he does not feel sweet ripping metal, his tone changes abruptly. "Gragh! You dumb plane! YOU DOING IT WRONG! 'Post to hit Autobot!" All this he shouts over the screaming of his whirling spine plates. He flails about, trying to twist himself around as Clutch pushes him back toward Harrow's shoulder. It doesn't occur to him to simply stop his plates from spinning, of course. He panics for a brief moment before Harrow manages to overpower Clutch. Feeling himself carving into the Autobot, he begins to cackle again. "That right way, Plane! You DID bring brainhead today!"

Combat: Slugfest takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

Cybertronian Car  should have fired sooner. Maybe she could have saved Clutch some pain, but that's in the past now, and she fires, a bolt of electricity shooting out of that cannon and arcing towards Harrow's chestplate. If that doesn't make the Decepticon drop his 'chainsaw buddy', she isn't sure what will. "You might not want to hear about morals, but you're going to get a double helping of them /now/!"

Combat: Cybertronian Car  misses Harrow with her Electro-Cannon attack!

Clutch stumbles back, chest newly savaged by Slugfest and optics newly filled with respect for Harrow's deceptively average-looking arm servoes. "This...isn't going as planned." Moonracer's shot gives Clutch a chance to back off further, out of Slugfest distance (or so he hopes). Clutch then reaches both hands behind his back, and when they come back each holds a heavy-duty pistol with an extended ammo clip. Looking closely, you can see that the front facing edge of the clips are actually open to the air, and that rather than normal shells or bullets, they're tiny little rockets. Which he proceeds to let fly in a barrage of micro-rockets! "They'll get a double helping of something all right!" He calls back to Moonracer.

Combat: Clutch misses Slugfest with his Micro Missiles Area attack! [Pulled -5]

Combat: Clutch strikes Harrow with his Micro Missiles Area attack! [Pulled -5]

Harrow gets a little manic, weilding her chainsaw dinosaur like a horror film baddie. "Hahaha!" In her zeal, she stumbles over a small boulder, and Moonracer's electro-charged shot skims just over Harrow's wing tip. Before she can throw an offended fit about it, Clutch's micro-rockets strike her armor and explode extravagantly. "AIEE!" In an angry flaming ball of Seeker, she lunches towards clutch with her scalpel out. "Tape! Go after the femme!"

Combat: Harrow misses Clutch with her Vibro-Scalpel attack!

Slugfest manages to twist free of Harrow's grasp in time to avoid being blasted by Clutch's missiles. He hits the ground with a cute little TUMP, and scrambles to his feet intending to counterattack. He scowls as Harrow orders him away. "You get femme! You IS femme! I win bigger fight with strong guy." But Harrow is attacking now, and he has missed his opening. So Slugfest reluctantly turns toward Moonracer. Might as well focus on her, lest she pop off another cheap shot. "Fine! Come here, Autofemme! Pain time for you!"

Combat: Slugfest misses Cybertronian Car  with his Solar-Powered

Clutch thought he'd backed off far enough - but once again he underestimated the Seeker. Reflexes programmed for fencing kick in and he jerks up a hand to block - only there's no sword in the hand, there's a pistol. THNK! The scalpel sticks into the side of it, probably ruining the mechanism, and Clutch releases his weapon to leave it stuck like a giant metal cork on the end of Harrow's scalpel. "That's a nice blade," he murmers in honest admiration. "Almost as nice as /this/ one!" He finishes. Clutch raises his previously empty hand, but now it holds an ornate cylindrical handle decorated with rich, dark wood and brass highlights. Depressing a tiny control causes two long spikes of electricity to flare into existence from the ends, like an elongated punch dagger. Which he proceeds to 'punch' straight at Harrow!

Combat: Clutch strikes Harrow with his Steampunk Sabre attack!

Well, at least one of them could hit Harrow. Moonracer transforms once again to roll out of the way of Slugfest's vibro-cannon shot. Coming to her feet with a smirk, the femme laughs. "Pain? I'll show you pain, shorty!" And with that she rushes straight at the little loudmouthed dinobot wanna-be, leaping into the air and coming in feet first. She apparently can't hit Harrow, but she's done pretty good against this little guy so far. And Clutch can probably handle the femme Seeker.

Combat: Moonracer strikes Slugfest with her Kick attack!

Slugfest is slow slow slow! Blame it on his weight and his stubby legs. He can't even begin to THINK about avoiding Moonracer's dropkick, so he just takes it like a mech and goes bouncing. "I hate you so much! GNARRRR! Time to break you both!" He starts whirling, kicking up dust, grit, cowboy aliens, and winged horses. Buildings topple before the might of this brutal tantrum, and, if he's lucky, Moonracer and Clutch will, too!

Combat: Slugfest strikes Cybertronian Car  with his Festival of Slugging Area attack!

Combat: Slugfest misses Clutch with his Festival of Slugging Area attack!

"Gahh!" Harrow can't enjoy the compliment, as she is stabbed right in the fuel tanks. This is proving to be difficult. "Tape!" she calls, weakly, "Let's just get on the shuttle and blow these fraggers to the Pits along with the rest of the planet!" With a baleful look flung upon Clutch, she turns heel and runs for the Triumph, streaming energon down her frame. Once at the console, she fires up the engines and coats the surrounding mechs with a blast of dust.

Harrow has left.

Harrow enters the Decepticon Shuttle .

Combat: Decepticon Shuttle <Triumph> misses Clutch with its DUST!!! attack!

Well, that didn't work quite as advertised. Moonracer gets pummeled by Slugfest's tantrum, and is severely dented in the process! "Owww!" The pain of that tiny whirling dirvish overwhelms her systems for a brief moment, but she recovers by pushing herself to top speed and getting some distance between her and the offending Decepticon. Her optics noting the possible departure of the Deepticon shuttle, she glances over at the bomb and then back at the shuttle...."Clutch! Don't let them take off! They'll blow the bomb they planted!" And she again grabs her rifle, aiming this time at the shuttle's engines, to try to keep it grounded.

Combat: Moonracer sets her defense level to Aggressive.

Combat: Moonracer strikes Decepticon Shuttle <Triumph> with her Pulse Laser Grenade Launcher attack!

Clutch has to dive to avoid the collapsing walls of the barn. Then he rolls, flips and lurches to his feet, miraculously avoiding Slugfest's wrath. Just in time to fling up both arms to cover his optics as the dust really begins to fly, courtesy of Harrow. Clutch hunches over slightly to brace himself further and ride it out. He does indeed get coated with dust, but...it's dust. And doesn't seem to bother him too much. With all the time he's spent off-roading, maybe he's just used to it. Once the storm has ended, Clutch lowers his arms to look up, optics flaring in anger. He reaches over his shoulder and pulls out a large tubular rocket launcher (wow has he got some subspace-powered backpack back there?) which he hefts and then points at the shuttle, adding his firepower to Moonracer's. "Bomb? Where is it?" He's already thinking of a plan B, uncertain if they can keep the Decepticons from taking off.

Combat: Clutch strikes Decepticon Shuttle <Triumph> with his RPG to the Engines attack!

Two alien cowboys sit on a fencerail and watch the chaos unfolding from a distance. One of them asks, "What you think that's about?" The other spits a nice stream of tobacco juice, tips the brim of his hat up with his thumb and says, "Rustlers."

Decepticon Shuttle <Triumph>'s engines whine in protest as Moonracer's grenade launcher sets them ablaze, and shatters part of the housing. Harrow slams the console angrily, "INSOLENT FOOLS!" So long as the shuttle is within the atmosphere, Harrow can't exactly detonate the massive explosive, so she continues trying to get away. Clutch's rocket launcher does some nice heaping damage, and the Triump lists to one side, still hovering, but only just. Harrow slams a button, firing randomly.

Combat: Decepticon Shuttle <Triumph> sets its defense level to Fearless.

Combat: Decepticon Shuttle <Triumph> misses Moonracer with its Rocket attack!

"What you mean run away?!" Slugfest was just starting to enjoy laying down a whooping! He tries to turn and shuffle toward the ship. "Hey wait! I no can run! Got little feets! Airplane!" He trots as fast as his four stumpy appendages will carry him and, amid a tremendous swirl of dust, manages to make his way onto the boarding ramp. There, he slows and drags his tail. "Haw haw, Autobot stupids! We blow you up now!" He turns to fire a parting shot at Clutch, feeling quite superior even as Moonracer's grendade explodes against the hull.

Combat: Slugfest misses Clutch with his Solar-Powered Vibro-Cannon attack!

Lining up a second shot just as Clutch's RPG strikes, causing the shuttle to list, Moonracer decides instead to go after the bomb. Turning and running for the freshly dug hole containing the bomb, the femme starts to uncover the explosive as fast as she possibly can! (Which is pretty quick, given her speed. ;p) "It's over here! I'll dig it up, you keep that shuttle from leaving!"

Combat: Moonracer takes extra time to steady herself. [Pass]

"Um, yeah, about that..." Clutch hefts the RPG almost apologetically. "That was my only shot!!" He quickly discards the weapon and then dives for cover yet again as Slugfest's cannon thuds into the ground he had been standing on a second before. Not even bothering to stand up, Clutch transforms and then races at the shuttle, finding a conviently ramp-shaped bit of collapsed building to jump off of...he transforms in mid-jump, then activates his saber again, trying to jam the energy blades into the side of the ship to use as a makeshift hand-hold.

Combat: Clutch strikes Decepticon Shuttle <Triumph> with his Steampunk Sabre attack!

"Got to get away faster, Airplane," growls Slugfest, "Autobots not exploded yet!" He clearly doesn't understand the whole detonator-bomb relationship. "Use guns to shoot!" He's a helpful stego. "And make ramp go up!" He stumbles around, rocked this way and that as the various attacks of the Autobots buffet the shuttle, working in tandem with the pitching wind.

Combat: Slugfest misses Clutch with his Solar-Powered Vibro-Cannon attack!

The double blades of Clutch's sabre pierce straight into the hull, and Harrow sputters. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY SHUTTLE!?" she screams, and grabs at the steering console to pull the craft into a tight spin, hoping to fling Clutch off. "Slugfest! Where is the detonator!" ...The detonator is on the ground, outside, being sniffed at by one of those winged alien horses. "Don't tell me we forgot the detonator!!"

Combat: Decepticon Shuttle <Triumph> misses Clutch with its OFF PLZ attack!

Digdigdig! Moonracer's hands a blur as they toss dirt up out of the ever-growing hole that holds the bomb, she stops and smiles as she lifts the explosive up out of the hole. Heavy, but not so heavy that the femme sharpshooter can't lift and carry it, she takes a couple steps and looks up at Clutch. "Got it. What's your plan?" She calls up to him over the roar of the shuttle's struggling engines. She's tempted to set the bomb down and just take another shot at the shuttle, to keep the Decepticons here, while they run off with the bomb, and take it home to use against the Decepticons later on.

Clutch manages to avoid any serious damage from all the shooting and spinning, but the thrashing shuttle manages to ruin his already tenuous hold on the hull. Sizzling angrily, his energy blade slides free of the Triumph's thick armor and he falls to the ground below - which luckily isn't far enough down to make him go splat. But it is far enough to knock him silly as he lands in an ungraceful backflop. Looks like it's all up to Moonracer now...

Far off, a bronco-busting competition judge checks his stopwatch and shakes his head sternly. "Two more seconds and he'd have finished the ride."

"Thuh wut?" Slugfest waddles into the shuttle and sits down in his cute little way. "Make the bomb explode, huh? OH WAIT! Explodey thing, right? Dead-uh-nater. Uh...think it on ground. Maybe Autobots push it? Or maybe shoot bomb!" The gravity of the situation escapes him. "Whatever. We no need dead 'o nater. We just make bomb blow up. Right?"

Combat: Slugfest takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass]

Decepticon Shuttle <Triumph>'s engines sputter unhappily, but they manage to push the damaged shuttle into the dry atmosphere, albeit trailing thick clouds of smoke. Harrow closes the hatch, making sure Slugfest is secured, scowling at their lack of... luck, sure. Couldn't be lack of planning. Decepticons are expert planners. "Can't shoot, weapons are offline. Maybe someone will step on it or something."

Combat: Decepticon Shuttle <Triumph> begins retreating, outrunning all pursuit.

Outside, Watching the Decepticons managing to get their shuttle aimed in the right direction, Moonracer sets the bomb down and cringes, waiting for the explosion.....Wait for it....Oh, what's that lying on the ground over there? Is that...? No way! Looks a lot like a detonator, to the femme sniper. Walking over, she picks it up and chuckles, then walks over to where Clutch fell and kneels down beside him. "You ok? That was a nasty spill you took. But we got lucky, they dropped the detonator, so we aren't gonna be vaporized. And now we have a nice bomb we can use on them later."