Ambushed by Autobots

It is 8:46 PM on a cold October night. The sun has long since set, replaced by a blanket of stars. The highway isn’t nearly as busy as it was a few hours ago. Most of the traffic has already found their way home or wherever, but there are still a number of cars travelling. Except that traffic seems to have backed up heading into Washington, D.C. There weren’t any signs posted, so perhaps it’s an accident.

Misfire flies in the true Decepticon formation, parallel over the highway. His arms are outstretched in front of him and his legs are straight back. Aimless currently resides in gun form in his right hand. Misfire is high above the highway, scanning the ground below.

A cloud of dust rises in the horizon! As the dust cloud gets closer, one can hear the pelting of little feets. Closer still and the unmistakable whine of a chainsaw is heard. It's Slugfest!

<>

The finely-polished Porsche weaves in and around other slower cars as it makes its way towards downtown. The vehicle's windows are tinted with a reflective material, making it difficult to see the impatient driver behind the wheel. Of course, the catch is there's no driver behind the wheel! Yea, I know big surprise.

<>

Dust Devil laughs, <> The rather Cybertronian vehicle behind Jazz has been pretending to be driving behind the Porsche and then suddenly raises up above the other vehicles. < He can't fly but he can hover some distance above the others. The winds generated by Dust Devil's turbines buffet the Porsche below him. One might think he was purposely directing it at the other Autobot.

Whatever it is up there, it’s doing a good job of creating a traffic jam. Four lanes of traffic have shrunk to a mere two. There’s still movement, but trying to get that many cars through a bottleneck like that makes it frustrating for all. A few cars begin to honk their horns up ahead, and it has a chain reaction. Whatever the reason might be, subsequent car owners begin honking their horn in frustration. Some have even begun trying to go partially off the road, driving over the gravel at the side of the road, though so far no one’s been bold enough to drive through what looks like a ditch, separating farmland from the highway.

Misfire pauses over the snarl of traffic and begins to hover. He points Aimless at each of the cars and begins to laugh. "Ok...This should make for good target practice!" He begins to aim.

Slugfest rushes at the traffic and tries cutting his way through it! "No should be all these cars here. Out of way! Me make way through!"

<>

Shuffling his dash-mounted MP3 players past playlists labelled CHILL, GROOVY, and ROCKING, Jazz eventually settles on the FUNKY. Keeping his tinted windows up, the Autobot starts blasting his favourite Earth, Wind, and Fire song as he tries to keep pace with Dust Devil.

That's when all of a sudden, the Porsche dashboard lights up with an energon signature warning. <>

A tiny antenna dish pops out of the Porsche's roof, swivelling around to pin-point the exact location of the mentioned energon signatures.

Dust Devil rotates in the air and acks, <> He does move sideways a big more so he's off the road itself. <>

The M1A3 Abrams main battle tank at the head of the traffic jam suddenly comes to an abrupt stop. The car behind him, trying to merge into the left lane, slams on his breaks, and honks his horn. Someone behind him does the same, and again, and again. Even Jazz probably can’t hear his music with all that honking going on. The turret on the tank rotates, moving 180 degrees, so that it now aims behind itself, and at the hovering craft. It emits over speakers, “Unidentified flying. . . car. You are in United States controlled air space. Surrender or you will be fired upon.”

 Special Agent Marauder says, "Decepticons, a target has just presented itself."

 Slugfest says, "Yay!"

 Misfire says, "Fantastic!"

Slugfest stops sawing into cars long enough to turn around and head for the target Marauder mentioned. He LEAPS into the air to try to tapedance all over it!

 Snaptrap says, "Elaborate."

 Special Agent Marauder says, "An energon-based dusty blue hovercraft."

 Special Agent Marauder says, "Dual turrets."

 Snaptrap says, "Dust Devil. A nuisance, at best."

 Snaptrap says, "Terminate at your discretion."

<Decepticon> Special Agent Marauder says, "There are approximately 50 Terran vehicles in the vicinity. I expect no less than one, and no more than three of them will be Autobots as well."

<Decepticon> Snaptrap says, "Are you saying that this situation is beyond your capability?"

<Decepticon> Misfire says, "Nah, I'm providing Air Support, what could go wrong?"

<Decepticon> Misfire says, "Nah, I'm providing Air Support, what could go wrong?"

<Decepticon> Windshear huffs, "Wait you as /air support/? What?

<Decepticon> Special Agent Marauder says, "I am more than capable of dealing with two to four Autobots. Be advised that I am receiving 'support' from Misfire and Slugfest."

<Decepticon> Snaptrap says, "Well carry on, then."

<Decepticon> Misfire says, "See Windshear, everything is under control."

<Decepticon> Windshear mmms, "Im sorry."

<Decepticon> Windshear says, "Under control? Tell me what you are doing right now?""

<Decepticon> Misfire says, "What I always do, point Aimless at the enemy and let him rip!"

<Decepticon> Windshear says, "Does anyone know if Slugest has opposible thumbs?""

<Decepticon> Snaptrap says, "I would hope Slugfest would."

As the Decepticons open up with all their purple-fury of cartoon firepower, Jazz explodes upwards from his Porsche mode figuring there's not much need for a disguise at this point. "Yo humans! Get to safety and all that jazz! These bad dudes are lookin' to mess up downtown D.C. and we're gonna give 'em a fight just like the ol' George Washington militia!" Swinging his rifle towards the hefty Abrams tank ahead, Jazz leaps over and behind a few emptied cars, letting loose with a few blasts of photon energy. "You guys don't make the rules around here! Unless your name is Honest Abe Lincoln, then I ain't believin' a word you're sayin' blockhead!"

<Decepticon> Windshear says, "Perhaps he should fire aimless..."

<Decepticon> Special Agent Marauder says, "We have a confirmed sighting of Autobot Intelligence Director Jazz."

<Decepticon> Misfire says, "You think? That might work....Windshear."

<Decepticon> Windshear has a smirk in the tone of his voice. "Give it a try, I mean its not like it could do more harm ..."

<Decepticon> Misfire says, "In my experience it could always get worse..."

Dust Devil YELPS as he's suddenly hit by Misfire. He spins around, "You jerk! How can I go ta the museum if I'm damaged!" He shoots a few low level shots to drive the Decepticon away from the humans.

<Decepticon> Snaptrap says, "When you are involved, it invariably does."

<Decepticon> Misfire says, "For the Autobots! *cackling*"

<Decepticon> Snaptrap says, "...right. Marauder, status report."

The M1A3 Abrams main battle tank, sitting there motionless, cars preventing it from going backward, and closer to the Autobots, is in no position to evade. Thankfully, the Autobot Intelligence Director completely overshoots the tank, creating a pothole in the pavement ahead. Transforming to its equally massive robot form, it steps on the hood of the car in front, then the roof, crushing it, and probably leaving the human inside needing the jaws of life to get out, before engaging its antigravity systems. It leaps towards the Intelligence Director, shouting, "Come on you droids. You want to live forever?" Three wrist blades emerge from its right hand, jutting out, as it tries to go for what would be the ribcage, were Jazz a human.

Misfire easily hovers to the left of Dust Devil's blast. He begins to cackle, "This pathetic planet has a muesum? What could they possibly have that is worth preserving? Or even worth collecting?" He continues to fire at Dust Devil. "Die Auto-Scum!"

<Decepticon> Special Agent Marauder says, "I have engaged Jazz. Slugfest and Misfire are handling Dust Devil."

Jazz looks on as his defensive volley is off the mark and the Autobot officer almost can't believe it. "What the?! Maybe I outta get this thing checked out by Percy! This thing NEVER misses!" Getting caught up and distracted with the shiny rifle in his hands, the blue-visored good guy doesn't notice Marauder's imposing form stomping towards him until it's too late.

"Aaaahhh! Watch it with those blades dude! If you were smart enough, you would have gone for the fuel lines, but don't wanna tell you how to do your job you sorry excuse for a Megatron stunt-double!"

Taking a few steps back to give himself some room for acceleration, Jazz springs forward and delivers a few quick punches to the Decepticon's mid-section, followed by an elbow towards the head, and the nimble attacker finishes it off with a leg sweep to hopefully drop the larger foe.

"Blurr taught me this one!" Jazz shouts out as he snaps through the combination in a jiffy.

Dust Devil is getting slammed pretty bad. Well, chewed on and slammed. The stego goes for his tires, however he has no tires. So suddenly he's got a Stego hanging onto his Fans that provide lift. He wobbles badly in the air, completely off balance. He speeds up the fans, doing the cat hanging from the ceiling fan manuever with the stego...hopefully he lands somewhere nasty. But In his attempt to get away from Slugfest he speeds toward Misfire, hoping to ram the jerk who is ruining his day off!

<Autobot> Dust Devil says, "Slaggit I can't get a bead on them,"

<Autobot> Jazz says, "Just aim for the ugly one! You'll be sure to hit somebody then!"

Marauder continues to press his advantage. His wrist blades retract, but only so that he can free his right hand for a secondary assault. “That would only serve to expedite the process. And I plan to enjoy this.” The punches to the midsection are blocked, or don’t seem to have any measureable effect on the behemoth. The elbow towards the head is swatted away. It’s becoming clear that his upper body is both strong and flexible. But the same cannot be said for his lower extremities. He has a rather high centre of gravity, and so when Jazz goes for the leg sweep, it is successful, knocking Marauder onto his back. He hands across three cars, smashing windshields, roofs, and hoods as his arms spread out to break his fall, and the unfortunate vehicles between him and the ground. Slowly, he rises, using a hand to help lift him up. He must not be very agile, but his main armament, a railgun, rotates, locking on the centre of Jazz’s upper torso. The barrel begins to glow in a soft pinkish hue, building up energy before releasing a simple, steel round. There is no explosive attached, only velocity, for this shell would outdistance some of the fastest fighter jets.

Misfire lets out a chuckle as the Hover Car flies towards him. "Auto-fool, we Decepticons invented Aerial Combat. We own the skies!" He continues to chuckle as he launches his free hand out at Dust Devil, hoping to swat him towards the ground!

The little stegosaur got to chew on something, and drops to the ground! "Taste funny," he says, "So me hit!" He tries to smack the hovercar with his tail.

Jazz must be as fast as a fighter jet or really lucky. It's probably the latter as he dives to the ground, avoiding the whistling shell as it sails by and into an unlucky Buick (as if they didn't look bad enough as is) which leaves the American automobile with a fresh, new gaping hole.

Jazz shifts around in a break-dance manoeuvre that ends up with him turning back into his Porsche 935 Turbo mode. Suddenly, the fast car's windows drop down as the stereo systems starts blaring out a patriotic, and familiar tune to those humans that are still within an earshot of the battle.

<<Since we're in D.C. and this is the home of the brave, how about a little Star Spangled Banner to let you feel the spirit of the United States!>> In this case, the so-called spirit feels a lot more like an audio-bashing of triumphant horns and rattling drums.

Dust Devil is running out of options. He's lost manoeuvrability and speed with the attacks that have hit him. He decides to give himself some cover and whirls up a dust storm to direct at the more scary of his adversaries. The stego is annoying but deadly? nah.

Marauder stands there, in the middle of the traffic jam, waiting for Jazz to retaliate. He gestures with his hand for Jazz to come at him once the Autobot becomes a vehicle. But instead, Jazz plays music and horrendous music at that. This confuses the Decepticon Special Agent, "And I was just starting to enjoy myself" he remarks, though it is likely missed due to the noise. For a moment, he turns to watch Misfire, Slugfest, and Dust Devil, as if he has suddenly lost all interest in his adversary. Turning his back, he even begins to walk away, slowly. "You're not worth the trouble." Placing his left hand near his face, a panel opens and he transmits a message, <<Misfire, do you require assistance?>>

Misfire lets out a cackle. "Dust?" He waves his weapon to clear out the Dustcloud as he begins to fire once more at Dust Devil. "Nah, Marauder. Everything is under control!" Misfire manages to emit between blasts.

Dust Devil has managed to not get hit a few times. That's always nice. He barely avoids getting hit by the stego and ducks when his dustcloud doesn't work. "Ya know yer a jerk...." He transforms and ducks down a moment before pulling out a pistol and firing Misfire. "Hey SLugfest, that guy stole the box of energon goodies I had for you....you should get them from him before he eats them all...."

<Autobot> Loadout says, "Loadout here. I am in the vicinity of the situation and en route. Are any of you in need of repairs?"

Slugfest stares at Misfire. "Is true? Stole energon goodies?!"

Highways are all well and fine, but when they get choked up with abandoned vehicles that tends to present a problem for most traffic. Luckily this particular individual doesn't fall into the category of 'most traffic' what with those oddly alien angles and the telltale color of cybertronian metal over the hull. This is one vehicle that would never blend in with earth traffic, but it -is- quite capable of 'hugging the shoulder' and taking a more offroad approach, large durable tires straddling the ditch along the side as it closes in on the highway battle. It's not hard to find. Just follow the line of cars in the -opposite- direction of the fleeing bystanders.

Loadout lets out a sound not unlike a sigh, his dashboard lights flashing in time with his voice, "On one hand I suppose it was a good thing the situation on Cybertron seems to have calmed down again for the moment. On the other hand I guess it was inevitable things would start up on Earth again." A moment later and he's flicking into the local Autobot broadband.

<<Loadout on scene. Is there any way I can assist?"

<Decepticon> Special Agent Marauder says, "Commander Snaptrap, when did Jazz become a coward?"

Content with his All-American concert, the Porsche transforms once more, catching Loadout's incoming communique in the process. "Yo what's up Loadout! Glad to hear your voice dude! Why don't you give Duster a hand...like only you know how to do, ya dig?!" Jazz would wink if he could as he snaps out his rifle once again, aiming at Marauder's fleeing form. "That's right ya big lug! Walk away and get on down the road! Why don't you go take a dip in the Potomac with a lot of electrical devices!"

Misfire raises his hands, careful not to point the barrell of Aimless at Slugfest. He makes a halting motion at the tape. "Uh...not right now, but uh...Aimless may have taken some when you passed out the other cycle!" He takes a step back. "Uh, see we had this debt with Swindle and well, the Predacons wanted some Energon Snacks and well, A to B to Swindle..." He takes another step back. "You understand right?" Misfire muses to himself, "How did Dust Devil find out?"

<Decepticon> Snaptrap says, "I will have to claim responsibility for that."

<Autobot> Loadout says, "Hmmm, Dust Devil, what is your current status?"

Slugfest stands there for a moment. "Oh," he finally says, "Okay, if are going to replace!" He turns around and rushes at Dust Devil. Once again he tries to put little feet marks on him!

<Autobot> Dust Devil says, "I'm hurtin pretty bad here. Not dyin but I think I got the cons about ta start fightin each other."

<Autobot> Loadout says, "Understood. First and foremost I shall see if I can alleviate that somewhat. Stand by."

Dust Devil does his best to not grin at this. He peeks up from his current hiding spot, "See Slugfest. I can't believe you let him get away with that. He's probably got the rest and is gonna eat them if you don't get them back!" He raises his pistol to send another shot toward Misfire. "I'll help you! Get him while he's distracted!"

Marauder is huge and unhurried, making himself quite the target. He has his back to Jazz, confident that the Autobot Intelligence Director is of little threat to him. As he surveys the carnage before him, he is shot in the back. For a moment, Marauder turns, to view the Autobot who would heroically fire on an unaware target. “How very noble of you,” he comments, loud enough to carry across the highway, before he turns his back on Jazz for a second time. Raising his electron cannon, he fires it in front of the incoming Autobot armoured truck, “Leave, I grow tired of this petty resistance.” Somehow, his spirits seem down, but not in the ‘I’m fighting for my life kind of way.’ This mood is more, ‘damn, I thought I was going to have a challenge.’

Loadout's sensors take a quick scan of the situation, coupled wth the feedback he's getting over the radio as well. Taking note of where Dust Devil is being menaced, he starts to move, and suddenly puts on MORE speed in short order as he becomes aware that a barrel is being pointed his way. Skidding hard to one side, the Autobot technician narrowly avoids the crackling bolt that slams into a parked care on the other side of him, before putting the 'pedal to the metal' and accelerating that much more forcefully. "Now that I'm here it's not like I can simply leave in the middle of all this!" he grunts, transforming as he goes and rising up to his robot mode. Skidding a short distance with a shower of sparks, he comes to a halt just behind Dust Devil, his right hand already retracted into his forearm for his multitool/repair module to extend outwards. "Just take a moment and let this process..." he says, turning and placing his arm against the back of Dust Devil's shoulder. There's a faint *THWUMP* noise as a bunch of special nano machines are injected into the other Autobot's systems in an attempt to promote energon flow and perform important stopgap repairs.

Pumping a blue fist into the air as Autobots do from time to time when things are good, Jazz shouts on, "Don't worry dude! I'm sure it was just as noble of you to tear up the highway here to get your blow-cars-up fix out of the way! Check ya later you big dope!" Swinging his gaze back towards Loadout and Dust Devil, Jazz motions to the burning cars down the highway. "Think you guys can handle dumb and dumber here? I'm headin' down the road to make sure those flames are put out! Gotta make all the humans are safe in the area! Meet ya'll back at base, ya dig?!" Clanking away down the road, Jazz disappears into the haze of smoke.

Misfire ducks Dust Devil's blast which allows him to be missed by Marauder's blast. "Watch your aim Marauder!" The humor in this statement is lost on Misfire. He is still locked in on Slugfest. "I wouldn't take all of them...but I'm going to have to owe you...Until my next pay ducket comes in."

Dust Devil stays ducked down as the repairs take effect. He glares. "There has ta be a less painful way of administering those....." At least he starts to feel better.

Slugfest turns and looks at Dust Devil angrily. "You trying trick me! You Autobot! You no would tell me troof!" The little stegosaur fires his lasers at the Autobot!

Marauder looms over the medic as he works on the one Snaptrap identified as Dust Devil. “Medic,” he isn’t actually sure who Loadout is, “you were given a warning shot, and that is the only one I intend to give.” He gestures with the electron cannon for the medic to move to the left, putting some distance between himself and Dust Devil.

Dust Devil looks up at the con, "Ummmmm ya think you could avoid drivin on the human roads where ya cause such a back up....or perhaps let a bunch of them by so yer not holdin up traffic?"

<Autobot> Dust Devil says, "Ummm Loadout, I think we're kinda outnumbered. I'm tryin ta see if they'll let us go"

<Autobot> Loadout says, "They're Decepticons. Unlikely to happen. If nothing else I can at least help to bridge the firepower gap for the moment."

"There -are- more comfortable methods," Loadout states as Dust Devil complains of the method of delivery for the nano machines, "...but in the middle of a chaotic situation such as this I'm afraid such luxuries must sometimes be given up." He trails off, then looks incredulously at Marauder as he actually indicates that Loadout should step -away- from Dust Devil at this point. "If you honestly think that any Autobot medic, or any self-respecting Autobot in general is going to abandon a team mate in a situation like this, you must be seriously out of touch with exactly who you think you've been fighting against all this time."

He'd narrow his eyes, if he didn't see the world through a single pulsing optic band which pulses just a bit darker as he frowns. "This situation is difficult enough already, but do NOT think for a moment that I will just sit by helplessly!" As he says this, the Autobot tehcnician proceeds to leap up, and backwards already shifting and transforming as he goes, before abruptly locking and latching onto Dust Devil's right arm, shifting and transforming around the extended limb as he quite literally 'swallows up' Dust Devil's forearm, up and past his elbow. Until the heavy cannon frame is securely attached to the other Autobot, an ominous *BWEEEE* issuing out as power begins to flow freely through Loadout's systems as his generator kicks online.

Misfire glances at his wrist comm as it goes off..."Slag it!" He begins to take off to the sky, before he launches to the sky he levels a finger at Dust Devil. "Next time Autobot!"

Dust Devil is suddenly being engulfed by the weaponised Loadout. The fierceness of the new weapon on him is an awesome sight. And for a moment he grins. "I ask ya again ta leave before people get hurt worse..." That is until Earth's gravity causes a shift in Dust Devil's formerly proud universe. "Oh no..." He is dragged down and lands on Loadout, "Sorry!" Quickly he hefts the other Autobot up at an angle so he can still fire and balance himself.

Slugfest quickly figures out what's going on, for a slow-witted stego-tape. He attempts to tapdance all over Loadout and Dust Devil! "NONONO! No shoot at me wif that!"

Marauder studies the medic as he gives an impassioned defence. “Then don’t abandon him. Take him with you. See that he is repaired. He does not concern me, nor do you, but your presence does.” He gestures to the carnage around them, to the abandoned vehicles, some trapped, and some destroyed. When he returns his gaze, he is surprised to see that where Loadout had stood, he has now bonded himself to Dust Devil, who seems full of bravado. “Before you interfered, these humans suffered traffic congestion. Now, they have suffered more. Leave, and they will suffer no further. Remain, and you jeopardise their property and their lives. The choice is yours.”

<Autobot> Loadout says, "I do not know how comfortable I am with simply 'leaving' and trusting a Decepticon to do the same after we are gone without causing anymore damage to the humans. Assuming he would even keep his word in the first place."

<Decepticon> Special Agent Marauder says, "Standby for a revised status report."

<Autobot> Loadout says, "Nonetheless, if you wish to withdraw I am in no position to say otherwise."

"A -Decepticon- engages in battle along a populated highway, and you expect us to believe that we are the ones putting human lives in jeopardy?" Loadout's voice emits from the cannon form, the status panel on his side flashing in tune with his words. "This is a switch and I admit to some incredulousness on my part. If you really have no more desire to be here I think it acceptable that -all- parties simply depart. You cannot expect us to just allow you to otherwise walk freely amongst the humans here."

Dust Devil frowns, "We weren't the ones who attacked first. Me and Jazz were goin ta the museum and I hovered higher ta see what was causin the hold-up. I ended up fightin back after I'd been attacked first." He looks at the gun on his arm and at Marauder. "I don't see a positive solution ta this if we continue. If you can keep yer comrades from botherin the humans...." he looks at Loadout, "I'm gonna need a ride outta here. The dinotape got my main rotor."

Marauder says, “You are in no position to dictate terms. Depart, and you will live. Stay, and you may die. But before you continue in this line of thought, I want you to remember, Jazz fired first, and where is he now? Safely away from here, as you should be if you value your lives.” Then, he addresses Slugfest, “Let them leave, if they do not, we will deliver their remains to Galvatron.”

Loadout is silent for a few moments. It's obvious that he doesn't like the whole situation, not that enjoys combat under any sort of circumstances. Nor is it about bravado to him, his primary focus more or less always being on other Autobots present...and bystanders of course. By now though, any humans on the scene would have to be pretty much brain-dead not to have gotten while the getting was good. "You could very well be overestimating the amount of damage you -yourself- could suffer in this case as well." While no parts of him physically move when he speaks, the cannon barrel nonetheless ALMOST would seem to glint just slightly for a brief moment, before Loadout finally comes to a decision as, for the first time since he rejoined the Autobot ranks, he's the one asked to provide a ride to someone else.

With a hiss of escaping steam, he detaches from Dust Devil's arm, relinquishing his hold and flipping forward in mid-air again as he transforms, slamming back down on all four tires yet again. He may not be an overly large cargo truck or the like, but he can still handle one average sized Autobot clutching onto the back of him when need be. He only waits long enough for Dust Devil to grab on, before he's already starting into motion, engine rumbling as he picks up speed. "All right then, let us depart this place and be done with it," he asides to his fellow Autobot.

Slugfest looks up at Marauder. "Okay!" he says. "You have energon goodies?"

<Decepticon> Special Agent Marauder says, "The Autobots are in full retreat."

<Decepticon> Windshear says, "Take a picture..."

<Decepticon> Special Agent Marauder says, "Why?"

<Decepticon> Slugfest says, "cuz will last longer?"